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Old 16th June 2009, 14:43   #76
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Originally Posted by rsjaurr View Post
there should be some signs of use of force in the form of some bruises but not if it was consensual.
If Media reports are to be believed (HT). There are scratch/struggle marks on the victim's body.
The reporter was heard saying "These marks are a testimony to the non-consensuality of the act" (or something similar).
OT: I know some people who prefer them otherwise as well
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Old 16th June 2009, 14:44   #77
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I don't think this requires any apology. We already have had enough moral policing by political parties and it definitely is not required here on tbhp. Unlike media we are not passing any verdict here. I believe that anything and everything happening around us can be and should be debated. Turning a blind eye is not a solution to any issue. We have discussed everything from "which air conditioner to buy" to "racism in Australia" and there is no reason why this topic should be treated differently.
I don't know why but this reminds of one interview of Ram jethmalani where the journalist tries to play moral police and Mr. Jethmalani bashes him saying that "preservation of the purity of judicial process and particularly the criminal justice system is of the greatest national importance otherwise one day you will be in jail and no one will be there to defend you".
The point that he is making is not about the justice system but the fact that if we try to alter the democratic fabric of the socity then one day we might end up as victims and there will be no one to raise a voice for us.

Last edited by huntrz : 16th June 2009 at 14:48. Reason: hyperlink
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Old 16th June 2009, 14:52   #78
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Can we have something like, such threads should be active for 10 days at the most, where most members or members who want to contribute get a chance to do so.
Contribute, rave, rant, tear, crib, shock, in the 10 days and then the thread gets deleted and back to cars and basic intent again
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Old 16th June 2009, 14:54   #79
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Originally Posted by prince_pervez View Post
the thread gets deleted and back to cars and basic intent again
PP, I think the basic intent of the shifting gears section is to prove that there is a lot more than just 4 wheels that bind us together.
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Old 16th June 2009, 15:10   #80
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Originally Posted by Sam Kapasi View Post
PP, I think the basic intent of the shifting gears section is to prove that there is a lot more than just 4 wheels that bind us together.
+1
Eggjactly, hence a separate section too - Around the Corner>Shifting Gears PP.
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Old 16th June 2009, 15:15   #81
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Sam, an apology from you, a person who has infinite skills to bring out the finer aspects of life (overseen by most of us) through your writings, is in fact embarrassing to us and me in particular as I must have triggered it (my last post). But somehow the subject in this thread did not deserve your honouring it with your writing
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Old 16th June 2009, 18:01   #82
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Sam no need to apologies but after reading your initial post and lots of other posts I do not understand why the act being with maid should have more shock value then the act being consensual or non-consensual ?

Is there an inherent assumption that a maid can never be desirable women / girl or the class divide is so deep that perversion and depravity of man can never overcome it ?


One thing is proven that we have such a deep class divide in our minds.

Though no-one probably here has seen the maid but even if we assume she is quite unrefined and ugly people have their own fetish and it is not necessary for a women to be good-looking or of higher class to get raped.

Also the mentality of rapist is never normal , It is quite impossible for a normal male to do the act against wish of the women.
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Old 16th June 2009, 18:21   #83
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I can never digest the unilateral nature of a rape allegation. I know there isnt a perfect solution but is still rankles.
what happens when two people do it by consent and one day the lady decides to level charges? invariably, the guy the shaft and no matter what is 'proven' in court, the slur never goes away.

note: this is a rant about the nature of a rape allegation. I am NOT taking any sides but throwing an open ended question.
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Old 16th June 2009, 18:47   #84
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There are many babas and self proclaimed (living) gods in our country, never will they condemn publicly that these kind of acts or corruption or lawlessness or communal riots. Only when everything is peaceful in the morning that they are willing to shout merrily.And when the corrupt politicians, sick celebrities visit them, these horrible creatures merrily 'bless' them--sh*t on such sainty scoundrels.

Whether it is a maid or co-worker or some common soul,any act of disturbing their modesty is quite in-human.The doer must be burried in sand with mid summer heat and tons of red ants feeding on the brute.
Who the hell cares for this ahuja,there are many more unfortunate females molested in all places of the country in one way or other. When some one gets away with one such thing, it emboldens others when they are about to do even bad acts. Wrong is wrong, there is nothing small or big or a mistake-- punishment must be severe for even smallest ones ,that shall take care that bigger ones will not occur.

Last edited by deetee : 16th June 2009 at 18:48.
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Old 16th June 2009, 19:11   #85
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Quote:
Originally Posted by deetee View Post
The doer must be burried in sand with mid summer heat and tons of red ants feeding on the brute.
.
.
.
punishment must be severe for even smallest ones ,that shall take care that bigger ones will not occur.
come on man, we are a democracy with a sound legal system, not taliban.

and punishment shuld be ensured even for smallest cases. severity alone is not a deterrent good enough. every offense should be registered, heard and recorded forever in once history if convicted. that's a good deterrent.
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Old 16th June 2009, 19:59   #86
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Originally Posted by Sam Kapasi View Post
lol, You're keeping track of my birthday? Yes, I'm totally looking forward to it. My first birthday with Jenny.
Totally OT but had to reply to Sam. Sirjee, you are in my friends list on Orkut and you have enabled the "Birthday" indicator. That's why!!!
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Old 16th June 2009, 20:31   #87
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Originally Posted by Sam Kapasi View Post
lol, You're keeping track of my birthday? Yes, I'm totally looking forward to it. My first birthday with Jenny.

For those, who are challenged reading between the lines, here is the translation:

"This is my first birthday with Jenny and that is why I am so keen on celebrating it. So, all the bozos, wishing to walk in and spoil my party, better understand that, they are most unwelcome."
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Old 16th June 2009, 21:23   #88
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This headlines today is one THE worst news channels in india. well after star news and all.
most of their show's are pathetic. The journalists don't show any professionalism.
They are more of a "we make shows for TRP's" channel.
they should take Que's from NDTV and CNBC18.
don't always believe HT. They tend to exaggerate a lot
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Old 17th June 2009, 00:15   #89
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sam Kapasi View Post
.......

............
Makes no sense to me at all. What a crying shame.
I share your bewilderment and rightful wrath.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sam Kapasi View Post
........
I've also read the criticism about starting this thread.
........
I apologise.
...........
I was shocked and surprised at his admittance. I could think of nowhere else to go and no one else to discuss the news openly with.

............
@ Sam,

Love you man for seeking to have a sane discussion on a subject that is clearly unfathomable.

The criticism is uncalled for. One cannot wish away the evils of society by turning a blind eye to them. In this day and age one cannot have moral policing - that too on a discussion.

Your first post is unambiguous - you have stated that you cannot comprehend the act and have roundly condemned it. "What a crying shame".

To my mind, (correct me if I am wrong), you were seeking answers to the question - why a man with a wife he thinks is a gift from god would stray from the straight and narrow and cheat on her. You have condemned the husband for his waywardness. Whether it was the maid or anyone else and, whether it was rape or consensual are immaterial. There is therefore no scope of criticism and no need for you to apologise.


I request all members to stick to the point(s) raised by Sam in his first post. They are points worth discussing and debating fearlessly.

Sam, with his keen sensitivities has spotted issues that are deeper than the obvious, delve deep into human nature and have philosophical and moral implications. I was always an admirer of Sam's posts, with this thread, my respect for him grows.

Cheers,
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Old 17th June 2009, 17:27   #90
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Finally I am drawn into the discussion by the post above..

I feel that the discussions mainly are on the assumption that all men are similar. There are agressive men who are not themselves sometimes under the influence of alcohol. Now generally smart wives guage their men quite well in terms of their sexuality and would definitely pre-empt situations like in this particular case, where the guy is left alone with the maid for days together ( info as per newsreports is that Mr Shiny has tried to be fresh with the victim on the previous two days too). I pity his wife who now has to defend him while internally being in turmoil over her husband's cheating on her.

Last edited by emkay456 : 17th June 2009 at 17:28.
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