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Old 28th August 2014, 10:13   #8446
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Default Re: The Official Joke thread

Arctic ocean missing from planet earth. Rumors are rajnikanth has accepted the ICE Bucket challenge.

Last edited by noopster : 28th August 2014 at 10:32. Reason: Removed the bold font tags
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Old 28th August 2014, 14:08   #8447
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Couldn't resist sharing this. Had me in splits in the middle of the afternoon.

All Bollywood lovers would appreciate this!

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Old 28th August 2014, 14:36   #8448
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A whatsapp forward I got:-
--------------------------------------
Incredible Bangalore :
Know the city!
1. If you throw a stone randomly in Bangalore, chances are, it will hit a dog or a software engineer. While the dog may or may not have a strap (a.k.a. leash) around his neck, the software engineer will definitely have one.
2. In India we drive on the left of the road. In Bangalore, we drive on what is left of the road.
3. From encyclopedia:
Bangalore: Official language(s) C++, java, perl, python
4. Q: What is the easiest way of causing traffic accidents in Bangalore?
A: Follow the traffic rules.
5. "A guy is house hunting in Bangalore. Meets old lady who is potential landlord. The conversation goes thus:
Old lady: Where do you work, son?
Guy (with an air of pompousness): I work in
Infosys.
Old lady: Oh, that bus company! Sorry, we rent only to good IT people. It would appear that Infosys operates more buses than BMTC in Bangalore."
6. Bangalore, where PG(Paying Guest) is the first business and IT, the second.
7. When someone says it is raining in Bangalore, be sure to ask them which area, which Main and which Cross.
8. If Bangalorean stops at a traffic light, others behind him stop too because The others conclude that he has spotted a policeman that
they themselves have not.
9. Bangalore is the only city where distance is measured in units of time.
10. Auto rickhsaw driver, grocery seller and common shop keeper thinks that you earn at least 1 lakh per month if you are in IT sector.
11. Out of every 100 software engineers in Bangalore, 90 are utterly frustrated and rest have a girlfriend.
12. Bus drivers use horn instead of brakes.
13. I quote : "Bangalore: The City where more people know Language "C" than Hindi.
14. Since it's easier to find an alcohol shop than a medicine shop in Bengaluru, the doctors
have now started prescribing "dawa-daaru" for treatment.
15.Universal answer in Bangalore is "Gothilla" - even if a bus conductor asks in kannada
"whether you're a girl or a boy when you enter from front door?"
16. The Bangalore airport is located in Andhra Pradesh.
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Old 28th August 2014, 15:41   #8449
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aneezan View Post
A whatsapp forward I got:-
I got the same one on whatsapp, except with Bangalore replaced with Pune!
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Old 28th August 2014, 16:08   #8450
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aneezan View Post
Auto rickhsaw driver, grocery seller and common shop keeper thinks that you earn at least 1 lakh per month if you are in IT sector.
More than these people mentioned above, It is the Traffic Policemen who thinks that all IT Engineers earn atleast a Lakh per month.
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Old 28th August 2014, 16:53   #8451
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aneezan View Post
A whatsapp forward I got:-
--------------------------------------
Incredible Bangalore :
-------SNIP------
Quote:
Originally Posted by W.A.G.7 View Post
I got the same one on whatsapp, except with Bangalore replaced with Pune!
Let me have the privilege (and the long lusted opportunity) to Condor someone!

You have been Condored - http://www.team-bhp.com/forum/shifti...hread-561.html (The Official Joke thread)
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Old 28th August 2014, 16:58   #8452
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Quote:
Originally Posted by saket77 View Post
Let me have the privilege (and the long lusted opportunity) to Condor someone!

You have been Condored - http://www.team-bhp.com/forum/shifti...hread-561.html (The Official Joke thread)
saket77, just when i thought I had posted a genuinely new "joke"!
Waiting for my opportunity!
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Old 28th August 2014, 17:52   #8453
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Default Re: The Official Joke thread

Anyone who thinks that they have a genuine, original joke should try it... on their grandparents!

(oh! Could I have just made a genuinely original joke?)
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Old 29th August 2014, 07:46   #8454
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Default Re: The Official Joke thread

I'm posting some old ones hoping I can escape from 'H4WK' eyes.



I'm sure many of you have seen that FIAT Ad. What's funny was the aftermath of the Ad. It was a great hit but there were lot of Meme's in internet. Such as,

"The cycle does better than the FIAT"

"In sales, Palio ended up just like that cycle from the Ad"

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Old 29th August 2014, 09:18   #8455
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A duck walked into a general store, waddled up to the counter and asked: "Got any peanuts?"
"No", said the assistant.

The following day the duck was back again, "Got any peanuts?"
"No", said the assistant firmly.

The next day duck came again, "Got any peanuts?"
"No", yelled the assistant. "I've told you we don't have any peanuts. If you come back in here again and ask for peanuts, I'll nail your webbed feet to the floor."

The next day the duck came in again and asked, "Got any nails?"
"No", said the assistant.
"Good. Got any peanuts?"
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Old 29th August 2014, 09:42   #8456
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Quote:
Originally Posted by W.A.G.7 View Post
I got the same one on whatsapp, except with Bangalore replaced with Pune!
So what they say in the message is true, The content has been localized for Punekars !!!

Cheers
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Old 29th August 2014, 16:05   #8457
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Saw this on FB. Couldn't resist posting. Hope this hasn't been shared earlier.
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Old 29th August 2014, 21:08   #8458
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Now that's original.
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Old 29th August 2014, 22:07   #8459
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Had to share this. Reminded me very appropriately of a moderators experience.


You know who you are,yeah.
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Old 30th August 2014, 07:52   #8460
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Anyone care for an ice bucket challenge with this!
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