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Old 10th August 2016, 10:11   #9541
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Who says girls can't drive ? .

ps: admin, in case this is shared before kindly delete the post.
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Old 16th August 2016, 07:47   #9542
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Dent

A blonde was driving home after a football game, and got caught in a really bad hailstorm. Her car was covered with dents, so the next day she took it to a repair shop. The shop owner saw that she was a blonde, so he decided to have some fun. He told her just to go home and blow into the tail pipe really hard, and all the dents would pop out. So, the blonde went home, got down on her hands and knees and started blowing into her car's tailpipe. Nothing happened. She blew a little harder, and still nothing happened.
Her roommate, another blonde, came home and said, "What are you doing?"
The first blonde told her how the repairman had instructed her to blow into the tailpipe in order to get all the dents to pop out. Her roommate rolled her eyes and said, ...
"HELLLLO" "You need to roll up the windows"
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Old 17th August 2016, 14:45   #9543
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Sharing as received, with edits to remove smileys:

Thousand Years ago..
people sacrificing their friends, family, fun, food, laughter, sleep & other joys of life were called "SANYASEES"

Now they are called "EMPLOYEES"

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Last edited by NPV : 17th August 2016 at 14:51.
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Old 18th August 2016, 09:52   #9544
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WHAT a comparison!
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Old 20th August 2016, 19:39   #9545
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5 germans in an Audi Quattro arrive at the Italian border.

The Italian Customs Officer stops them and tells them "It's a illegala to putta 5 people in a Quattro.

"Vot do you mean it's illegal?" asks the German driver.

"Quattro meansa four" replies the Italian official.

"Quattro is just ze name of zefokken automobile" the German says unbelievingly. "Look at ze dam papers: ze car is designed to karry 5persons"

"You canta pulla thata one on me!" replies the Italian customs officer. "Quattro meansa four. You have five-a people ina your car and you are thereforea breaking tha law."

The German driver replies angrily, "You idiot! Call your zupervisor over. I vant to speak to someone viz more intelligence!"

"Sorry" responds the Italian officer, "He can'ta come. He'sa busy witha 2guys in a Fiat Uno"

Last edited by Sebring : 20th August 2016 at 19:42. Reason: cut and paste is confusing
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Old 20th August 2016, 22:26   #9546
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You are hereby Condored! I am on mobile version right now so cannot track down the previous post of this joke.
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Old 20th August 2016, 22:41   #9547
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The Quattro joke has resurfaced many times since posted for the first time in 2005.
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Old 23rd August 2016, 15:25   #9548
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Now for our every search query Google has an option of viewing results in a local language other than the selected language.
So I was searching for "Pulp Fiction", a movie and see what Google thought I was searching if it was in my local language (Hindi)
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Last edited by Sherlocked : 23rd August 2016 at 15:29.
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Old 23rd August 2016, 16:17   #9549
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sherlocked View Post
Now for our every search query Google has an option of viewing results in a local language other than the selected language.
So I was searching for "Pulp Fiction", a movie and see what Google thought I was searching if it was in my local language (Hindi)
Jokes apart, Google is becoming increasingly unsafe, these things can actually put people in sticky situations very easily, especially at workplaces.

Pramod
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Old 23rd August 2016, 18:51   #9550
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sherlocked View Post
Now for our every search query Google has an option of viewing results in a local language other than the selected language.
So I was searching for "Pulp Fiction", a movie and see what Google thought I was searching if it was in my local language (Hindi)
Haha, nice one Truth be told, they are not wrong with the literal meaning!
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Old 24th August 2016, 12:37   #9551
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pramodkumar View Post
Jokes apart, Google is becoming increasingly unsafe, these things can actually put people in sticky situations very easily, especially at workplaces.

Pramod
I was about to mention the same thing. It would have been a sticky situation if google had made a few suggestions with photos of cover, when the boss or wife was looking over the shoulder
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Old 26th August 2016, 17:33   #9552
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Some of the comments here are

Funniest/Stupidest comments you have received about your Ferrari

Quote:
Many years before, when picking up a blind date at her home, as she walked to the car she asked "Is that one of those Testosterones?"
Quote:
A bunch of us out for a business dinner, doing the usual sharing photos of kids, last week's soccer practice, etc...

I showed a photo on my phone of my "kids" in the garage. A young woman in the group looked at it a bit confused for a second, and asked "what year is the mustang?" It took her all of a second, perhaps even less, to enlarge the photo, open her eyes really wide and say "Whoa! Wait a minute. That's not a mustang!" I don't think anyone else at the table heard, so no embarrassment, and she and I had a good chuckle about it.
Quote:
We had some friends over to watch a basketball game, so I ordered a couple of pizzas for pick-up at the local Pizza Guys. I know the owner well, so I asked that he put the pizzas in their heat insulation delivery bag to keep it warm and I'll return it the next morning. I drove to the place to pick up the order.

As I was walking out with the pizzas, a Charger SRT Hellcat was parked right next to my 360 Spider. The young man sitting in the car ask me why did I get a Ferrari instead of a Charger like his? Besides, with 485HP, it'll beat the pants off the Ferrari any time.

I said, "you will have to excuse me because I'm running late. The Ferrari is plenty fast in delivering pizzas". He stared at me in disbelief.
Quote:
Today While passing oncoming traffic after a red light, a 30ish women stuck her head out her window and screams "Sssweeet".

My 8 year old son riding shotgun asked me "what did she say?"

Me- "she said sweet, wonder what that means" (just being provocative).

Son- "maybe she licked the car when we were parked at the restaurant."
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Old 29th August 2016, 10:06   #9553
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nikhil.neon View Post
Simple explanation of a sophisticated mechanism
That was one great caption - and spot on!
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Old 29th August 2016, 10:26   #9554
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Old 29th August 2016, 12:10   #9555
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Lessons in English grammar:
Singular: If it's one, it's called a 'pothole'
Plural: If there are many, it's called 'statistics'
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