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Old 13th May 2010, 14:54   #1
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The following incident happened a week or two ago in Pune –
It was 10 minutes past 9 o clock in the night, I was just a short distance away from home, coming back from office. Suddenly an Indica cab (the ultimate threat/dadagiri machines on Indian roads) driver tried to overtake me from the right side where there was no room and a big cement divider on the right and gutter & sabziwalas on the left. He had to back off due to lack of room but in process of his hastiness and eagerness to overtake at any cost, he bruised my car’s right side bumper.

I got out of my car thinking that he has broken something in the back but relieved to see that it was a small bruise. Aahhhh …. I argued with him for a bit, he was youngish driver in his 20s. I was about to turn away and walk towards my car, suddenly couple of drunkards in their 40s appeared from nowhere and started arguing with me. I tried to remain calm as much as possible. By that time the Indica driver fled away.
I said to the drunkards -
Me – “Ok folks, he has left the place, what can we do, let's move”
One of the aggressive drunkard – “abbe &^%$*, kudhko kya &**^%% samazata kya etc. etc. etc. again *&^%&$”
Me – “arre boss, what happened? Did I say anything to you? Am not saying anything to you. He hit my car and fled away now, what’s the point in talking about it now?”
Drunkard – “again &^*%($* etc. etc.”

And by then local taporis (young gundas) staying nearby appeared in the scene. One of the aggressive ones scolded me, “arre shanya &*^%$ Is this how you speak to elderly people?”
Me –“What did I say? They are the ones talking here. Shall we go now, there is no use of arguing”
Again the local tapori –“ &*^$%#^#, khudko shana samazata hai. Gaadi se ghumata hai to shaan mar raha hai, jyada charabi chadhi hai kya”
Me – “???????? (What can I say now!!)”

(Pardon use of regional (hindi) language and use of "&*^$%" characters to reflect abusive words used. Intention is just to show how the conversation went).

And suddenly the tapori started hitting me. The things were going out of hand and obviously to defend myself, I also hit him back hard and that’s it. All people around me (his tapori friends, drunkards etc.) started hitting me heavily and I was beaten to the point that I just stood helpless there, thinking what else they can do. Anyway there was no one to help me or take my side there and the mob was just against me without any reason. My glasses were broken. After seeing that I am not reacting in any manner, they stopped. Couple of watchers (out of hundreds who gathered to watch the tamasha) approached and asked me to leave the place. I had no other option but to collect my nerve, start the car and leave the scene calmly. Fortunately, they did not hit the car or anything else. My face was swollen from one side, some blood on my hands – I was looking a bit like a boxer after the match or someone from the movie – “fight club” (not saying Brad Pitt )

Reality is, there are bustling flight clubs at every corner of the city, we just don’t notice it or as we are taught since childhood - we ignore it and continue to live a calm & peaceful life. I’ve experienced these kinds of brawls in the past, though I wasn’t directly a part of it or it was in the childhood so everything was a game.

The incident has not shaken me, not did cost much of a physical damage but the thoughts still linger in my mind -
  • “What wrong did I do? Am I not supposed to drive my car and defend it in case of bullying by others? Was it because I had the bigger car out of the two? Should I always be submissive with head down so that they will not touch me? Or should I join karate classes or take up boxing? Build six packs and remove shirt before the fight so that they will be frightened?”
  • “Is this the way the mob always is – and why? Is it their frustration? Anger? They seemed to enjoy the bullying and fighting since they were in groups, must have drank to their heart in the night, with recent brave accomplishment under their belt”
  • “What’s the solution? – there is no point in police complaint, we all know how it goes. What am I expected to do – collect my friends and hit them back? Have powerful allies - make friendship with more powerful gundas so that next time I’ll be in better position? then what’s difference between them and us then? Violence is not the solution. Then Gandhigiri? – Giving flowers to them tonight for their brave act? And of course, forgetting it completely.”
  • “How and when are they going to learn the lesson then? Isn’t there any decency remaining?”
  • “Curse the country and the system?"
  • Help in slum child education causes/initiatives? Hoping that if I am able to support and educate at least one kid from slums, that will help reduce violence from the world. Just doing a bit at my level
Well, all said and done, I am back to office the next day – experiencing same kind of traffic chaos, same indica cabbies, same 6 seaters, rickshaws and small bus-wallas breaking rules in all manners possible.

And as usual, I had my car’s window glasses rolled up, AC ON, and songs playing from music CD to eliminate all external noises and realities.

Back to the dream-world!!
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Old 13th May 2010, 15:17   #2
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Sad to know this happened. That's why I always propagate never try to get off your car in unknown places to argue with unknown people at strange times.

Never get in to physical violence, even if you are Bruce Lee.

Remember, pune is a place where people get hacked to death inside the court, teenagers tie up another kid to a tree and brutally behead him, Pregnant women get raped etc.

All you should have done is taken the indicab's number and filed a hit and run complaint at the nearest police station. The drunk buggers just wanted to show who's boss (probably they get thrashed at home by their wives for coming home drunk) and unfortunately, you ended up in fisticuffs with people who were not related to the scenario at all.

Just forget the whole incident and be thankful that women/ children weren't there in your car when all this happened. Try joining SPTM as a volunteer and do your bits on weekends helping police catch offenders. Will be a good feeling to erase what you underwent.
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Old 13th May 2010, 15:34   #3
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Quote:
Or should I join karate classes or take up boxing? Build six packs and remove shirt before the fight so that they will be frightened?”

What am I expected to do – collect my friends and hit them back? Have powerful allies - make friendship with more powerful gundas so that next time I’ll be in better position?
All the above will lead you to peaceless nightmares

Quote:
Should I always be submissive with head down so that they will not touch me?
Violence is not the solution. Then Gandhigiri? – Giving flowers to them tonight for their brave act? And of course, forgetting it completely.”
Again, not all the time you should remain submissive

You need to remain assertive as MX6 says. Or try to flee away from the scene as soon as you find things are going out of control by some means. I remember reading somewhere that, "Never argue with fools, they'll lower you to their level and then beat you with experience".

Quote:
Never get in to physical violence, even if you are Bruce Lee
+1 & couldn't agree more

@Parag - on such situations everyone tends to yell at top of their voice & scream, panic & what not & that's the expectation of everyone around you. Give them a little surprise, remain calm, call the cops immediately, no matter you're filing a case or not, whether you're at fault or not, it safe guards you from the mob.

Consider yourself lucky that the mob didn't damage your car & left you only with minor injuries rather than broken arms or something.
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Old 13th May 2010, 15:53   #4
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Parag that was one pathetic experience you had, just shows that we live among a huge frustrated lot!

Ideal thing to do in this scenario is to slip off asap as one can never make a drunk understand and more the time you spend you get more attention...
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Old 13th May 2010, 15:57   #5
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Hey hard luck there, dude. Take it as a lesson. And thank your stars it didnt go beyond a few blows.

Seems you are a bit affected by the incident. Good you wrote about it on here it will help lighten the load.

Get on with life.

As for the scum who did that to you, believe in Karma. They will get thier punishment for whatever they did. They live a miserable life anyways and will suffer forever due to such behaviour.
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Old 13th May 2010, 15:57   #6
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You cannot do anything about it, there is no way out, if you see some one abusing just walk away, There was this incedance i recollect. The LPG cylender at our house was leaking, no one at the gas shop was picking up the phone. I and wife decided to go to the gas agency it was 7 pm, we went there which is in a posh residential colony, i park our car which is well tinted a couple of yards away and my wife still in the car, i walk towards the agency to find the place deserted even with out a watch man, their godown is just 1 km away so i thought going there would be sensible. As i turn around i see two people walking, its a usual custom in kerala where people dont mind their own bussiness. One of the two guy asked me what am i doing here, i politly told him my situation, to that he said he can help and started asking me about my home, i sensed he is drunk and tried avoiding him, he started abusing, the other guy was in senses and tried to control him. I just walked away from the scene. There are some days which are ment to be like this you cannot help. I was lucky it ended at that.

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Old 13th May 2010, 16:03   #7
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Its very difficult to argue with a drunk.
It was a bad situation and there is not much you could do.

However, in future do not reply, simply keep walking away as if you have not heard them.
Get inside the car, don't bother to stop for answering/ clarifying or reasoning with such low lifes.

If they are between your car and you. Then simply shout act hysterical. Be loud. Abuse the fellow who as left already. Distract. Till you get into car and leave.

Again never bother to clarify/ reason or talk with them directly.


Once there was this drunk idiot on the road. Abusing everyone and everything. Very foul language.
None of use even acknowledged him.

He finally comes to this drain that has an elevated concrete slab on it.
There was a newspaper lying on it.
The drunk now vents his ire on the newspaper. It had the picture of someone. Very foul abuses and to make his point the drunk kicked the paper really hard.
He forgot it was on an elevated concrete slab.

I think he broke his toe.

It was hilarious. The pain was obviously terrible and he was crying like a baby. But the entire street burst out laughing.
It was not one of my finer moments, but its was impossible to not laugh at the drunk.
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Old 13th May 2010, 16:12   #8
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Goodness me. Thank your stars for the fact that you came out without any serious injuries. The car can be repaired, but any grave injuries to your self could have costed you and your family a lot more than money.

I just hope it wasn't the case of the Marathi vs intruders (north Indians). It would be a bigger shame for a country which prides itself for being a secular nation.

The best option in such situations is to suck up your ego and say sorry. I know its easy for me to preach, while sitting infront of a laptop, but unfortunately that' the only option which can work.

Going to the Police or threatning the locals won't help as in most cases, as someone or the other in the mob would have a friend or a relative in the local Police Station. I have seen it in Delhi, Mob violence that is, on more than one accassion and the best and the safest option always has been to walk away.

Some of my friends in Gurgaon got into an argument with a drunk (local guy) in a lift coz he had misbehaved with their lady friend and slapped the guy couple of times. This drunk guy came back with 50-60 other guys armed with everything you can possibly imagine and by the time they left 3 of my friends had fractures and the other 2 needed stiches. They called the Police for help and to file a complaint against the local 'goondas'. But the Police actually charged them for creating a nuisence and beating up a innocent guy. They had to pay 20K to avoid an FIR against them and spending the night in Jail.

On a broader issue, I don't think there is any solution. The Govt of India (read the politicians who make up the Govt) needs these Goondas to win elections, take care of minor issues like eliminating any honest officer who threatens to blow up their cover, etc etc. And this holds for every political party in India.

More than 50% of the voters are still illitrate or have a very elimentary level of education. As long as this statistic doesn't change for the better, there is no hope. As long as the profile of voters doesn't improve, the profile of contestants wont improve. And untill then the profile of the MP' and MLA' wont improve and the quality of Governance won't improve.

Last edited by Devil on Wheels : 13th May 2010 at 16:16.
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Old 13th May 2010, 17:16   #9
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Really sad to know about the incident.

As suggested by others, there is nothing much that can be done about these low lives. Aptly said by Spitfire that their Karma will get them one day.

Next time onwards, be wary of such people and steer clear of such situations.
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Old 13th May 2010, 17:34   #10
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Sad to know we live in such a fragile world. Its always better to avoid the strangers but if they keep bothering us? Answer is still we should try avoiding them and get out of the scene. Reason is simple, noone cares to do anything brutal to anyone just for the matter of a matchbox to light their cigarettes. Atleast about Kerala which is my home, situations had gone really bad in last 5 to 8 years. All due to the difficulty in maintaining life through the expensive routines. Its better not to think about all these, you cant sleep peacefully.
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Old 13th May 2010, 22:29   #11
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I guess you just walked into a no-win situation. Its like mud-wrestling with a pig. You both get muddy, but he will be enjoying it.

I understand how it feels to be wronged and not being able to do anything about it. Had an experience with an rick driver. The best way to deal with this is to walk away the moment you sense the s**t is about to hit the fan.
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Old 14th May 2010, 00:53   #12
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Bad luck mate, I guess you got down at a notorious area in your city there. Even in Bangalore, there are some such places where its better to not step out of the car or have any arguments. The brutal reality of our society is that sometimes we need to behave meek along with accepting other problems such as social disparity and jealousy.

As for drunkards, the lesser said the better. I too faced one incident recently, which lead to the breakage of right rear view mirror of my car in a similar fit of rage of a group of unprovoked drunkards. Lesson learned that day was its just not enough to ignore and avoid them, but the luck needs to be in your side.

I totally understand how you feel having faced something similar. Give it time buddy, the bad feeling and the naturally obvious anger will heal.
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Old 14th May 2010, 02:47   #13
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This madness happens all the time. I too was victim to it once.

A young urchin girl rolling on the road happened to touch my bike. Speed was about 5 - 10 Kmph ,very slow.
But believe me in minutes a crowd gathered and I was given a couple blows.
They finally extorted some money out of me for the 'girls treatment' and that was it.
A disgusting experience. More than 15 years since it happened but I vividly recall it.

Can't really do much. In India we have vigilante justice ( injustice ) for traffic offenses.
The unanimous answer to all road violations is get out your vehicle and beat the crap out of the other guy, and the crowd gather in with their charity stokes.

If the accident didn't hurt you the beating after that may kill you.
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Old 14th May 2010, 08:42   #14
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1) You were quite lucky. Otherwise this small could have taken a nasty turn eventually ending up in newspapers and TV channels.

Our country is bursting with these people, these people present everywhere, almost every 100 mtrs. one bike group or a few guys are there. Their only ethics : There is nothing like ethics.

2) Standing up to your rights in India is not possible. The problem we got after we followed the British system that was laid for slaves. At that time we were slaves so if a police officer comes, we had to bow down. We still have to do the same in India, but only difference is that we are a free country.

If we pay taxes, we expect good roads, but our money is misused. Can we stand for our rights and demand good roads ? We pay a specified amount for fuel, but almost at all pumps we are not getting good fuel. Can we stand for our rights ? NO. We cant.

3) Tolerance is a good virtue. Tolerate these things else you will end up wasting your energy and resources.

4) Build a good contacts/influential group. Power card is often required to survive. Building six packs/joining Karate is of no use. They are in groups and if you defend, more people with weapons like pipe, etc will emerge.

PS : I have many experiences where I did try to defend myself, but ended up in a bad situation. The only saving grace was my physical build and the anger on my face. Best avoided, and remember one thing, do not get out of the car unless its a big damage. Later, one can file FIR if need be but stay away from physical confrontations.

EDIT : I am not bashing India, but just telling the truth. Roads Indicate Culture Of The Nation. This word is good enough to tell us many things.

Last edited by aaggoswami : 14th May 2010 at 08:45.
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Old 14th May 2010, 09:47   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aaggoswami View Post
1) You were quite lucky. Otherwise this small could have taken a nasty turn eventually ending up in newspapers and TV channels.

Our country is bursting with these people, these people present everywhere, almost every 100 mtrs. one bike group or a few guys are there. Their only ethics : There is nothing like ethics.

2) Standing up to your rights in India is not possible. The problem we got after we followed the British system that was laid for slaves. At that time we were slaves so if a police officer comes, we had to bow down. We still have to do the same in India, but only difference is that we are a free country.

If we pay taxes, we expect good roads, but our money is misused. Can we stand for our rights and demand good roads ? We pay a specified amount for fuel, but almost at all pumps we are not getting good fuel. Can we stand for our rights ? NO. We cant.

3) Tolerance is a good virtue. Tolerate these things else you will end up wasting your energy and resources.

4) Build a good contacts/influential group. Power card is often required to survive. Building six packs/joining Karate is of no use. They are in groups and if you defend, more people with weapons like pipe, etc will emerge.

PS : I have many experiences where I did try to defend myself, but ended up in a bad situation. The only saving grace was my physical build and the anger on my face. Best avoided, and remember one thing, do not get out of the car unless its a big damage. Later, one can file FIR if need be but stay away from physical confrontations.

EDIT : I am not bashing India, but just telling the truth. Roads Indicate Culture Of The Nation. This word is good enough to tell us many things.

Aiyo swami there you go again, tell me one country in the world where they do not have these issues or little lesser than india, feel lucky to be born here, writing one line about not trying to bash india does not shadow your intentions, sorry for being little candid but this is what you do in every thread. Its time that you wake up and smell the cofee and say india is better (if not the best) than any other country in the world interms of such incidences.


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