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Old 26th May 2008, 16:22   #31
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Waiting with bated breath.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Sam Kapasi View Post
Suddenly everything is going in slow motion.
The next post should not be in slow motion !!!
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Old 26th May 2008, 16:23   #32
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What a place to stop the narration. There goes that email I have to send to a client. All I'd be doing is refresh this page hoping for the next episode
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Old 26th May 2008, 16:48   #33
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Default The Yeti, The RX and the Bus

As I'm hurtling sideways towards the bus, there is a strange ease and calm in my head. I turn and stare at the bus.

I decide to jump.

Mustering up all my courage, I leap forward, towards the front wheel, jumping as hard as I can. My eyes are clenched tightly shut. I'm brave but not that brave. I just want to live. I hear the thud of my helmet banging against the road. There are a variety of sounds, screaming metal, hot fumes and much more.
I am also conscious that I am hurt in a few places.

I open my eyes and look up. I am staring up at a horrified bus driver who has opened his door and is staring down at me. He looks really scared and shocked.
I turn towards my outstretched right arm, to my horror it is a few centimetres away from the largest tyre I have seen in my life. I snatch my arm up reflexively.


Meanwhile Whacko is staring at the scene with horror in his mirror. He has already slammed on his brakes and come to a halt right there, a few metres away.

I sit up. I feel faint. My knee and ankle are throbbing very badly. My hands are shaking and I cannot get my helmet off.
Whacko is in shock. He has parked his KB on its side stand and is walking around in circles. I am watching him and I suppress an urge to smile.

WHACKO!


He cannot hear me. I am yelling from inside my helmet.

Suddenly a lot of people help me up. I am confused and am trying to figure out where they came from. I then realise they are the passengers from the ST.

Whacko snaps to and helps the others lift me up and take me to the side of the road. it is a bridge typr crossing so there is a little wall on both sides. They leave me sitting on the wall and Whacko helps me get my helmet off.

My hands are badly scraped and bleeding. My jeans have a lot of blood up front.

People have collected around us in a semi circle.
I can hear someone tell the driver
Gaadi peeche karo, motorcyle neeche phus gaya hai.

Through the crowd I peer, only to realise that my bike is completely mangled, twisted and stuck under the chassis of the bus.
The bus is reversed and the bike is pulled out.

The handle is completely flattened. The clutch has met the front brake.

The crowd is now murmuring and some people are trying to yell at us "Kaisa chalata hai"

Thank you, abhi jaao tum.
I say. The bus driver looks at us.
Aur tum?
Idhar theek hai, tum jao.
Police?
Koi police case nahi karne ka hai. Chalo tum log jaao. Thank you.

The crowd is still around us, in an unsure semicircle. others have gotten off the bus to take a look. Of course. This is India, everyone must take a look.

Whacko reaches into his jacket pocket and pulls out two Dominicans.

Cigar?
I wordlessly take one from him and bite off the tip.
He clicks the Zippo and I puff hard.
It holds.

Whacko is still staring at my face in a strange way.

I lived. Not bad.

Last edited by Sam Kapasi : 26th May 2008 at 16:53.
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Old 26th May 2008, 16:59   #34
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sam Kapasi View Post
Cigar?
I wordlessly take one from him and bite off the tip.
He clicks the Zippo and I puff hard.
It holds.

Whacko is still staring at my face in a strange way.

I lived. Not bad.
@Sam, You are an amazing story teller.

But what a crazy guy you are.
How could you just calmly smoke after an horrifying experience.

Only one of kind for sure... HATS OFF for you

PS. There goes a half of a Monday refreshing IE for Sam next post..
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Old 26th May 2008, 17:07   #35
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Quote:
Originally Posted by leadf00t View Post
How could you just calmly smoke after an horrifying experience.
Regardless of the circumstances, how could anyone say no to a fresh Dominican rolled on a young Latina's warm thigh?
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Old 26th May 2008, 17:26   #36
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Sam, amazing narration skills. It just seems to make the reader feel as he was present during your ordeal.

Khudos to you and looking forward to many more. No, I didn't mean the Ordeals, one wee bit, but more anecdotes, tales and sagas.
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Old 26th May 2008, 17:33   #37
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Default Now what?

The bus has left.

Whacko and I are sitting by the side of the road. My bike is lying down wounded on the grass and his KB is parked to the side.
I'm inspecting myself.

I'm hurt and bruised in many places. Nothing broken.
A large portion of flesh is hanging through a torn sock. That accounts for the bloody jeans.
A shoulder is bruised, both palms are scratched and wounded. The damage is not bad.

Whacko is still in shock.

A word that rhymes with duck is all that he has managed to say repeatedly. Over and over, shaking his head.
I am silent. Just happy to be alive.

I know that there is a highway users club up ahead. I suggest to Whacko we go there.
And the bike? He points with his face.
Who's going to touch it whacks? It's all twisted.

2.45 PM: I'm sitting behind Whacko as he rides slowly towards the Highway Users' club. Everything hurts.

On the way I decide it's time to ask for help. We stop at an STD booth and I call the shop. My sister will be there for sure. Who else?
She answers the phone.
Hello?
Is Dwayne there with you?
Yes. Why?
Just give him the phone will you?


Hello?
Dwayne?
Ah Sammy Boy, what's up?
Whacks and I have had an accident.
What?
Softly, maria will hear you.

Softer now. What?
We're OK, actually only I had an accident. But I'm fine. A little bruised but fine.
We need help. Is Jhats around?
He's here.
OK give him the phone.


Jhats was the only one amongst all of us who knew everything about cars and bikes. Hell, he could fix any bike. (He's a member here BTW)
Hello?
Jhats??
Yeah?
Jhats I've crashed the RX. Don't react. I am fine, I don't want Maria to know, she will panic.
I see.
I'm serious, I've had a bad accident.
OK...

We cannot truck the bike across to Mumbai. I have no money for the truck and besides we might have to pay octroi. Plus I didn't register the accident with the police.
OK...

I need you to come here and fix the bike.
Umm OK....

Silence.

Jhats?


Yes, yes, I am thinking.
What are you thinking?
What parts will you need?
I dunno for God's sake.
But tomorrow is a Sunday. All spare parts stores will be closed. We have to buy the stufff now. What do you think you'll need.

I'm having a Beavis moment.

Uhhh.. A handle.
A handle?
Yeah a handle.
And?
I dunno.
Why do you need a handle.
He's being patient.
The clutch has met the front brake. It's flattened. It came under the bus.
You'll probably need a new accelerator cable and brake cable.
Yeah. Cool. Cables.
What else?
I dunno.
What else has happened to the bike?
It looks horrible Jhats.
He's quiet. I know I'm not helping, but I'm feeling stupid and helpless.
Everything is spoiled jhats.
OK I'll figure it out. Where are you guys?
Uhh.. I dunno. We need to get me patched up. I'll call again. Don't tell Maria.

Click.

Last edited by Sam Kapasi : 26th May 2008 at 17:44.
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Old 26th May 2008, 17:52   #38
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Sam, I dont know why, but most of your stories bring back our childhood/teenage memories. We are somehow able to relate to all these events in someway.
Thanks for writting these tales and making me remind me of my olden days when I was innocent, careless, without money and still the life was so eventful.
can never get those days back.
cheers.
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Old 26th May 2008, 17:52   #39
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Smile

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sam Kapasi View Post
Whacko reaches into his jacket pocket and pulls out two Dominicans.

Cigar?
I wordlessly take one from him and bite off the tip.
He clicks the Zippo and I puff hard.
It holds.

Whacko is still staring at my face in a strange way.

I lived. Not bad.
Now Thats the Spirit of Life
cheers:
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Old 26th May 2008, 17:53   #40
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Ok, ok. Dont tell Maria. But do tell us.... and fast!!!
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Old 26th May 2008, 18:15   #41
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Fantastic.

Glued on.

Henceforth, an open request to Sam and Dolphin and all other master story tellers - please post your stories on a weekend.

Imagine India's GDP lost due to hundreds of teambhpians stopping work to read your by-the-hour updates Only on weekends - puhleeease!

And yes, Dil maange more!!
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Old 26th May 2008, 18:15   #42
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Default YetiBlog® Saturday, 1996 - continued

3.15 pm: We're at the club. They have a first aid/casualty section and when I hobble in with Whacko, 2 people rush to take care of me.
I am sitting on a chair and I am being cleaned up by 2 people.

My wounds are being disinfected and bandaged while Whacko explains what happened to the staff. They react with the appropriate oohs and aahs.

3.45 pm:
The guys have finished with me. Nothing serious, they assure me. I smile brightly. I'm really glad to be alive.
How about your bike? One asks.
I dunno, it's about 10-15 kms away I guess.
On the road?
Yes.
We should get it here. You can park it here.
Really?
Yes.
That would be fantastic because my friends will come here to fix it tomorrow morning.
yes, that's fine, you can leave it here overnight.
Does the bike work?
I don't think so, it's all uhh.. twisted.


Whacko and the staff are talking to the side.

He comes back.
Dude, we're going to get your bike here.
How?
In the ambulance.


I'm staring at him. I blink. I could have sworn he said ambulance.
What?
In the ambulance. We will load the bike in their ambulance and bring it here.
Whose idea was that?
Theirs.

One of the staff come up to me and tell me that I will have to pay for the ambulance. About 25 bucks per kilometre.
I agree.
Soon they're gone with Whacko.

About an hour later, the ambulance returns. No the siren is not on, lol.
They unload the bike out.

Now that it is vertical again, it looks a little mangled but not as bad as it did horizontal.

God, my poor bike.

5.30 pm: We wave our thanks and we're off on the KB towards Bombay. There was no Mumbai then. I'm getting very hungry.

6.00 pm: We stop for a sandwich and coffee. As whacko bites into the sandwich a thought occurs to him.

Man you could have died.
Yeah,
I nod, eating hungrily.
Really man. You could have died.
Yeah.
What would I have told my Mom if you had died?
Shaking head.
I stop eating and stare at him.
Whacks?
Hmm?
Nevermind your mom. What would you have told my Dad?
Ah.
says he. he didn't think of that.
I need a drink.
So do I.
There's that party at Pali Hill you know. The girlfriend's sister's birthday party. They aren't expecting us. let's surprise them.
OK but let's buy a bottle of Vodka at chembur.

OK.
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Old 26th May 2008, 18:27   #43
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Default The Plan

7.00pm: We stop at a payphone and call them again. They have a plan.

Here's what we're going to do. Tomorrow morning at 6, we will take the van.
(Note: I had a legendary Maruti Van. We were always using it for everything. This van once took 13 people up lonavala for a picnic and much more. All without a single oil change for 4 years.)

The van. OK I see. Why?
The 4 of us will go to your bike in the Van. If I can fix it, great, otherwise we will load the bike into the van and drive across to Mumbai. Simple.
How will you get the bike into the van?
We will remove the sound system...

(Note: The Van had a HUGE box with 2 12" woofers, 2 8 inch mid bass and 4 philips dome tweeters in the back)
...and remove the rear seat. Should be enough.
OK....

See you tomorrow at 6am at your house.

Click.

Whacks, they have a plan. It's all done. Let's go get drunk now.

9.00pm: Whacko, I and a bottle of Romanov (There was no Smirnoff then) enter the party. Everyone is surprised to see us. People are also surprised to see that we have brought Vodka and bandages.

Sunday,1.00 am: Whacko and I have polished off the bottle we brought with us and finished another half bottle that belonged to someone else who thought we needed it more than he.
Whacko has called his mom and told her he's spending the night in Pune.
I'm waiting for my Dad to fall asleep.

We get home and crash. I was in some pain and various areas were inflamed.
The Vodka has killed all pain and we are both very very seriously drunk.

6am sounds fine haha, my father will have gone for his walk by then. No one needs to know what we will do next.

To be continued.
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Old 26th May 2008, 18:44   #44
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Man! This is some adventure!
I started my wake up coffee pot, found dolphin's story and then this story... people have finished the one I made and made one more - gotta go and make the third one now

Amazing tale sam - I will keep hitting refresh till you finish or that button does!
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Old 26th May 2008, 18:48   #45
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Holy moly Sam. How many lives do you have? First a scorpion and now this. Hope your brushes with death stopped here.

Any tattoo's to cover these scar's? LOL

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sam Kapasi View Post
how could anyone say no to a fresh Dominican rolled on a young Latina's warm thigh?
Are you sure its rolled on a young latina's warm thigh? I hope they wax regularly.

Whatever Sam, you needed it to cool those fresh wounds.
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