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Old 17th November 2011, 07:10   #31
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Default Re: Reclaiming my life - one day at a time

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Originally Posted by vivekiny2k View Post
You are confusing channelizing with maximizing. I might agree to write for a publishing house, but I would still not push myself to 16 hours (or until I break) workdays to "maximize" my output.

The keyword in C level comment was "aim". As they say, aim high. I am contesting the total effort one should spend aiming high.

I had no intentions to discuss what happens when (or if) I get there.
Got your point. Thanks Vivek!

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Originally Posted by trek View Post
As you already know, your diet is completely haywire. Since you have already taken steps to cut out the junk, I suggest you also consult a qualified nutritionist to chalk out a reasonable diet plan for you. There's a long gap between your breakfast and lunch which actually leads the body into starvation mode leading to more fat storage. As MileCruncher said, you need to have smaller meals at frequent intervals to rev up your metabolism rate.

Also, I will suggest you buy this book, the information will surely help you in your quest to reach a healthy body mass:

Don't Lose Your Mind Lose Your Weight - By Rujuta Diwekar

Flipkart.com: Don't Lose Your Mind Lose Your Weight: Book: Rujuta Diwekar (9788184001051)

Also, plain walking in the morning will not yield any benefits. Either you join a gymanisum and invest in a personal trainer for a few months or take up yoga classes.

Make it happen this time buddy, wish you good luck.
Thanks trek for the book recommendation and encouragement!



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Originally Posted by thoma View Post
I certainly feel that this is the right starter. Hope we all remember the famous acronym GIGO in computer literature. Garbage In Garbage Out. Our body is no different. Among Indians, there has been a drastic change in what goes into the body, than ancient times. Similar is the case with the way he tortures his body with scarce exercise. It is also sad that we get happy only by seeing another man unhappy.
....

It is equally good for you as well as others that you document your progress, and you document well. Wishing you all the best.
Some good observations there. Thanks for the support.


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Originally Posted by WindRide View Post
Got this as a fwd. Thought its appropriate here ...
....
It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem,
Thereís always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.
Absolutely brilliant! Thanks for sharing.
Here's Steven Covey making a similar point:
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Old 17th November 2011, 18:58   #32
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Default Re: Reclaiming my life - one day at a time

Friends, inviting your views on another aspect.
When you plan to inculcate a new habit like going for a 30 minute walk/jog everyday, you typically start with a goal in mind: let's say reducing 5 KGs in 10 months to reach the ideal weight for your height and build. The doubt that I have is when you reach the goal, do you stop the 30 minute walk/jog?

I mean, do you run these 'self-improvement initiatives' as "projects" or "operations"?
Should you have measurable goals for such things or 'just do it'?

Personally I believe that one should have a defined goal at the begining of such a journey (just like a "project"). Split that big goal and into smaller goals which could be targertted in the short to medium term and then track progress. So a series of small targets that lead into the big one.

Another part of me argues that - with goals, you always have the possibility of getting demotivated when the goal is not met. This happens. e.g. You hit the gym. After 3 months, you look the same and slowly the motivation starts to ebb out. After another month, you find it impossible to drag yourself out of the end early in the morning to go the gym.

Other way of doing this is in the "operations" mode, you just do it every day. Sort of like the wisdom from Bhagwat Geeta - "Karam karte jao, phal ki apeksha mat karo" (do your bit, don't worry about the outcome).

A hybird approach could be: don't worry about measurements and goals till sufficiently long duration, till it has become a habit.

How do you run your initiatives/transformation-journeys? Please share your views and experiences.
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Old 18th November 2011, 07:55   #33
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Default Re: Reclaiming my life - one day at a time

depends on whether you want your life to be a project or an operation.
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Old 18th November 2011, 10:07   #34
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Default Re: Reclaiming my life - one day at a time

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Originally Posted by SDP View Post
Other way of doing this is in the "operations" mode, you just do it every day. Sort of like the wisdom from Bhagwat Geeta - "Karam karte jao, phal ki apeksha mat karo" (do your bit, don't worry about the outcome).
As far as physical fitness is concerned, I feel that the "Bhagwat Geeta" approach is better for average Joes.

We need to change our thinking. Exercise should be made a part of your daily routine irrespective of whether one is overweight or not.

Regular exercise gives obvious benefits like loosing weight so that you can still fit into your clothes. But there are many other indirect benefits of regular exercise:
- Your stamina is increased, so you don't get tired while doing everyday things like climbing the stairs, doing household chores, playing with your kids, making love with your partner etc.
- Your immunity is increased, so you don't get sick very often (getting sick results in loss of productivity)
- You cholestrol/sugar/BP levels remain within limits and you can live a longer and healthier life. Also save on medical bills.
- A physically fit person oozes confidence, while an overweight person is always self-concious. This affects your progress in professional and social life.
- Regular exercise is also benefitial for your skin. Much more benefitial than those expensive anti-aging creams.

I would advise you to pay more attention in being regular with your exercise regimen and pay less attention to the tangible results. There are many more non-tangible benefits of regular exercise apart from loosing kilos and inches.

Rohan
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Old 18th November 2011, 10:57   #35
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Default Re: Reclaiming my life - one day at a time

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Originally Posted by vivekiny2k View Post
depends on whether you want your life to be a project or an operation.
I understand that Vivek. What I am trying to understand is what would you do? How have you been approaching the problem?

Quote:
Originally Posted by rohan_iitr View Post
As far as physical fitness is concerned, I feel that the "Bhagwat Geeta" approach is better for average Joes.

We need to change our thinking. Exercise should be made a part of your daily routine irrespective of whether one is overweight or not.

Regular exercise gives obvious benefits like loosing weight so that you can still fit into your clothes. But there are many other indirect benefits of regular exercise:
- Your stamina is increased, so you don't get tired while doing everyday things like climbing the stairs, doing household chores, playing with your kids, making love with your partner etc.
- Your immunity is increased, so you don't get sick very often (getting sick results in loss of productivity)
- You cholestrol/sugar/BP levels remain within limits and you can live a longer and healthier life. Also save on medical bills.
- A physically fit person oozes confidence, while an overweight person is always self-concious. This affects your progress in professional and social life.
- Regular exercise is also benefitial for your skin. Much more benefitial than those expensive anti-aging creams.

I would advise you to pay more attention in being regular with your exercise regimen and pay less attention to the tangible results. There are many more non-tangible benefits of regular exercise apart from loosing kilos and inches.

Rohan
Rohan, fantastic point of view.
Keep an eye on the goals (just as an input point for a course correction, if any), but don't be too much gung-ho only on the goals.

Last edited by SDP : 18th November 2011 at 11:01.
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Old 18th November 2011, 17:02   #36
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Default Re: Reclaiming my life - one day at a time

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Originally Posted by SDP View Post
I mean, do you run these 'self-improvement initiatives' as "projects" or "operations"?
Should you have measurable goals for such things or 'just do it'?
As per PMI, project has a specific start and end dates. Whereas healthy habits (maintenance) should be continued though your (product's) lifetime. So better treat it as an operation. If you want to add goals to be more focussed, set SLAs

Quote:
Originally Posted by vivekiny2k View Post
depends on whether you want your life to be a project or an operation.
Good one..

Last edited by Pallavi : 18th November 2011 at 17:03.
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Old 18th November 2011, 19:16   #37
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Default Re: Reclaiming my life - one day at a time

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Originally Posted by SDP View Post
I understand that Vivek. What I am trying to understand is what would you do? How have you been approaching the problem?
Personally I do not make it a chore. I love working out but if something more important comes up I give it a skip. Happens a lot when you have kids and pursuing part time MBA at the same time.

I have been blessed with good physique and habits in my genes and I am trying my best to pass them on (that's the toughest part). Which means I don't have to worry much about working out. But if I had to, I would just make it a part of my routine, and worry about goals or targets only if a red flag appears in my annual checkup.
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Old 19th November 2011, 22:00   #38
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Default Re: Reclaiming my life - one day at a time

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I tend to believe the later and that's where things start to look murky.
Thanks SDP for starting this thread man! I have been thinking of starting a thread along similar lines but never got the time to do so. I am exactly in the same state of mind as yours. Let me clear that I am not posting this to answer your questions because I too am in the same boat – I too, am looking for the answers to the same questions you have. Please bear with me as this is going to be a long post.

I would like to share my thoughts too. To give you a bit of background, I am from Bombay and stay in Goregaon. I did my schooling from here itself, went to KOTA to prepare for IIT JEE exams, managed to pass them, and take admission into IIT Bombay. As the process goes I took part in the placement process and managed to get a job in Bombay itself in Finance (I studied Civil Engineering btw).I am sure many of you like the Rancho of 3 Idiots will ask – If you wanted to go into finance why did you take Engineering? Well the answer is I do not know what I want to do in life. Sometimes I still wonder whether should I have taken a job related to civil engineering in the hope that probably that might make me happy. Of my friends circle in IIT most of them landed up in jobs which had no connection with what they studied in IIT.

My job – Junior Analyst in Equity research in a big investment bank. It’s been 5 months into the job now and this is my first job after passing out of IIT. My daily schedule: Get up at 6.50 am, perform all the daily chores, catch the 8.12 am local train to Bandra, and reach office by 9.00 am. I generally come home by 10.00 pm. So I spend approximately 12 hours in the office. I do not know whether this is good or not. In the first few months I was very happy – getting to learn a lot, nice colleagues, nice office, and good pay. I should be happy with my life right – good education, good job, good everything. But I was not. Workload at office was increasing. The past few months have been very hectic. There have been days where I had to be in office till 11.00 pm and then go to office at 9.00 am the very next day. I started getting frustrated in office. Sometimes I just did not want to go to office. Monday to Friday I was following this schedule like a Robot. On weekends I used to be so tired that I hardly used to go out. Plus there always used to be some kind of work or the other to do. I also had to prepare for the CFA exam which is due in December. I never really got the time to relax on weekends. I accepted this by telling myself that Life is meant to be hard – If you want to make it big in life, struggle is a must. Everyone was doing it so even I had to do it.

It is not that I hate my job. There have been days where I have loved my job and there have been days where I have hated it. This is the thing – I am never sure of what I want to do in life. Sometimes I like what I do, sometimes I don’t. I don’t really have a target in life like some people have. Am I the only one who does not know what to do in life? People say you should always do what you like. But what should a person like me do? Keep trying different things till I find the right thing for myself? Is this the right way to go about it? People around me keep telling me do MBA, give CAT. I am seriously sick of this CAT thing. I really do not want to study more at the moment. I have even stopped studying for my CFA exam because I really don’t feel like studying for it – I am not sure why and when did this happen.

In order to know more about this I started asking people around me what their plans in life were. Some were happy with their jobs. They will keep doing it until they get bored of it and then join another company. Some had plans of starting a business, a small start up. Some had joined their family business. Some were going abroad for further studies. When I used to hear people plan for their futures, I used to get worried. All of them were making plans for future and here I am – just sitting and doing nothing.

So here am I am – confused as always, scared of the uncertainty about my future. I too want to reclaim my life, do things which I really like doing but just don’t know how. Even I want to know is this what Life's all about - Struggling to be happy and eventually not being happy? Apologies for posting such a long reply but I had to get this thing out and share with someone.
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Old 20th November 2011, 01:17   #39
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Default Re: Reclaiming my life - one day at a time

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So here am I am Ė confused as always, scared of the uncertainty about my future. I too want to reclaim my life, do things which I really like doing but just donít know how. Even I want to know is this what Life's all about - Struggling to be happy and eventually not being happy? Apologies for posting such a long reply but I had to get this thing out and share with someone.
Interesting to read there. Well firstly, not many of the graduates these days are working in their field of graduation. So, you are not alone.
Here is a story of a guy who did Bsc in Chemistry and is now the VP in the IT department of a major ITES company. He has a very hectic job ( He needs to attend calls even at night). But at the end of the day, he gets paid, he is a VP in this well known MNC. Now, if after his graduation someone would have asked him about his future, the obvious reaction would have been to do something related to chemistry. He did not plan and thus is at this position.

My suggestion would be to sit back and think about the current job profile, Finance, and then think what would you like your life to be in the next 5 years realistically. Then, plan your schedule accordingly and execute them. The way you thought of getting into IIT and you worked hard for it and got it, similarly chalk out a life 5-7 years down the line. Take your time, talk to your seniors, superiors, have a look at what kind of profile they have and then think and take a decision. Life becomes monotonous when we start working and you hardly get time in the corporate world.
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Old 20th November 2011, 21:18   #40
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As per PMI, project has a specific start and end dates. Whereas healthy habits (maintenance) should be continued though your (product's) lifetime. So better treat it as an operation. If you want to add goals to be more focussed, set SLAs
Perfect! I like that approach.


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Originally Posted by vivekiny2k View Post
I have been blessed with good physique and habits in my genes and I am trying my best to pass them on (that's the toughest part). Which means I don't have to worry much about working out. But if I had to, I would just make it a part of my routine, and worry about goals or targets only if a red flag appears in my annual checkup.
Have seen your snaps in one of your travelogue (which covered Grand Canyon). You are really blessed with a good physique.
At the same time, may be you are underplaying your own effort to maintain that physique.


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Thanks SDP for starting this thread man! I have been thinking of starting a thread along similar lines but never got the time to do so. I am exactly in the same state of mind as yours. Let me clear that I am not posting this to answer your questions because I too am in the same boat Ė I too, am looking for the answers to the same questions you have.
Hey Saanil, I understand. It took me around 3 months to start this thread. Lot of people can not relate to this line of thinking and sometimes I really wonder if I am 'special' () in any way. I guess, anybody who can take a step back and see the big picture would have similar doubts. Started this thread so that a few like-minded people can come together, share ideas and search for solutions together.

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Originally Posted by Saanil View Post
It is not that I hate my job. There have been days where I have loved my job and there have been days where I have hated it. This is the thing Ė I am never sure of what I want to do in life. Sometimes I like what I do, sometimes I donít. I donít really have a target in life like some people have. Am I the only one who does not know what to do in life? People say you should always do what you like. But what should a person like me do? Keep trying different things till I find the right thing for myself? Is this the right way to go about it?
....
So here am I am Ė confused as always, scared of the uncertainty about my future. I too want to reclaim my life, do things which I really like doing but just donít know how. Even I want to know is this what Life's all about - Struggling to be happy and eventually not being happy? Apologies for posting such a long reply but I had to get this thing out and share with someone.
Precisely. They say follow your 'passion'. I am passionate about photography, I am passionate about travelling to places, I am passionate about driving. I genuinely wonder, would I ever be able to make ends meet if I follow these passions? I believe this problem would exist while the areas where one has skills and the areas about which one is passionate differ.

Thanks for sharing Saanil.
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Old 21st November 2011, 21:03   #41
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Update for last week:

1. Flawless week. No defaults. Went for brisk-walk and jog for 6 days in last week.
2. Slightly increased the jogging part in each round. Got a little bit of chest pain at the end of the short jog, but went away in next minute.
3. At the end of the walk, I just sit down and close my eyes for 4-5 minutes. Feels nice.
4. On Thursday, attended a one hour meditation session at work (part of a 4 week course).
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Old 22nd November 2011, 18:09   #42
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Fantastic thread. Looking forward for more from you SDP.
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Old 22nd November 2011, 18:39   #43
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SDP - Thank you for starting this thread. I felt that it was my story, seriously I can identify with you a 100%.

I love the way you've gone about analyzing the situation and the fact that you're trying your best to do something about it. Self realization is the first step, and I'm going to try my best to keep up with your pace on reclaiming your life.

BTW, this will not be the first time I've had the wisdom dawn on me, its happened numerous times before, so I sure hope I can stay committed this time round.

All the very best !!!
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Old 23rd November 2011, 14:22   #44
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Thanks chennai-Indian and Lalvaz.
---------------------------------------------
Being an email slave:

This happens to me quite often. Some of the e-mails that I receive during the day, I don't get to work on them during the day and I keep them unread. So there would be some which I haven't read at all and there would be some which I have seen and marked them as unread so that I can tackle the matter latter. Over a week or two, my inbox starts showing 500+ unread messages and tension starts building up. Many a times, just the thought that I have SO MANY things to attend to causes "paralysis" in the morning and more messages/to-do's pile up.

So yesterday, as part of reclaiming, kept a few hours aside and cleared up the mailbox. Brought it down from 800 odd to 17 by 7:00 PM yesterday. Felt relieved. Did not check mails after reaching home or early in the morning today. Was quite upbeat while heading to work today. Reached office, logged in and the inbox showed 68 unread mails.

I can not just chase emails, because in that case significant portion of the day gets spent in reading mails and no 'real' work gets done. I see a lot of such "email-slaves" around, who believe that clearing their mailbox 'is' the work that they get paid for . I don't want to be one of them.

Anyways, looks like defeating the email demon is going to take much more than one marathon session of cleaning up the mailbox.
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Old 23rd November 2011, 20:04   #45
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Default Re: Reclaiming my life - one day at a time

find out who is sending you these mails and ask them to consolidate. if there are junk mails, send them in appropriate folder. I get automated mails from my system which are routed a folder only to be looked at in case of a need.

learn how to give up. just don't retain mails so you would work on them later. in real life do you keep multiple things open to be worked upon?
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