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Old 14th December 2013, 17:35   #856
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Default Re: Parenthood: Sharing the joy, precious moments, learnings and experiences

Guys,

We are expecting our first baby in the month of May'14.
I am currently staying in Chennai. However, want to have our baby in Hyderabad.
Looking for a good hospital around Dilshuknagar/ LB Nagar as Inlaws would be in Meerpet.
Pls suggest some good hospitals/ doctors who don't complicate things. I am not worried about the money. But looking for correct diagnosis.

Thanks in advance,
Maverick79.
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Old 16th December 2013, 14:55   #857
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Default Re: Parenthood: Sharing the joy, precious moments, learnings and experiences

My little girl is now 6 weeks old and time for Vaccinations!!

Can anyone tell me about the painless injections? Are they really painless?!
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Old 16th December 2013, 18:59   #858
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Default Re: Parenthood: Sharing the joy, precious moments, learnings and experiences

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Can anyone tell me about the painless injections? Are they really painless?!
Injections themselves are mostly painless, but "process" would still be uncomfortable, I.e. holding the child steady for injection.

Don't worry, child should be back to normal self in 5 minutes.
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Old 16th December 2013, 19:01   #859
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My little girl is now 6 weeks old and time for Vaccinations!!

Can anyone tell me about the painless injections? Are they really painless?!
the injection process is not painless, since there will be a needle (tiny one)inserted. However, the post effects of the injection, like pain,swelling fever will be lesser than the normal ones. I opted for the painless one and have suggested painless one to others too.
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Old 28th January 2014, 14:19   #860
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Default Re: Parenthood: Sharing the joy, precious moments, learnings and experiences

Hi all, we are desperately looking for a nanny in Bangalore since our current nanny will be out of action post this month because she has become a grandmother lately. My daughter is 1.2 years old and we are looking for a nanny and basic requirements are she should speak english and of course has experience in taking good care of babies. Any leads or references please reply or PM me. Thanks.
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Old 28th January 2014, 18:01   #861
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Default Re: Parenthood: Sharing the joy, precious moments, learnings and experiences

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My little girl is now 6 weeks old and time for Vaccinations!!
Do not blindly go with the vaccination list given my private hospitals. There are some expensive vaccinations, like Prevanar (costing around 12000), which are unproven and not really required - it's all driven by doctor/ hospital commissions. It is better to get the vaccination list from a government hospital and follow it at the private hospital.
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Old 29th January 2014, 12:35   #862
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Do not blindly go with the vaccination list given my private hospitals. There are some expensive vaccinations, like Prevanar (costing around 12000), which are unproven and not really required - it's all driven by doctor/ hospital commissions. It is better to get the vaccination list from a government hospital and follow it at the private hospital.
Thanks for this info. Will keep the above info in mind. So is it really not needed for a baby?
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Old 29th January 2014, 14:11   #863
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Thanks for this info. Will keep the above info in mind. So is it really not needed for a baby?
It is not required, as per another doctor - not well proven and recommended by doctors in private hospitals, for obvious reasons.
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Old 29th January 2014, 16:45   #864
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Default Re: Parenthood: Sharing the joy, precious moments, learnings and experiences

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Do not blindly go with the vaccination list given my private hospitals. There are some expensive vaccinations, like Prevanar (costing around 12000), which are unproven and not really required - it's all driven by doctor/ hospital commissions. It is better to get the vaccination list from a government hospital and follow it at the private hospital.
Disagree - go meet a pediatrician in the family.

We had a few elective vaccinations (IIRC) - Rotarix costing around 6k in three doses (AFAIK) and second was the Injectible polio vaccine (IPV) as part of Pentaxim. I doubt govt hospitals would recommend the IPV over the OPV - they would do the least possible. Even Max hospital (a large north indian chain) didnt recommend the rotavirus vaccine, which WHO recommends.

As parents who spend lakhs on depreciating assets (cars/trips etc) I don't think one second before any such vaccinations for our (only) kid. As long as something doesn't have a side effect (which a good pediatrician will tell you), who cares if it isnt fully effective (as long as its 100% safe)? I would anyday accept 70-80% over zero!

Last edited by phamilyman : 29th January 2014 at 16:51.
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Old 29th January 2014, 18:39   #865
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As parents who spend lakhs on depreciating assets (cars/trips etc) I don't think one second before any such vaccinations for our (only) kid. As long as something doesn't have a side effect (which a good pediatrician will tell you), who cares if it isnt fully effective (as long as its 100% safe)? I would anyday accept 70-80% over zero!
It is not as easy as zero benefits or 70-80% over zero. The side effects or true benefit of many of the new, and expensive vaccines are yet to be proven. A report on pneumonia vaccine, which has been promoted heavily by doctors here - http://articles.mercola.com/sites/ar...s.aspx?np=true

I stopped trusting doctors on face value long back. It is a big money making business, not truly driven by ethics. I am not saying that all doctors are bad, but my faith in the profession is decreasing day by day. So I take second opinion from doctors in my family, whom I can trust, and they have recommended to follow the default vaccination procedure, without extras.
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Old 29th January 2014, 22:50   #866
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Default Re: Parenthood: Sharing the joy, precious moments, learnings and experiences

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It is not as easy as zero benefits or 70-80% over zero. The side effects or true benefit of many of the new, and expensive vaccines are yet to be proven. A report on pneumonia vaccine, which has been promoted heavily by doctors here - http://articles.mercola.com/sites/ar...s.aspx?np=true

I stopped trusting doctors on face value long back. It is a big money making business, not truly driven by ethics. I am not saying that all doctors are bad, but my faith in the profession is decreasing day by day. So I take second opinion from doctors in my family, whom I can trust, and they have recommended to follow the default vaccination procedure, without extras.
Interesting.

So we are basically saying the same thing then!
Talk to a pediatrician in the family!

In my case, my BIL, whose himself a DM in immunology, advised me the above two vaccines (and got the same for his son of the same age). To each their trusted advisor!
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Old 31st January 2014, 16:42   #867
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Default Re: Parenthood: Sharing the joy, precious moments, learnings and experiences

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basic requirements are she should speak english and of course has experience in taking good care of babies. Any leads or references please reply or PM me. Thanks.
An English speaking Nanny would be very difficult to source. To be honest with you I have not seen any one in my vicinity who has an English speaking Nanny. The ones from South speak Kannada/Tamil mostly and if you manage to get some one from North then they speak Hindi.

Contact some of the high end agencies, they might guide you well. Good Luck.

Last edited by sam_boy : 31st January 2014 at 16:44.
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Old 31st January 2014, 18:07   #868
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Default Re: Parenthood: Sharing the joy, precious moments, learnings and experiences

Kids grow very fast. See below the my angle from her birth to 10 months. Her name is Samanyu Prabha.

On her day of Birth -
Parenthood: Sharing the joy, precious moments, learnings and experiences-20130329-10.43.54.jpg

10 months old now -

Parenthood: Sharing the joy, precious moments, learnings and experiences-csc_1104.jpg

Thanks
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Old 8th April 2014, 13:07   #869
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Default Re: Parenthood: Sharing the joy, precious moments, learnings and experiences

Saw this excellent reply on Quora and thought I'd share it here:

WHAT ARE SOME UNIQUE, EFFECTIVE WAYS TO DISCIPLINE A CHILD?

By Brian Davis, family man hacker caveman explorer

Stop treating your kid like a child.

No, really. I'm serious.

Our son started talking early and one of his first tricks was to parrot what we said and how we said it. I know that it sounds cute -- and it was in the beginning -- but mostly it was maddening. We quickly realized that traditional parenting is really, really condescending.

Don't believe me? Try this experiment with your significant other:
  1. Give seemingly arbitrary orders without any context or reasoning ("Don't touch that.")
  2. Ignore feedback ("Do you want to go to the park? No? Well, we're going to the park anyway.")
  3. Ask rhetorical questions in a passive-aggressive fashion ("Do big boys cry?")
  4. Respond to frustration with more orders ("Stop pouting.")
  5. Deny autonomy at every opportunity ("Let me do that for you. You'll hurt yourself.")
  6. Impose arbitrary punishments ("Keep that up and I'm taking away your car keys.")

Be serious about it, just as if you were talking to a child. If, after a week of this treatment, you and your significant other haven't had a at least one bitter argument, then you are either extremely lucky or already mired in a dysfunctional relationship.

So, how do you parent a child without treating them like a child? Here are some tricks that have worked for us:
  1. Explain yourself. Kids ask "Why?" so much because they genuinely want to learn. At some point, they stop asking... and it's generally because we stop giving them real answers.

    When a child questions your instructions, it's a great opportunity to teach. When you explain the reasons and context behind a rule, you're giving the child the tools to build their own moral framework, to fill in the blanks between the rules they know and the ones they don't. This is fundamental to learning.

    Offering an explanation is also a great opportunity for your own reflection. If you don't have a good reason for a rule ("Stop making faces."), it's probably a crappy rule and you're probably taking yourself too seriously.

  2. Ask them questions. Play this game: See how long of a conversation you can have with your child by only asking questions.

    At first you'll be surprised at how much they talk. Then you'll be surprised at how beautifully complex their minds actually are. And then you'll be surprised at how rewarding it is to really get to know your own kid.

    As for the child, they will love the fact that you care enough to ask about their day, about their feelings, about their preferences, about all the trivial little things that loom large in a child's mind.

    Asking questions is the single strongest signal you can send that you're listening, that you love them, and that you care what they think.

  3. Give them options. A lot of a child's frustration stems from having no choice in anything. A lot of your frustration stems from having to make lots of tiny, trivial decisions every day that drain your mental batteries.

    Delegate some of those decisions to your child and you can solve both problems at once. Your child gets to feel like an important, contributing member of the family because they got to pick out which beans to eat tonight. You get to make one less decision. Win-win.

    This, more than any other trick, nips conflict in the bud. The child owns the decision now. They have no injustice to protest. Our son eats all his vegetables because he picks out which ones to buy.

  4. Give them space. Speaking as an American, we tend to be too controlling of our kids, denying them the right to have their own initiative and to make their own mistakes.

    A child has to fall a lot before they learn to walk. And they have to trip a lot before they learn to run. By giving them the space to trip and fall -- to experiment and to fail -- you're helping them learn faster.

    Now, that doesn't mean that you should just let your kid wander into traffic in order to learn the importance of looking both ways before crossing, but we parents tend to confuse inconvenience for danger.

    A good rule of thumb is to ask yourself this: "If my child screws this up, will it cost more than $20 to fix, hurt more than a scraped knee, or take longer than an hour to clean up?" (Adjust according to your financial/emotional/time budget.)

  5. Practice defensive parenting. Remove sources of conflict before conflict arises and both parent and child will be much happier.

    In our case, that meant moving valuables up high, getting rid of lots of sharp stuff, and plastering the bottom 3 feet of our walls with butcher paper. Our son gets to draw on the walls without... you know... ruining our walls.

    We also got duplicates of things we couldn't replace or remove. He has his own books, his own pens, his own wallet. That way he doesn't go around "borrowing" ours all the time.

  6. Ask for help. Kids want to help. By doing everything for them, we infantilize them and lull them into a state of dependency. It's great, as a parent, to feel needed, but it's also exhausting.

    Free yourself.

    Ask for help washing dishes. Ask for help cracking eggs. Ask for help moving the furniture.

    As they get older, ask for help with things that are just at or above their developmental level. It challenges them and it gives them a powerful sense of belonging.

    Remember the first time your parents let you park the car? Remember how exhilarating that felt? That's how a 3 year old feels when you ask them to help you sweep the floor.

    Give them that gift as often as you can. You'll be surprised how much they'll want to help.

That's all I can think of off the top of my head (and this is already too long). In the end, treating a kid like a person prevents a parent from needing "discipline" at all.

Punishment, deprivation, praise, criticism, distraction, and a lot of the other things people on this page have recommended don't actually do much to teach your child good behavior. More often than not, they teach children to be retributive, praise-seeking, or distracted.

Ultimately, parenting is not about control. Kids aren't irrational beasts out to deprive you of patience and silence. They're little people in need of understanding and a helping hand. And when they get what they need they're usually pretty spectacular.

It takes practice and time to change your habits, but after a couple of months you'll be amazed at how self-policing your kid is. Good luck.
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R

Last edited by Rehaan : 8th April 2014 at 13:09.
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Old 8th April 2014, 15:14   #870
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Default Re: Parenthood: Sharing the joy, precious moments, learnings and experiences

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Saw this excellent reply on Quora and thought I'd share it here:
Thanks for sharing this Rehaan!

On a related note - http://www.huffingtonpost.com/bunmi-...b_5062838.html
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