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Old 11th February 2009, 18:59   #46
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Quote:
Originally Posted by amitoj View Post
One of the teams sitting next to us had moved. So, we were all moving into their vacated places, so that the entire team could sit next to each other. We were all busy moving our cabinets, chairs (with customised settings), CPUs and other personal effects, when we look up and see one of our teammates unplugging the landline phone. So, we asked him, "why are you doing that?"
His response: "I'm shifting the phone coz i dont want to change my phone number." :
Incidentally this is what you have to do if your have a VOIP phone.
When we shift places, you take your IP phone with you and plug it into the new location. Cause the number is tied to the phone , not the location.
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Old 11th February 2009, 20:31   #47
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fillmore View Post
Incidentally this is what you have to do if your have a VOIP phone.
When we shift places, you take your IP phone with you and plug it into the new location. Cause the number is tied to the phone , not the location.
It was the tata landline white phone!

And i will have to double check, but for VOIP phones, its the address assigned to the ethernet port that determines the number. Atleast thats how it is in our location

Last edited by amitoj : 11th February 2009 at 20:32.
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Old 11th February 2009, 20:59   #48
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Technocrat View Post
I believe its should be Gosht
Are you sure??

Life's like that: Real life anecdotes.-untitled-1.jpg
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Old 12th February 2009, 00:44   #49
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During my stint at a financial software firm back in 2002, an important release was made to a European site one eve. People were stretching out in their chairs after a long day and prompt came a response from the site that made the delivery manager come running and shouting "nobody goes home, hang on guys, we got big issues.. "
It trickled down slowly through heated discussion among the top brass that our release had stopped taking numerical inputs due to unforeseen errors, all alphabet characters were fine, simply no numbers at all, that's it.. and to speak of financial softwares..
So there were the guys, making fresh builds and trying to reason out all possible things that a desktop environment in Europe can have in it different.. simply no clues, someone talks of unicode and international language implementations and how we had been too lax in our efforts to have ensured such a disaster, it was anyway waiting to happen, sooner or later and blah blah..
It is past 11 into the night, nobody had had the time to think of or the guts to utter dinner also and the delivery manager is walking back, swearing his choicest best; no solution yet, nobody is in a hurry to be seen looking up as well, the situation is not very promising and one of us later on confided that all he was doing was thinking of his last month's payslip, bug was nowhere near to getting resolved anyhow!
Then, suddenly the cloud was all over, clear in one shot, the guy verifying the package on-site had the numpad on his keyboard off!!




Bike ride to Ooty from Bangalore, in what initially started as a same day return plan to Mysore. We were caught by a bad downpour halfway to Mysore and ultimately when the rains showed no signs of ceasing, it only coaxed four adament young fellows on two bikes into going past their planned destination and heading out as far as they could before sunset. So we managed to cross Bandipur forest reserve and headed to Masinaguddy a little further off where we had friends.
The ride in the rain had taken the toll and after we discovered that the resort dogs had emptied the bowl of chicken we so painstakingly prepared during the 5 minutes of washing up before dinner ritual, it was like make up with the dark liquid and hit the bed, no hope of catching up with anything in the meal category.. however, we had to park the bikes into the verandahs of the cottages at all costs.. so the CBZ was put into one cottage verandah and then we realized that the then fitted rear crash guards on my bullet were proving a little too wide for the entrance into the cottages. Anyhow, we managed to somehow squeeze the bullet in and all things taken care of, dived into the beds.
Late next morning, we get all ready to catch up on some breakfast on the way to Ooty, hunger was rolling storms in our stomachs and to our utter disbelief, no matter how much we try from all angles, the bullet would just not squeeze out of that opening again.. lot of tries with sane minds and ultimately decided that I no longer needed those rear crash-guards anymore!




This one happened to a cousin of my friend. The day had been clear, not hot at all and just right for a relaxed scooter ride on the highway out of the sleepy town in Assam. One could have smelt the recently burnt grass on the paddy fields, on both sides of the road, the road running a little elevated from the fields. So our dear bhai is riding down in a relaxed mood, no vehicle in sight, the entire road, both sides entirely to himself.. he must have been a little too careless trying to sniff the blowing wind, the next moment he finds himself on the road, after a few tumbles, fortunately nothing much bad happened. Scooter is some distance behind, lying on the side in the middle of the road after what seemed to have been a pretty bad skid.. and a column of cows.. err.. one of them cow and the rest 5-6 of them bulls, disappearing fast into the horizon on the other side paddy field..

Cheers!
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Old 12th February 2009, 13:53   #50
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24th Dec 1998

My heavily pregnant wife and I visit the doctor - "Go enjoy Xmas and see you in the new year" says the doc.

Later that evening, all my folks from the UK are over for dinner, lots of fine wine and good food, my wife slogged hard despite her condition. After dinner coffee is being served, suddenly - someone decides it is time to join the party!

Alert doctor and rush to hospital and I am instructed to time the contractions.

Noted as follows : 11.00, 11.20. 11.15, 11.25

Doctor declares me too drunk and tired, sends me home assuring me, I will not miss the action. Someone gets to sleep

She is not amused

25th morning


Someone barely slept. House is a mess after a wild party. Got at 6.00 am to the hospital. Hold her hand and time contractions accurately ,coach her on the lamaze breathing.

Am worried about the state of the house, I go and ring up and enquire with my cousin who is cleaning up and also to check for messages.

"Where were you?"
Remembering what I did last "checking for messages"

She is not amused

Into the delivery room

Doctor asks "have you thought of a name?"

I joke " Being today, maybe Jess or Jessy"

The doctor is checking the scalpels - I make a joke about using it to carve Xmas lunch

Writhing in pain

She is not amused

10.02 - my daughter appears

Am sent with the nurse and the baby to bathe her and collect clothes

I give clothes to the nurse and pass the ward where my mother inlaw awaits and we hear a scream from the delivery room

I run - I see the OT nurse slumped on top of my wife, the doc is calmly stitching her her. The OT nurse fainted and fell on top of my wife. conversation goes like this:

"Do you mind if your husband carries her?"

No alternative so my wife says "ok"

I pick up the nurse and no idea what to do with her. Doc says, put her down near the corner - the floor is clean.

I put her down.

"Nearly finished, go get a wheelchair!"

I run out - my mother in law is wondering what is happening and seeing me whizz around.

I appear with the wheelchair.

Doc has finished. I decide to help my wife off.

"leave her alone, pick that nurse up and put her in the wheelchair"

Turning to my wife - "You can walk to your room, I'll hold your drip"

It looked a real sight to my mother in law, I am walking out wheeling a nurse, my wife is walking after an ordeal to the ward.

Suffering a sleepless night, a lot of pain, a lot of stiches and made to walk after that

She was not amused

Last edited by ajmat : 12th February 2009 at 13:54.
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Old 12th February 2009, 14:14   #51
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ROFLMAO!! Ajit, that was too good man!
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Old 12th February 2009, 14:22   #52
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Great thread...
Anyways, this happened with me a few months ago. My LHD Fiat was freshly painted and I decided to take her out for a drive in the evening around the Five Gardens area.

As I am driving, freeflow et all, a cop passes by me and looks behind. I ignore him and continue driving. A few minuites later, as I am driving on the main road outside 5G's, suddenl i see a naka bandi outside one of the gardens
.
Now, i have been staying in that same area for 21 years and I have NEVER seen a nakabandi there. Apparently they were catching people for not wearing their helmets inside Parsi colony.

So one cop runs on the road, And stands right in front of me. I slowly move to the left of the road and stop. One Inspector comes up to me and asks for my lisence/papers,etc.

After i show him the odcuments, he says, "Abhi tum Rs.500 ka fine bharo aur jao." I am startled, "Why??" i ask him. "Boss, Thumne muffler silencer modify kiya hai."

Now, i got irritated and decide to get even with hum for wasting my time. So i begin.

"Aap ne kabhi Fiat gaadi suna hai?" So he says yes. "Aap ne kabhi Fiat Gaadi Dekha Hai?"
So He says yes.

"Aap ne kabhi Left Hand Drive Fiat Gaadi Dekha hai?"
So he says no. So I say.

"Agar aap ne Kabi Left Hand Drive Fiat Gaadi Dekha Nahi, To apne kabhi suna bhi nai hoga!!"
So he syas yes.

So i tell him, "Kabhi dekha nahi, suna nahi to aap kaise bol sakte hai kee maine Muffler modify kiya hai?"
So now he was absolutely confused.

Now he spots the rollcage.
So he says, "yeh pipe kya hai??"

So i tell him,Woh bombay mai bahut garmi hai aur gaddi mein AC nahi, Toh woh udhar se shower ka pani aata hai!!"

The guy gets soo Confused, he just let me go.
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Old 12th February 2009, 14:36   #53
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OMG!! Cyrus, that was hilarious.
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Old 12th February 2009, 14:37   #54
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This happened to me today morning. I had to take my bike instead of walking to office, as i got late due to a con call that went on too long.

I have a Goa registered CBZ which i use in Bangalore(yes all LTT paid )

On the extreme LHS of the rear number plate is written on a blue background:

G
O
A

As usual the cop stops me. Checks all documents. Gives me a go ahead. I am keeping the docs back into my backpack. The cop says pointing at my number plate.

"Government Of...?"

I complete "Arunachal Pradesh"

Ahh... he says convinced with a smile. I start my bike and ride off. I couldnt stop laughing until i reached office.

This after he checked all my papers. Now you know what they check for..

PS: Tomorrow i walk to office.

Last edited by Spitfire : 12th February 2009 at 14:38.
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Old 12th February 2009, 14:39   #55
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cyrus43 View Post
So i tell him,Woh bombay mai bahut garmi hai aur gaddi mein AC nahi, Toh woh udhar se shower ka pani aata hai!!"
The best modification that can done to a roll-cage.
Would really like to take a shower in your car!
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Old 12th February 2009, 14:47   #56
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LOL! That was good Cyrus! But what I'm interested in hearing is the conversation that happened every time you stuck a car at the Autocar Show last November! Those must have been real gems!
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Old 12th February 2009, 15:44   #57
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Here is a true incident from my office, happened two years ago. My friend took the initiative to remind the HR and our colleagues regarding a salary hike. Here is the mail he sent.
------------
Dear Madam

This is to bring to your kind notice that 2 months back all the first batch of TRAINEE XXXX (XXXX BATCH) were assured of getting a hike in salary from the month of september -2007 during a meeting conducted by Dr.XXX, P.YYYY & Mrs.GGGG.
Kindly check out with the concerned people and do let us know about any initiatives taken by the management.

Thanks & Regards
Leader (Bali Bakra)

-----------------------------------

So he sent this format to all his batchmates/colleagues; so that inturn they had to send it to the HR (after some required changes) as a group initiative. He sent it, they sent it........ the next day he sends a mail..

"PLEASE REMOVE MY NAME UNDER THANKS AND REGARDS PUT UR NAME
PEOPLE ARE SENDING UNDER MY NAME PLZ STOP THAT."

Poor guy, the HR called him up and asked why people are sending HR mails signed by him.
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Old 25th May 2010, 19:19   #58
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This incident happened three months back when I was driving home late from a client meeting in my dad's Skoda Laura (last numbers 8008). A juvenile cop riding a bike with an armed cop on pillion overtook me and waived at me so as to bring me to a halt near E-Square Cinema under the flyover.

I banked left and stopped. Lowered the window. The young cop got down. Asked me where I was coming from and where I was going and checked my driving license. He then pulled out a shiny new BlackBerry and entered the vehicles registration number. He then scuffled back to his mate...

Young Cop: Arre! Salaa! Yeh toh chal raha hain abhi? Toh woh doosri gaadi ko check kiya toh kyon nahin chal raha tha?
Armed Cop: Arre! Yeh gaadi ka antenna bahut powerful hain lagta. Lagech signal pakad liya...!!!
Young Cop: Saab aap jao kuch nahin routine check tha!

What the armed cop meant was that the BlackBerry was working because of a powerful radio antenna on the car. The signals were stronger because of the cars antenna
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Old 26th May 2010, 00:18   #59
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inreverse,

that was hilarious.

K
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Old 26th May 2010, 00:39   #60
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Wow. Real gems here. I'm never able to recall any such incident.

Here goes mine. Happened a few days back, so still fresh.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------
We've got a new microwave-a convection. My dad gets an idea that potato snacks will taste good if baked. He puts the metal tray and the stuff in the microwave. Turns it on. Sparks appear.

Microwave is turned off. Tension is in the air. Why is a new product sparking ? He takes a deep breath, gathers courage, and decides to give it one more try.

Sparks again. Algorithm is repeated. The air is saturated with tension. Not finding anything else to say, my dad decides the sparks are caused by lack of cleanliness. Starts ranting and shouting about no one bothering to clean the thing, and the sparks being caused by some leftover food particle.

Well, the microwave is cleaned, and dad decides to give it another shot. Sparks.

And then he says, " Let's try the convection mode !!!!! "
------------------------------------------------------------------

If you didn't get it, he was supposed to be using the convection mode in the first place. A steel tray is used while baking, and metal causes spark in the microwave mode. And my dad's supposed to be an engineer. lol.
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