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|12th June 2009, 13:32||#1|
Ramblings : The Story of a dreamer
Well i hope this is permitted in here because i sure would not want to break any rules
Anyways many years back when i had the time to doodle and let my mind wander onto strange lands, i used to write; sometimes happiness and love used to flow and at times evil and darkness...
these are some of them and please note that all words are mine and are completely fictitious.
all comments/criticisms are welcome
|12th June 2009, 13:34||#2|
Lets start off with "Demonknight" a character i write about; this is one of his stories...
Dance of the Dead
For long has it been whispered amongst necromancers and other beings dabbling in the dark arts of black magic and sorcery about the dance of the dead…a dance unseen by mortal eyes, a dance which shakes the realm to the core for the dead who dance are the forsaken ones…heaven cast them down even before their soul could depart from their lifeless carcass and hell shoved them up with violent force for such was their evilness that hell would be heaven for these beings of darkness…and so these souls of black roam the barren wilderness of mortal realm spreading disease and lurking behind every act of sin perpetrated by mortals…and thus their numbers grow in strength with the passing of each virgin’s journey into lust…
And on the night of the 13th full moon it has been said by legends of old that the forsaken ones gather in all their numbers at a place unknown to ordinary mortals but the sorcerers, they know of the place…they stay afar from that place on the night of the full moon for legend has it that any being of mortal blood who does dare to be in that gathering of evil, will be chained in thorns and feasted upon by ravens and vultures and who’s blood shall quench the earth’s eternal thirst…
However legend also speaks of one man…many millennia ago when Lucifer reigned in Hell and when the earth was but a land of desolation and chaos, one mortal sorcerer of the light in his quest to fight the forces of the night did stumble upon the unholy gathering of the dead…
“bright was the night under the unholy aura of a full moon, strange it would seem that it was the 13th full moon and alone was I wandering across civilizations on a quest to seek wisdom that will aid me against the eternal battles with the creatures of the night when fate itself intervened and amidst the cover of the night in the barren wastes of the valley of the dead I stumbled upon an unholy gathering…a gathering of the forsaken ones…at first sight I could not believe my eyes as my mind tried to comprehend the scene before my eyes…then when the unwanted ones started to utter ancient spells of the night I realized the veritable evilness that was unfolding before me…the spells wreaked havoc across the plains and I saw beings of grotesque shapes and forms…I was playing host to sights that were not meant for mortal eyes…it was as if the dead had risen from their graves…and then they spotted me and even before I could utter a scream they were upon me and they then chained me to a tree…cast numerous spells on me did they but to their shock and mine, none did have an effect on me…then the ground shook and the clouds struck lightning upon the earth and amidst the thunder did a voice speak… ‘o ye dead ones, ye hath chained the One, He who hath been spoken of in the prophecy of old, He who shalt rule over Hell, He who shalt become the demon supreme’ thusly did the voice speak and in the loud silence that ensued I found myself getting stronger as fresh blood started flowing through my veins and one word did I speak and free was I of the chains and banished were the dead…they had their dance…now its my turn”
And thusly did the DemonKnight come to be…amidst thunder, lightning and the dead!
|12th June 2009, 13:35||#3|
and to balance it out here's a poem i penned down
Numerous are the tears that I have cried
And numerous are the times that I have smiled
Numerous are the paths that I have walked
And numerous are the words that I have talked
Numerous are the promises that I have made
And numerous are the burdens that I have weighed
Numerous are the people I have met
And numerous are the times that have I seen the sun set
Numerous are the mountains that I have climbed
And numerous are the wisdoms that I have imbibed
Numerous are the oceans in which I have drowned
And numerous are the people who have at me frowned
Numerous are the prayers that I have prayed
And numerous are the times that they have failed
Numerous are the times that I have been lost and found
And numerous are the times when I have wondered if of mental health I’m sound
Numerous are the times when I have woken up to the dawn sun
And numerous are the times when sins I have done
Numerous are the tears that I have cried
And numerous are the times that I have died
Numerous are the women I have known
But none as womanly woman as u, heaven’s loan
|12th June 2009, 17:02||#5|
Distinguished - BHPian
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Mumbai (but wat
Thanked: 1,454 Times
I read your "Dance of the Dead" and though sorcery and occult are not matters of my interest, I was intrigued by your powerful beginning.
However it takes great courage to write a story that speaks of legends.
I won't touch the content, but your punctuation is pretty bad. It is difficult to read.
You choose to use "..." constantly and that cause greater confusion. In fact even on regular posts on Team-BHP it is frowned upon. I would definitely increase spaces and focus on punctuation.
The DemonKnight seems like an inspired character. Do you have any real stories that are longer?
The poem was not special, sorry.
Last edited by Sam Kapasi : 12th June 2009 at 17:04.
|12th June 2009, 18:53||#6|
whoa someone replied?!
Thanks for your words dude. Shall look into the punctuation part a bit more carefully hereon.
and no need to be sorry dude, these are just words and sometimes they come out special and sometimes they don't.
i do have more demonknight stories which i shall post in here. but some of them i cannot post in here because they might be blasphemous.
well anyway here's one more
|12th June 2009, 19:08||#7|
There I was, just another jobless man walking aimlessly along the crowded streets filled with all sorts of life and strife. Seeking what I do not know but walking onwards am I seemingly trying to drown myself in the sea of humanity…humanity…inhumanity would be a much better word to describe what we are today...the inhumans!
Looking at things around me with a lazy gaze I try in vain not to notice the sad plight of those around me talking on their cell phones with laptop in hand bumping into shoulders of even more people doing the same. Is this what we are meant to be doing? If yes then why are we not happy and if (I shudder) not then who have we angered and when will come the day of reckoning for all of us who strayed onto paths never meant to be walked upon while deserting the chosen path; the chosen path of good and evil while poles apart in their similarities are interweaving with shocking rapidness in these days and I cant help but be afraid.
Thunder strikes as a loud boom echoes through the skies onto realms below and I cover my ears to save them from the deafening pain. As the roar subsides I lift my gaze onto skies that were but blue moments back and darkness is all there is to see now.
Lightning flashes ripping through the darkness like a sword cutting through mortal flesh and envelops the world in an eerie glow, making us all look like zombies, reminding me of a Wes Craven movie.
The cell phone talkers have all but stopped talking and suddenly everything becomes so silent I can hear an ant walking over a dead leaf!
Curiosity overcomes purpose and everyone pauses to wonder just what it is that is going on and they look at each others faces hoping to get answers. With none forthcoming a feeling of dread and impending doom fills the air stifling me and I realize the day I hoped would not dawn had dawned indeed. I fall down to my knees and pray for mercy. I pray to the one wearing the thorn crown for forgiveness and I pray for salvation, for it is the day, the day of reckoning for all mankind!
I get up and run wild pushing through the crowd amidst angry glares and curses…I run…I run hoping to escape from the evil that is on its way to reap our sinful souls…I run wanting to get away from the massacre that I know will soon happen for if the prophecies are true then mankind is doomed today!
”the clear blue skies shall be as night and thunder shall strike fear in the hearts of men and lightning shall herald the arrival of the dark lord the ultimate warrior the warlord of blood the wielder of the infernal sword ‘bloodlust’…the DemonKnight!
That day shall be mankind’s last breath on mortal realm as the skies shall rain fire and the seas shall be of blood as all sinners are slain by the burning armies of hell as they slaughter all mortals and the DemonKnight shall stand tall amidst a pile of cadavers and a river of flesh and blood”
Hearing that makes me run all the more faster. Why do I run? I don’t know. All I know is that when He comes no matter where I hide or how fast I run it is pointless for His gaze is all seeing and His sword is never forgiving. But still I run like the coward I am.
I run for my own worthless pitiful life.
Then with a roar that stops the heart He breaks through the dark clouds, on Cerberus the Hound of Hell with the undead horde behind Him, one scarier than the next. My feet freeze and in awe do I stand dreading mankind’s judgment day. Tall as the clouds and strong as the mountains He stands and roars:
"Filthy mortals the time for remorse hath passed ye by like a fair maiden’s virginity…ye hath sinned and once sinned ye are sinners for all eternity and the only place left for you is down in the burning pits of Hell! Prepare mortals to meet your doom!”
Saying so He slashes His mighty sword and hundreds lie at His feet in all forms of mutilation. With a battle cry heard across all worlds He orders His demonic forces to ravage and slaughter. Mortal eyes have never seen such a massacre as the annihilation was ruthless and unforgiving. The streets flooded with blood as torn limbs floated only to be devoured by the Hounds of Hell…women were ravished with unholy seed and slaughtered…men were cut into pieces…it was like being in a nightmarish abattoir…earth had become a slaughterhouse where Hell’s forces chose the best portions to devour!
Even Heaven turned a blind eye to the death of the Creator’s creation as nothing could save them from the Annihilator’s annihilation. The battle raged on for days without end as hell spilled itself onto mortal realm.
Then as suddenly as it began so did it end.
I thank the Lord for His mercy and forgiveness but then I realize there was no one else around to join me in prayer. It was then that I realized I was not forgiven by the Lord. I was but spared by the DemonKnight so that I may write of these days for ye all to read.
I close my eyes and pray for salvation when I hear a growl before me. I open my eyes only to see the blood-stained sword of the DemonKnight ‘bloodlust’ come down on me!
written almost 7 years back while i was still in college funny when i read it after all these years . And please none of this is supposed to be taken seriously.
Last edited by deathwalkr : 12th June 2009 at 19:12.
|13th June 2009, 01:40||#8|
Join Date: Oct 2008
Thanked: 93 Times
It must have taken a certain amount of courage to put up your work. I admire that.
I do not feel that I am qualified to comment upon another persons work, but will tell you this: the imagery in the demonknight stories is powerful.
Perhaps your prose should flow a little easy.
|13th June 2009, 09:25||#9|
see that's my problem. i do not even know what "prose" is
thanks for your words dude and i am no literary expert either; just another guy writing down his thoughts whilst sitting bored in class or in the hostel alone on a Sunday;
|13th June 2009, 09:34||#10|
How well does this excuse for a poem hold up?
DAYS GONE BY
i walk, feeling the soft caresses of the ocean beneath my feet
a lone figure, i hug myself as i watch the sun set on a crimson sky
as a tear rolls down my face, my mind wanders onto memories sweet
memories of days gone by, memories of happiness, memories...memories of you and i
days gone by,days when you were with me
days gone by,days when i was all you wanted to see
days gone by,days when love was all we needed
days gone by,days when you were all i needed
the soft whisper of the sea awakens me to the present
and with a tearful eye i gaze at a seagull soaring high
high above the ocean and it flies to me like a messenger god sent
and again she soars and i cant help but wish with you again i could fly
days gone by,days when you used to hold me tight in your arms
days gone by,days when we sowed the seeds of love in our very own farn
days gone by,days when you used to whsiper sweet nothings in my ears
days gone by,days when you were my life for all these years
silent is the night and scared am i for i'm but all alone
the darkness, she embraces me in her arms like a blanket
i sigh thinking about all those years and the quirks and twists life has thrown
and under a starlit sky i think about the day we first met
days gone by,days when you said the sun and stars rise in my eyes
days gone by,days when i believed all your sweet little lies
days gone by,days when we used to hold hands and walk many a mile
days gone by,days when all that mattered to me was your smile
as i watch the stars dancing on the waves, i hear a soft voice calling out to me
and as strong hands encircle me i lean back and i sigh
i turn around, drown in those familiar eyes,run my fingers through grey white hair and i whisper softly "kiss me"
and as we kissed a tear of joy rolled down my face for i realized that my dream had come true;my dream to grow old with the one i love...you.
Last edited by deathwalkr : 13th June 2009 at 09:35.
|14th June 2009, 00:33||#11|
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Thanked: 93 Times
|11th February 2011, 17:59||#13|
Re: Ramblings : The Story of a dreamer
Well it's been a mighty long time since i posted anything in here. I just plain forgot
Anyway, here is another glimpse into my twisted mind
Many a year has gone by
Since this tale has been told, no one knows why
Listen to my words mortals
To this tale, that speaks of mankind's dark wells
Long ago many a year back
When light ruled this world of black
Mankind walked with a smile on their faces
Little did they know they were to be ruled by darkness
Under the tree of evil in the dark forest
Did he find it, that which will put mankind forever to rest
It was but a book, how could this be harmful he pondered
Fool he was for in his hands did he hold the Book Of The Dead
He opened the book with not a thought
For it was it's contents that he sought
He started chanting from the ancient tome
Never realizing he has but ensured mankind's doom
A voice inside his demented head implores him to stop
But that voice is just a whisper now as he continues without stop
Having chanted the ancient verse he finally stops, trembling & bathed in sweat
When he feels the ground shake, he realizes what a blow he has dealt
Just like a demon's eye
A red moon was dancing on the blackened sky
The rivers and oceans became as blood
As the skies let fall a rain of blood
Demons chained in prisons unknown
Break free and seeds of destruction were thus sown
Mankind flee in terror, running through every known path
In vain did they flee for none could escape the demons wrath
Their pitiful cries for help fell on deaf ears
As the Gods themselves look the other way in fear
Bodies lay scattered as the demons feast
Mankind cries "who hath set free these beasts?'
He hides in a cave and deciphers the ancient book
With a roar he shouts the words aloud; that was all it took
And the demons scream as they return to their eternal prison
Mankind or whats left of it arise to the dawn of a new sun
So mankind's darkest hour came to end
And the Gods swore, against all evil, they will help defend
Years have gone by and mankind has all but forgotten
Of that day in 1432 when slain were a million women, men and children
What you ask ever happened to the fool who was responsible for the slaughter
He was punished for eternity by the Gods, that whenever mankind seems to falter
He would remind them of the massacre so it may not be repeated again
So he roams the earth telling the tale and if you would take it to heart, I wouldnt be punished in vain .
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