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Old 4th May 2009, 12:52   #1
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Talking How much do People actually know about India???

In most of my travel and stints ovreseas like most Indians, I am surprised by the lack of knowledge of India by the foreigners.It does make me laugh at times but also does raise the blood temperature too. This one is about how they sometimes bring a smile to your face.
Something I got as a forward :

The answers are actual responses to the questions posted on a website by Foreigners planning a visit to India

Q: Does it ever get windy in India ? I have never seen it rain on TV, how do the plants grow? ( UK ).
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.

Q: Will I be able to see elephants in the street? ( USA )
A: Depends how much you’ve been drinking.

Q: I want to walk from Delhi to Goa - can I follow the railroad tracks? ( Sweden )
A: Sure, it’s only three thousand kms, take lots of water.

Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in India ? ( Sweden )
A: So it’s true what they say about Swedes.

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in India ? Can you send me a list of them in Delhi , Chennai, Calcutta and Bangalore ? ( UK )
A: What did your last slave die of?

Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in India ? ( USA )
A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe . In-di-a is that big triangle in the middle of the Pacific & Indian Ocean which does not.. oh forget it. …… Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Goa . Come naked.

Q: Which direction is North in India ? ( USA )
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we’ll send the rest of the directions.

Q: Can I bring cutlery into India ? ( UK )
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

Q: Can you send me the Indiana Pacers matches schedule? ( France )
A: Indiana is a state in the Unites States of…oh forget it. Sure, the Indiana Pacers matches are played every Tuesday night in Goa , straight after the hippo races. Come naked.

Q: Can I wear high heels in India ? ( UK )
A: You’re a British politician, right?

Q: Are there supermarkets in Bangalore , and is milk available all year round? ( Germany )
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers. Milk is illegal.

Q: Please send a list of all doctors in India who can dispense rattlesnake serum. ( USA )
A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from. All Indian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.

Q: Do you have perfume in India ? ( France )
A: No, WE don’t stink.

Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in India ? ( USA )
A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.

Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in India ? ( France )
A: Only at Christmas.

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA )
A: Yes, but you’ll have to learn it first.

Q: Can I see Taj Mahal anytime? ( Italy )
A: As long as you are not blind, you can see it anytime.

Q: Do you have Toilet paper? ( USA )
A: No, we use sand paper. (we have different grades)
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Old 4th May 2009, 12:59   #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by iceman91 View Post
Q: Do you have Toilet paper? ( USA )
A: No, we use sand paper. (we have different grades)
Icing on the cake !!
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Old 4th May 2009, 13:02   #3
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One of my colleagues had come to India from the USA. After she went back, her mom asked: Are they really really poor ? Do they have Mc'Donalds there ?
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Old 4th May 2009, 13:12   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by iceman91 View Post
Q: Will I be able to see elephants in the street? ( USA )
Actually, I did see an elephant on the streets of Bangalore yesterday! Must be quite a shock for an American. How would you react if you found Bush & Cheney wandering about on Brigade road?
And the sandpaper one. Priceless. I know some people who might even take this seriously. After all they expect to see sadhus lying on beds of nails at every street corner.
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Old 4th May 2009, 13:16   #5
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To answer your question - Not a lot!

A consultant was supposed to be arriiving at our facility for a couple of months 2 years ago. I was his single point of contact. While preparing for his trip, he asked me the following questions -

1) Do you have a plotter (a printing machine to print anything above A0 sizes)
2) Do you guys wear turbans?
3) Are there enough precautions in case of animal attacks? I have heard from my colleagues that there a lot of tigers and lions roaming around...Bengal tiger if I remember correctly
4) Can I commute in something bigger than the yellow and black vehicle (Auto-rickshaw)?

When he left us after 2 months, he narrated me a story of Vivekananda (surprised to know he knew him). Here is the link to that story Vivekananda Lecture - Why we differ
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Old 4th May 2009, 13:48   #6
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Q: Will I be able to see elephants in the street? ( USA )
I belive answer to this question should have been, "I am afraid not any more, Elephants are out of roads due to stricter emission norms from Government"

Q: Are there supermarkets in Bangalore , and is milk available all year round? ( Germany )
I believe answer to this question should have been, "Sorry we dont store them at supermarket, we prefer drinking it straight from natural containers"

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Old 4th May 2009, 13:56   #7
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Tell them to watch this. The Story of India.
Part 1 -
Part 2 -
Part 3 -
Part 4 -
Part 5 -
Part 6 - BBC The Story of India: Part 6: Freedom and Liberation | Free Educational Videos - Watch Educational Videos Online | Veoh
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Old 4th May 2009, 14:56   #8
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Man, I had food just now and it all out laughing. So whens the guy coming for the Hippo race?
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Old 4th May 2009, 15:01   #9
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Dinar the race has been postponed due to the elections. Most are campaigning
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Old 4th May 2009, 15:20   #10
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If you want to see Elephants head to Vikas marg during noon time, I often see elephants there(not joking!)
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Old 4th May 2009, 15:38   #11
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Quote:
Q: Will I be able to see elephants in the street? ( USA )
A: Depends how much you’ve been drinking.
All those who think that's a stupid question, I will narrate one incident that happened in my previous organization

We had a client from US who was visiting us, as usual we took him out for Lunch.

During Lunch

US Guy- Hey I have heard that one can see elephant on streets here

Project Manager - Oh No that doesnt happen here, it does in some small towns but not in big cities

US Guy - Oh thats Bad I was really hoping to see one & had promised my Son that I will bring him a picture of one on streets

After Lunch we head towards the parking & right outside the Restaurant's compund we see An Elephant

The Client was very happy & my PM was findinga place to hide or better disappear
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Old 4th May 2009, 15:43   #12
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Yet to finish reading the post. Awesome. lol
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Old 4th May 2009, 16:23   #13
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Everyone at work loved this and I just wanna watch that Hippo race.

@iceman let us know when its rescheduled:-)
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Old 4th May 2009, 16:32   #14
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Obviously a foreigner will be amused to see an Elephant on the streets, how many times do they see such a scene on their streets? Actually even I was amused when I've seen some Camels on Bangalore roads. Cause I had never seen a Camel before.
And don't get angry if foreigners ask these stupid questions, even Indians asks similar questions to fellow Indians if that second person happens to be from a remote place. Have been in such situations and my answers normally follows the same line as the first post

BTW, that hippo race answer is just awesome, ROFL.
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Old 4th May 2009, 16:36   #15
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guys actually speaking on friday a friend and me were driving to mysore and near srirangapatna actually saw two elephants being trucked!! one elephant in each truck.

Later on near nanjangud we saw a few guys walking with Indian flags and were thinking its some campaign, to our utter amazement we saw a stark naked man leading them!!! it was some form of protest.


HIPPO race will keep you updated, right now trying to figure out the different classes/categories for them to participate.
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