[wildsdi5530]

In preparation to writing a book entited 'dummeis guide to driving a town bus', i was collecting some ground work and i would like the valuable thoughts of my fellow team-bhpians. All input will be gratefully acknowledged.Here's what i have.

Always stop in the middle of the road, better still across the road, lest the vehicles following you overtake you.
In narrow roads, keep to the extreme right of the road, after all that's how the americans drive.
The brake is a small lever adjacent the steering wheel and is actuated by the right hand. It emits a fearful sound that scatters all temporary and permanent objects in your way. The lever in between the clutch and accelerator is defunct.
Your vehicle is bound by the laws of physics. Bernouli theorm implies that the narrower and more crowded the road, the faster you will go.
There is always a straight line through every curved road.
All other road users are critters and may be crushed underfoot mindlessly like vermin.
When you have to stop near an intersection, make sure to stop in the exact centre so all other lower vehicles may pay obeisance by honking their horns and waving their hands.
If you hit another vehicle, and the injury is non-fatal, continue driving as if nothing happened. If your bus is stopped by an irate mob, do not get off the vehicle, if someone forces you out, he is obstructing the function of a civil servant and can be penalized.
Your bus has the handling of a F1 racing car. The G forces on sharp cornering are handled with aplomb.

Disclosure
This work is pure imagination and is no way written to discredit any member of any transportation company or government organization. The drivers of real town busses are very dedicated and toil endlessly to make our roads safer. This manuscript and forthcoming titles namely 'guide to driving an autorickshaw', 'guide to riding a bicycle in city traffic' .are the satire of an idle mind on a sunday morning.

[atrisarkar]

Nice write-up! I'll try to add a couple more:
1. Be informed that the vehicle you drive has an inherent aura associated with it. In narrow roads, whenever you bring your vehicle to the lesser mortals like passenger cars, the aura will make sure that you get the right of way. Learn to make full use of this potential.

2. The vehicle you drive is driver friendly. If you have relatives arriving at your home and you need a day off then the leftmost pedal should not be used to change the gear levers. This will cause the vehicle to stop abruptly in the middle of the road and ensure your leave for the rest of the day.

3. Learn to obey traffic signals. The lights at the junction are like 'Las Vegas lights' for the beautification of the city. Please do not get distracted by them. Vehicle should come to an immediate halt if a potential passenger is seen waving you to stop. Remember that you are a public servant.

4. Keep yourself neat and clean. Your vehicle comes with a high quality shaving mirror on the right of your window which you may use time to time for your grooming.

[druva]

Its very easy to blame others.


Have you ever thought from the bus drivers view point?

Do any of the buses have power steering (ok, the volvos have. what about others?)

We as car drivers, cuss so much about 2 wheelers cutting across. The bus drivers put up with the same, in addition to smaller cars cutting them.

We in car have AC and audio to reduce our stress. What do the bus drivers have?

They have a larger vehicle with larger blind spot. Lets give them space both on the roads and on the net.

[Sam Kapasi]

Education and manners have not managed to teach decently paid and well fed Indians how to drive cars and motorcycles properly.

Let us now hope satire will teach the poorly paid and uneducated drivers of town buses.

[atrisarkar]

Originally Posted by druva

Its very easy to blame others.....


Have you ever thought from the bus drivers view ...

You might have a point there but does it justify the rash behavior of the town bus drivers?
Also driving is their 'profession' and they should be the ones who should set standards of discipline on the road. Bikes cutting across is an entirely different scenario.
Someone might not be a very disciplined driver but if he is not doing the job for which he is paid, then there should be no excuses for that.

[aa_asif]

Originally Posted by druva

Its very easy to blame others.

Do any of the buses have power steering (ok, the volvos have. what about others?)

We in car have AC and audio to reduce our stress. What do the bus drivers have?

Our BMTC Volvos are equipped with a chilling AC, Automatic Gearbox and Power Steering. You think these "stress relief" equipments are helping them to become better drivers?
Till date I've never seen even a single red city Volvo bus giving way to any smaller vehicles.

[noopster]

More:

-You have the right to stop wherever you want. Location of the designated bus stop is a minor consideration. Commuters need their exercise and it's fun to see them run.
- Signalling when changing lanes is for wussies. Occasionally you may wave a languid hand out the side window or prop up one of those red and white arrow boards that passes for a side indicator, but don't make it a habit.
- Braking hard every few feet is a good practice. It keeps your brakes warm and provides bored passengers some much-needed entertaiment.

[aargee]

Originally Posted by druva

Have you ever thought from the bus drivers view point?

Let me think from their perspective...
- I've 40 kms to cover one way in 60 minutes & the time keeper will check, but heck, I'll blame the traffic & the crowd
- Sigh!!! I can't see the left mirror properly, ok, big deal, let me not see, I'll use the right mirror also to see the left
- Ah!!! So I overtook that slow moving lorry somehow & damn, I should stop now to board passengers, let me stop in the middle of the road so that the lorry does not get pass me so that I need to overtake him again
- Ah!!! there's a gap through which a two-wheeler can get in, let me block so that, if not first, I'll not let others pass
- That signal is turning red & let me pass through, otherwise I need to stand here for a very long time!!! Who'll question me? After all we're part of Govt
- The brakes on this bus is not good, hell with depot manager who's still forcing me to drive, hell with the workshop who's doing a temp fix all the time, hell with the Govt not allocating funds; all the more they're only giving me 20% bonus this year!!! hell with the crowded passengers who're delaying my trip
- For just 1 or 2 passengers, I cannot stop the bus; why didn't you take a different bus that's coming behind?
- All the senior drivers are enjoying 7 trips a day, while a temp staff like me has to suffer with 8 trips. Life's unfair!!!
- Why did the time keeper ask me to drive when the same route bus has gone just 2 minutes ago, that too when its almost time for me to go home. Hell with this job, I'm going to finish this trip ASAP & head home!!!
- I'll help my friends by stopping where they request even though its not a bus stop
- Wanna race? Wanna race? I don'tve any issues, the bus is Govt's & I loose nothing if I'm knocked, just think about yourself

Note - All the above comments have been personally observed or heared by me over the years by travelling in MTC, Chennai. Would you like to hear my experiences from conductors?

Education and manners have not managed to teach decently paid and well fed Indians how to drive cars and motorcycles properly

Education has got nothing to do with driving etiquettes!!! Education is at school & manners are taught at home. Most of the people behave like apes because they do not know the consequence of any accident. Once they're bed ridden in GH at general ward amidst of celaine bottles & phenoyl smelling floors, they'll start regretting for hurrying up on one second.

I've seen few cab drivers who are not even passed primary education, but drives very decently. Try any cab/vehicle from OST in Chennai, they're really good. I once came across an extra ordinary driver, who was just 8th passed, but uses all 3 mirrors to fullest (probably spending more than 60% of the time) & drives in a very good speed (not over speed for sure). Probaby one of the best driver I've ever seen in my life. He consistently took 45-50 minutes to cover a distance of 48 Kms. Yes that was in the night, but still, most drivers took about 75+ minutes to cover the same distance.

Law enforcement is the key to turn all the law from paper to practice.

[DWind]

Some more
-That share auto and Tata Magic are stealing my passengers. And they use my bus stop. This is not fair! Just because they are politically connected? Let me show you how connected I am! Let me overtake them and not allow them to start from the bus stop. I am suffering out here. Let others suffer.
-Damn! That bus in front of me is not moving. I am out of here. I don't care who is in my right lane and how fast they are. Give way to the Govt Servant
-The left lane is only for stopping. And I am not going to stop until the conductor whistles to stop, no matter what. I will drive on the right side of the lane. Others can go to hell or overtake me from left.

[aargee]

Originally Posted by DWind

That share auto and Tata Magic are stealing my passengers

^^^ may not be true because they care a damn on MTC's revenue.

But

Originally Posted by DWind

And they use my bus stop

^^^ can be absolute true. They show all their patriotism only with my bus, my bus stand, my road & forget they key point - my passengers!!!

Come to think of it, the bus waits for boarding the passengers on the left lane while the imaptient bikers, cyclists & sometimes the share auto tries to overtake the bus through the left when they've blocked the entire right side - the safety of passengers is put to risk!!!

No point writing on the bus saying "Payanigalin Nanban" (Passengers friends)

@DWind - one sentence - you've penned down beautiful points that are absolutely true.

[wildsdi5530]

Lots of very good points.
I was talking of town buses which ply between all the small villages, stray onto the GQ, drive through 5 tonne bridges (not sure how much a bus weighs), etc.
But the city buses seem to be worse?
And GTO does this thread really belong to commercial vehicles in India??

[druva]

Originally Posted by aa_asif

Our BMTC Volvos are equipped with a chilling AC, Automatic Gearbox and Power Steering. You think these "stress relief" equipments are helping them to become better drivers?
...
Till date I've never seen even a single red city Volvo bus giving way to any smaller vehicles.
...

Originally Posted by aargee

...

So you think the cars and bikes yield to others and the bus drivers dont?
Why not a dummies guide for the car drivers?

Mates, I can only quote "Be the Change you want to be".

Originally Posted by Sam Kapasi

Education and manners have not managed to teach decently paid and well fed Indians how to drive cars and motorcycles properly.

Let us now hope satire will teach the poorly paid and uneducated drivers of town buses.

If i read this correctly, Sam also has ridiculed this thread and none had replied to him. Wish I can write like him.