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Old 26th February 2013, 18:37   #166
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Default Re: Returning to India

Very Interesting thread.
To each his own, India may be best place to live for some of us but it was not my cup of tea.
We(me and my wife) left India just 3 years ago and the main reason was the rudeness , arrogance and general lack of respect for fellow humans.I am not saying that any place is perfect and certainly not US but for the most part these qualities do not affect my personal life here.
I can say this knowing what goes in the dark side of US. I am a physician in a hospital in west Baltimore.
Do I think of going back? NO.
Do I want my family here?YES.
So I am making sure they come here.I have realized you can live any where you want as long as you are with our loved ones, but if that place is civilized the experience of life becomes awesome.
This is how I explained to my mother : when I was in med school , she used to see me once every 6 months although we were i the same country, you will see me more frequently than that.
Professionally, I think this place gives you opportunity if you have the potential.
Things are wrong in USA as well, but I can live with them.

And quite surprisingly , I found India not that inexpensive when compared to just 3 years ago during my last visit.
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Old 26th February 2013, 18:47   #167
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Buddy,

We stay in India and we crib about it, but still i would say India is the best place to live. Every country has its pros and cons. In India, we crib about Traffic, roads, driving manners but in western world owing a car is like a dream. Road Taxes, Insurance, fuel bills just kills you.

If one has bit of money in India, you can afford to keep maids working in your house, afford chauffeur driven car, one can go on long drives which i think in western countries we surely can't afford.

I truly feel its good to experience lifestyle in western countries, but for long run India is the best.

Happy coming Home :-)

Amit
No , Buying/Maintaining a car is cheaper in West and Middle East not sure about Europe though .
So beauty about India is that we can always find maids and house helps?
Regarding long drives western countries got better highways , cheaper fuel and comparatively well behaved drivers all in all better driving conditions .

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Originally Posted by dr.abhijeet View Post
Very Interesting thread.
To each his own, India may be best place to live for some of us but it was not my cup of tea.
We(me and my wife) left India just 3 years ago and the main reason was the rudeness , arrogance and general lack of respect for fellow humans.I am not saying that any place is perfect and certainly not US but for the most part these qualities do not affect my personal life here.
I can say this knowing what goes in the dark side of US. I am a physician in a hospital in west Baltimore.
Do I think of going back? NO.
Do I want my family here?YES.
So I am making sure they come here.I have realized you can live any where you want as long as you are with our loved ones, but if that place is civilized the experience of life becomes awesome.
This is how I explained to my mother : when I was in med school , she used to see me once every 6 months although we were i the same country, you will see me more frequently than that.
Professionally, I think this place gives you opportunity if you have the potential.
Things are wrong in USA as well, but I can live with them.

And quite surprisingly , I found India not that inexpensive when compared to just 3 years ago during my last visit.
Just noticed your says Ellicott City , I am also in Ellicott City , Charleston Manor. Do you work in John Hopkins by any chance?

Last edited by benbsb29 : 26th February 2013 at 20:41. Reason: Merging back-to-back posts. Plz use the Edit button if posting within 30 mins of previous post. Thanks.
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Old 26th February 2013, 20:37   #168
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Default Re: Returning to India

This is my general observation based on the people I have interacted with over the past some years. And it could certainly be wrong. I've noticed that folks who have stayed away from home earlier in their lives (stayed in hostels or worked in places far away from their native places) have an easier time settling down in a foreign land than those who have never stayed away from their homes. There will probably be a few exceptions but i'd be surprised if they are large enough in number to qualify more as a norm than exception.
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Old 26th February 2013, 20:45   #169
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No Buying/Maintaining a car is cheaper in West and Middle East not sure about Europe though .
So beauty about India is that we can always find maids and house helps?
Regarding long drives western countries got better highways , cheaper fuel and comparatively well behaved drivers all in all better driving conditions .
The beauty about staying in India is that its your own country and its advantages can only be experienced not explained. Can't say about Europe, but buying and maintaining a car in England is dam expensive when compared to the income.

Agreed.. there are far better motorways or autobahns in west, how many Indians who are staying in England can actually afford a decent car. Firstly getting a driving licence will set you back by 1,000 pounds.

West is too much of check box and follow the rules kinda of lifestyle, which is certainly not me . I find it too boring and depressing

Amit
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Old 26th February 2013, 20:53   #170
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Originally Posted by prashant.dinkar View Post
No , Buying/Maintaining a car is cheaper in West and Middle East not sure about Europe though .
So beauty about India is that we can always find maids and house helps?
Regarding long drives western countries got better highways , cheaper fuel and comparatively well behaved drivers all in all better driving conditions .


Just noticed your says Ellicott City , I am also in Ellicott City , Charleston Manor. Do you work in John Hopkins by any chance?
I am not in ellicott city any more , I have moved to Hanover and I work at St agnes although I have ongoing research at Hopkins. I used know someone who stayed at charleston manor.
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Old 26th February 2013, 20:59   #171
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This is my general observation based on the people I have interacted with over the past some years. And it could certainly be wrong. I've noticed that folks who have stayed away from home earlier in their lives (stayed in hostels or worked in places far away from their native places) have an easier time settling down in a foreign land than those who have never stayed away from their homes. There will probably be a few exceptions but i'd be surprised if they are large enough in number to qualify more as a norm than exception.
I was going to mention that, hostelers is a generalization but any self dependent individual who had to take care of themselves at an earlier age will find it easier to adjust away from home.
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Old 26th February 2013, 20:59   #172
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This is my general observation based on the people I have interacted with over the past some years. And it could certainly be wrong. I've noticed that folks who have stayed away from home earlier in their lives (stayed in hostels or worked in places far away from their native places) have an easier time settling down in a foreign land than those who have never stayed away from their homes. There will probably be a few exceptions but i'd be surprised if they are large enough in number to qualify more as a norm than exception.
I completely agree on this observation, In fact I am a big supporter of kids leaving home at a certain age for studies even if the institution is in the same city/town.
I am not saying that staying at home is useless and it certainly has its own advantages but living away from home, making your own mistakes and learning from them has its own sweet taste.
I am quite sure that it makes some one more fleixible and tolerant as well making it easier to settle any where.
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Old 26th February 2013, 21:01   #173
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This is my general observation based on the people I have interacted with over the past some years. And it could certainly be wrong. I've noticed that folks who have stayed away from home earlier in their lives (stayed in hostels or worked in places far away from their native places) have an easier time settling down in a foreign land than those who have never stayed away from their homes. There will probably be a few exceptions but i'd be surprised if they are large enough in number to qualify more as a norm than exception.
Maybe you're right, and I am probably an exception

I spent the first 21-22 years of my life in Thrissur, Kerala. Moved to Bangalore for 2 years (with the first job) and then moved to Singapore. For me, the move to Bangalore was quite difficult compared to the subsequent move abroad, maybe because the former was a real shift from the comfort zone.
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Old 26th February 2013, 23:14   #174
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Originally Posted by amitoj View Post
This is my general observation based on the people I have interacted with over the past some years. And it could certainly be wrong. I've noticed that folks who have stayed away from home earlier in their lives (stayed in hostels or worked in places far away from their native places) have an easier time settling down in a foreign land than those who have never stayed away from their homes. There will probably be a few exceptions but i'd be surprised if they are large enough in number to qualify more as a norm than exception.
I may be a glaring exception to this rule. Before leaving for US in 2007, I had never ever stayed away from my house (we are a joint family) and knew nothing of household chores. The combined 4-5 year stint in US taught me A-Z of living independently, and now I believe after a certain age everyone must experience living alone or outside of their comfort zone for an amount of time.
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Old 26th February 2013, 23:27   #175
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I was going to mention that, hostelers is a generalization but any self dependent individual who had to take care of themselves at an earlier age will find it easier to adjust away from home.
The people I have dealt with all had this as the common theme. But yes, what you have said is a more general way of putting this across.

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I completely agree on this observation, In fact I am a big supporter of kids leaving home at a certain age for studies even if the institution is in the same city/town.
Haha. You remind me of my dad!!

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Maybe you're right, and I am probably an exception
No you are not an exception. You stayed away from home for work before moving abroad. This is exactly what i had said too.

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I may be a glaring exception to this rule. Before leaving for US in 2007, I had never ever stayed away from my house (we are a joint family) and knew nothing of household chores. The combined 4-5 year stint in US taught me A-Z of living independently, and now I believe after a certain age everyone must experience living alone or outside of their comfort zone for an amount of time.
How old were you when you first stayed away from home?

Maybe I should modify my opinion to say that the earlier you get out of your comfort zone, the easier it becomes to move around later in your life.
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Old 27th February 2013, 00:02   #176
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I may be a glaring exception to this rule. Before leaving for US in 2007, I had never ever stayed away from my house (we are a joint family) and knew nothing of household chores. The combined 4-5 year stint in US taught me A-Z of living independently, and now I believe after a certain age everyone must experience living alone or outside of their comfort zone for an amount of time.
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Originally Posted by amitoj View Post
This is my general observation based on the people I have interacted with over the past some years. And it could certainly be wrong. I've noticed that folks who have stayed away from home earlier in their lives (stayed in hostels or worked in places far away from their native places) have an easier time settling down in a foreign land than those who have never stayed away from their homes. There will probably be a few exceptions but i'd be surprised if they are large enough in number to qualify more as a norm than exception.
Looks like we share similar life stories, Black Asta. I too came to USA in 2007.

I may be an exception too. I have never stayed away from my house (joint family) till i was 22 when i moved to USA 5 years ago. Started from zero and learned everything in last 5 years on how to survive in foreign land. I too believe, the earlier you are out of your comfort zone (home) the better you do in today's cut throat world.
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Old 27th February 2013, 07:42   #177
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Originally Posted by amitoj View Post
This is my general observation based on the people I have interacted with over the past some years. And it could certainly be wrong. I've noticed that folks who have stayed away from home earlier in their lives (stayed in hostels or worked in places far away from their native places) have an easier time settling down in a foreign land than those who have never stayed away from their homes. There will probably be a few exceptions but i'd be surprised if they are large enough in number to qualify more as a norm than exception.
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I completely agree on this observation, In fact I am a big supporter of kids leaving home at a certain age for studies even if the institution is in the same city/town.
+1. Key point you stress is the age part. I subscribe to that view too. As vb-san mentioned, 21-22 for an age to move out (work or higher studies) is a time by when one has kind of found his what I call "structure of daily routine". In other words he/she has found his comfort zone, which he does not want to change. If at it has to, it comes at a botheration or discomfort. But anyways its better late than never ! One can still learn !

At 17 when you go to a college hostel, the discomfort of staying away from family, is overshadowed by the aspect of new academic environment, new found freedom and friends. Hence it gets absorbed easily. And one starts learning the new lifestyle and rigours of routine, much more easily, due to younger age and also maturity of thoughts still getting structured.

Last edited by ampere : 27th February 2013 at 07:51.
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Old 27th February 2013, 08:44   #178
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How old were you when you first stayed away from home?
I was 24, the first time I left my parents home, and shifted directly to NJ. And I forgot to call home after I reached. In my defense, my family didn't have a phone, none in my street did. I was supposed to call a family friend who lived in the next street.

After 10 days I got a call via office that my parents are frantically looking for me. I had moved in with a colleague, so even TCS didn't know where I was for a few days. Only then I called and left a message to schedule a call with my parents. Yeah... that was another thing. I had to call at designated time so that my parents will be at the phonewalla house in the next street.

I was not really home sick since I have an open mind to adapt to new things. I say this because I had room mates who were extremely rigid and close minded. One room mate mostly ignored me because I didn't speak Telugu, and insisted on saying Girro (for Zero) and Jad (while I could easily switch to Zee).
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Old 27th February 2013, 09:34   #179
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How old were you when you first stayed away from home?

Maybe I should modify my opinion to say that the earlier you get out of your comfort zone, the easier it becomes to move around later in your life.
I was 22 when I moved out for the first time.

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Looks like we share similar life stories, Black Asta. I too came to USA in 2007.

I may be an exception too. I have never stayed away from my house (joint family) till i was 22 when i moved to USA 5 years ago. Started from zero and learned everything in last 5 years on how to survive in foreign land. I too believe, the earlier you are out of your comfort zone (home) the better you do in today's cut throat world.
eerie similarities!
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Old 27th February 2013, 19:18   #180
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I was 24, the first time I left my parents home, and shifted directly to NJ. And I forgot to call home after I reached..
Pretty much proves that even when you were living at home, you didn't depend upon family to take care of yourself. I had a similar incident when in school hostel. A matador carrying passengers from my school town to my home town had crashed, I was possibly going to go home that day but decided I won't. Read about the crash in news and forgot about it. A few hours later somebody from the town came on a bullet, took me to a place where there was a phone and had me talk to my parents who were frantically looking for a status.

And yes, even in my school most of us were like me, but there were always some kids who would be extremely home sick and shed tears every now and then. this was in 6th grade.
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