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Old 17th March 2010, 15:37   #76
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Originally Posted by alpha1 View Post

Gansan, Next what: thought police?
Perish the thought! As I had mentioned earlier, I am not judging morality or decency. I was merely pointing out the risks of exceeding "normally accepted behaviour" in public places, and was just advocating discretion. What is taboo now may be common place a decade from now, and people who are pioneers and ahead of their time always face hardships, don't you think so?

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Originally Posted by e1t1bet View Post
One of the crucial elements of democracy is to make sure that individual rights do not get eroded because of what the majority thinks.
The same thing that happened with article 377 recently. It doesn't matter what the majority thinks. The constitution is there to protect an individual's rights, regardless of whether the majority is for or against it.
But unfortunately that is the way the world (at least ours) works; "The winner takes all, and the loser goes to the wall". The law will come to the rescue of the couple, but only after the episode. If they go to the law before hand and seek protection for what they are about to indulge in public, guess what will happen?!

My friend, you are stating what should ideally happen, I am merely holding up a mirror to predict what will happen! But things will change, we are getting there, just not yet!

Last edited by Gansan : 17th March 2010 at 15:39.
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Old 17th March 2010, 15:40   #77
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Originally Posted by e1t1bet View Post
One of the crucial elements of democracy is to make sure that individual rights do not get eroded because of what the majority thinks.
The same thing that happened with article 377 recently. It doesn't matter what the majority thinks. The constitution is there to protect an individual's rights, regardless of whether the majority is for or against it.

I agree with you completely vigilante justice should be abolished by all means,

I will narrate a small such incedance from my life. I and my wife studied in the same college, our college used to close every day at 4 pm and her hostel used to close by 6pm, we used to have a evening tea and by 5 we used to go for a small walk those days, since the time was limited our walks used to be around 3km radius. there was a meter guage track bang opposite to our college, and some days our walk used to be in circles and we used to cross the track several times. One such day both of us were having our evening walk and i had sore eyes, The time was around 5:45 and we were walking fast so that i can see her off and go to my hostel. I see a group of girls from a factory, one such girl turns around and looks at us couple of times, i told my wife about her and she said even she noticed her. This girls suddenly starts running, soon when we cross a nearby colony i see a lot of men gathered around. One guy yells at us asking us to stop.

I stop and i ask my wife to walk, she walsk then the guy asks her to stop as well. I told my wife to ignore it and walk, soon the guys are running towards us, so she stops and walks towards me. One guy comes to me and asks, why are we roaming around here, i said we are going to the hostel as we study in the college near by. So he says are you in love, i said its none of his business, he gets little angry and starts yelling at me, I used to go to the nearby gym, so i knew the so called roudy of that place as he was a junior at the gym. So i said i know him, if you have any questions about me you can ask him.

Immediately these guys cool down and one sane guy walks upto me and says recently a couple commited suicide on these tracks(which was plane BS), so if we are facing any problems they are ready to help us. These were bunch of morons who sit whole day and do nothing. I asked them to wait. I called that roudy guy from my pnone who was near by, in the mean time asked my wife to go the hostel. This guy comes up in no time. Tells everyone i am a know guy and i mean no problem.

The crowd disperses. What if another couple who knew no one gets caught, i usually dont have such people in contact list, but i guess some times such things also helps. I later learned this roudy's own brother killed himself on these tracks.

The point is till the time we belive vigilante justice is right, things will go wrong, we should never let this so called mob decide what is culturaly right and what is not.

Or else we will face situations like what happened in UP during valantines day last year.

Pramod
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Old 17th March 2010, 15:52   #78
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Its a little sad/weird that its ok to stop for black cats crossing your path, or publicly expressing racial/community biases, or even accepting 'extra' income as something that comes with the territory, including in front of children, but its not ok to express affection towards those whom you're not only naturally inclined to, but correct from any angle as far as healthy relationships go, have affection towards.

Showing murders on the screen, or getting into a scuffle after a minor mishap on the road are alright for our kids to witness, apparently. But the horrid, decadent sight of two people who are in love (that wretched emotion) holding hands, or being physically close in other forms - now thats something to completely avoid knowledge of.

Pretty screwed up, if you ask me. No wonder so many young men have a rather skewed take on relationships which are rarely balanced, or account for the other's sensitivities.
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Old 17th March 2010, 15:52   #79
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gosh, didn't know this thread existed. well have to agree to all/most of the responses and they are logical. so i think we cannot approve or disapprove this. for the safer side, disapprove!!
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Old 17th March 2010, 16:05   #80
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Originally Posted by Gansan View Post

But unfortunately that is the way the world (at least ours) works; "The winner takes all, and the loser goes to the wall". The law will come to the rescue of the couple, but only after the episode. If they go to the law before hand and seek protection for what they are about to indulge in public, guess what will happen?!

My friend, you are stating what should ideally happen, I am merely holding up a mirror to predict what will happen! But things will change, we are getting there, just not yet!
I am sorry, I didn't get your point earlier. Of course, the reality is that lunatics exist among us in large numbers. And I would normally suggest someone who doesn't have contacts, unlike in Pramod's case, to be rather safe than sorry. And as it has been mentioned, the lunatics would go after your neck even if you are walking with a woman maintaining perfect decency.

P.S. However, my point really was that we should not condone such acts by mobs. It is about time that our educated politicians (and there are quite a few of them), do a crackdown on such groups (whether the groups are organized or not).

@Pramod and others who have been in such situations: A lot of these men seem to have a problem with women in general. A lot of them don't think twice before using a denigrating word for a woman (specifically wh*r* in different languages) if they see one smoking, or drinking, or dressed in a Western outfit.
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Old 17th March 2010, 16:57   #81
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Originally Posted by akaushik View Post
Initially I thought , it is personal digital assistant (PDA) But I dont know about thane in Delhi there are many gardens like
The missing punctuation between "thane" and "in delhi" had me reading it in one go as "thane in delhi"

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Last year, I went down on a business trip from pune to mumbai. I thought I seen it all till I came across a person with a goat on the tracks near Kalyan.
This is like unbelievable . What's the superlative for Pervert?
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Old 17th March 2010, 17:31   #82
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Reading the title i thought Shivsena or MNS or other so called moral police groups are invading team-bhp, i was scared.

Kidding apart PDA is a common thing if you stay around Delhi and most people do not mind it now. Buddha garden etc are famous for it. People who feel it is right may indulge or watch it and people who don't can just walk off,whose stopping them?

But telling someone what is right or wrong is incorrect. Noone is a kid here. Everyone knows what they are doing.
Moreover this topic will be beaten to death without an outcome so lets just enjoy the talk

Btw 6 pages in quick time, we guys do have opinion about anything and everything!
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Old 17th March 2010, 18:02   #83
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Originally Posted by harry10 View Post
..
Btw 6 pages in quick time, we guys do have opinion about anything and everything!
Exactly- i was thinking the same- man this HAS to be a record breaking thread for the number of replies/views in a day! Me too contributing now
Has anyone paid attention to the "public display" on the TV daily? Grandpa, son and grandson, with whole family watches Rakhi gyrating or some other scantily glad damsel dance to a bollywood number, what about that???
I guess we are a strange lot indeed, sometimes i feel hypocrites( too strong a word but that's just MY opinion)
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Old 17th March 2010, 18:24   #84
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Default Welcome to India

Now here is the flip side of the situation.

http://www.team-bhp.com/forum/shifti...on-places.html (Is it proper for couples to show Public Display of Affection(PDA) in common places)
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Old 17th March 2010, 19:28   #85
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Exactly- i was thinking the same- man this HAS to be a record breaking thread for the number of replies/views in a day! Me too contributing now
No no.... that record is held by another EPIC thread!

http://www.team-bhp.com/forum/indian...r-7-speed.html (LOL! Mkt Head Ferrari claims Indian Octavia with Quad cam,Turbo,Supercharger,7 Speed)

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The utter nonsense in these claims does not even need any further discussion. Not only was this the fastest growing thread in Team-BHP (26 pages in 24 hours), but all your befitting replies have surely shown the world that you cannot try to misguide Team-BHPians and get away with it.
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Old 17th March 2010, 19:29   #86
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Wow this thread is a Hot favorite among Bhpian's
In India As mentioned by others If a Woman Wears what she likes (well we love it too ladies) People assume that she is easy and do crappy stuff like following her teasing her etc.

Ill narrate 2 incidents which happened one to me and another to my friend.
I don't smoke(neither do i drink).
This other day two of the girls in my class wanted to have a smoke near the local fairly isolated cigarette shop. First they tried to buy the smokes themselves but all the people when they approached the shop started giving them "The look" i could sense the tension building up there with people ready to take things into their hands.
they obviously were afraid and came back.
At that time Yours truly was close by.
They asked me if i could buy them a smoke etc so i did and did the courtesy of dropping them home in my car also allowing them to smoke.
The point is that the general mass is either fulled with perverts or Highly insecure people.



another incident
My friend and his Girlfriend were traveling through some fairly residential area in Bangalore(don't remember where)
At that time His car's Tyre punctured.They obviously had to stop close to some house and since it was dark he took a fair amount of time to change the spare.
seeing the car close to his house a so called "responsible citizen" called the cops without even investigating the situation and told the cops that a couple is getting cozy in a car.

To my friends bad luck.
he just finished and got into the car and was about to leave at that time the cops came in.
They started talking all nonsense about the girl and then after lots of persuasion by my friend and his Girl Friend. The cops realized that they were students .
But they were not satisfied yet. They took their parents phone numbers and gave them a call and started talking about the event in their view.

Now another Event that occurred.
This was in the Hebbal Garden's Near Hebbal Lake.
there were some guests who had come in from out of town. My dad asked me to take them to Lal bagh and show them the place etc.
But it was already 5 pm and i knew that by the time i reached it would have been closed so i did the mistake of taking them to hebbal lake.
we went in, where ever we saw a shade/shrub or any hidden place i could see couples making out.
It was actually funny when i moved a small bush while walking through and realized a couple was sitting on the floor with a piece of news paper below them.
Luckily my guests were not upset with this but they were rather amused at how desperate people are in Bangalore(They were a family of 4 from kerala) !!!

Last edited by vinaydas : 17th March 2010 at 19:31.
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Old 17th March 2010, 19:36   #87
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Talking of kids, if they grow up seeing their parents casually displaying their affection (to each other ), they will not ask such questions. Ditto with wearing western dresses, bathing suits or even nudity (in european countries). It just becomes a part of life. The worst outcome of it is when they try to do the same to the neighbor's kids. But as others mentioned, shielding them from the world is not a solution to the problem. And once you have raised a good generation, they will feel no need to get a kick out of an unusually long smooch (or more) in a public park.

I have a feeling once protests against Valentine's day and police/society aggression on couples are taken care of, all these activities will move to where they belong. I am sure if these couples had an option to hang out together in a private place safely, they won't resort to such measures. Getting a kick out of PDA is another factor and there are venues to exercise that too, they just need to be available. From what I have seen, any kind of adult only entertainment (I don't mean XXX) faces strong opposition from our moral police. Either people don't understand what it is, or what it's for, or sometimes try to barge in with kids.


Of topic, I am raising my children in a country where they can get depressed when they can't get a date in kindergarten. This society teaches them the value of a relationship from the childhood and so it never gets awkward. Now it has it's own downsides but that's for a different thread altogether.
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Old 17th March 2010, 19:49   #88
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Now people are displaying their Mobile Phones, infact they flaunt it

our next generation might be comfortable flaunting PDA

Leaving the PUN behind,

i think what is right and what is not so right is to be left to the individual preference. When more and more individuals decide to display thier affection in a casual way in public then it will be more tolerated.
when majority (>50%) of the people engage in PDA, then it will be a socially acceptable behaviour.
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Old 18th March 2010, 10:34   #89
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Is it not ironic that an educated woman smoking a cigarette is held in contempt as thousands of women working low end menial jobs enjoy their beedi's.

Anyways, I wish they all quit.
Men and Women included.
Cigarettes KILL.
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