What if there were more women drivers then men?
WARNING: To all the Women who may find this sexist, I would apologies in advance but I at the same time I insist that the content of this write-up at this forum are neither intended to be sexiest nor are meant to offend you. I have utmost respect for women and consider them to be far superior beings than us men
This write-up is not written to ascertain who drives better; men or women, but it’s an attempt in a humorous fashion to identify difference in habits of men & women when it comes to driving styles & manners. I hope this clarification in advance will insulate me from being summoned by NCW! So here I go….
Men are different from Women in all sorts of ways, physically biologically & logically. Driving habits manifest this obvious difference in behavior.
Let’s face it, cars are predominantly conceived by more men than women, manufactured by men more than women and in general, we can safely assume without drawing ire of the fairer sex that auto industry in general is more male dominated.
Men, being the “dominant specie” (well that’s what we would like to believe but nothing can be farther from the truth) have more or less defined how the traffic should more or less behave.
I mean more men then women drive on roads (most obvious in India) so the behavior of traffic reflects sensibilities of a man, the way we drive in relation to each other.
In other words since men form the majority of car users hence the cars are more designed to suite needs of men in general and the traffic reflects mostly the driving habits & sensibilities of men (rather than a women, which is that being the primary reason why men will jump out of their seats to say “woman at wheel” the moment they spot a lady driving a car)
WHAT IF THERE WERE MORE WOMEN DRIVERS?
IMAGINE what if the tables turned? What if more women then men formed the universe of car users??? Oh dear…yeah right but just imagine the scenario. The whole traffic behavior would change and I reckon the following could happen:
NO REAR VIEW MIRROS:
Rear view mirrors will not be required in a car since women never watch their mirrors anyways.
ONLY VANITY MIRRORS
Only vanity mirrors will exist and they will be available for all seats in the car (instead of only the driver and/ or front passenger seats currently).
The driver side vanity mirror will be “electronically adjustable” to view comfortably various aspects of the drivers face from various angels (the redundant “rearview mirror adjustment switch” can be put to good use here)
POSSIBLY NO TURN INDICATORS
Since most women don’t watch their mirrors & turn anywhere, anytime; most probably the turn indicators will also go as they are hardly used by women; since it will be a common practice totally acceptable amongst the drivers (women)
GLOVE BOX WILL BE CALLED "VANITY BOX"
It’s a mystery anyways for most of us why the holder of all sundry items in a car dashboard called a “Glove Box” and since it’s likely to hold considerable amounts of make-up goodies it will be called “Vanity Box”.
It is highly likely that it will come with various sub-sections contained with-in like a “Lipstick Holder”, may be a “cooled” a “Nail polish Rack” etc etc..
PERFECTLY OK TO WAIT A COUPLE OF MINUTES AT A TRAFFIC LIGHT TO WRAP-UP MAKE-UP REGIME
Unlike now, it would be considered extremely rude to honk at a car in front of you, which has been rendered temporarily immobile, because the lady driver was applying make-up of some kind while the lights were red and has been caught at the fag end or half way of completing it when the lights turned green. It will be completely acceptable behavior.
Other women drivers will patiently wait for the compatriot in car in front to say: put the lid of the lipstick and put it in the glove box no..the “Vanity Box” properly AFTER THE LIGHTS TURN GREEN.
HAZARD WARNING LAMP WILL BECOME "MAKE-UP LIGHT"!
Now this is a debatable one, however I firmly believe that what we see today as a red color “Triangle under a triangle” hazard warning button will be replaced by red color “graphic image” of a lady applying make-up and this button will be called “Make-up Warning Lamp”.
When ever a lady driver has the sudden or not so sudden urge and/or need to apply make-up at leisure on road, she could just press this button (Make-up Warning Lamp) and turn left or right (REMEMBER THERE ARE NO TURN INDICATORS) to park themselves on the side of the road and apply make-up.
This, again, will be example of completely acceptable behavior by fellow women drivers as they would totally empathize with this lady’s urge to apply proper full-fledged make-up on the road and taking a sudden left or a right turn by just pressing the “Make-up Warning Lamp”
SPEEDS WILL GO DOWN
Overall traffic speeds will go down as most women in at least in India drive between 17.7 kms / hr & 22.5 km / hr.
PARALLEL PARKING WILL BE AN OFFENCE
Fact, women can’t parallel park, so parallel parking will be banned and deemed criminal as it will be considered derogatory to have parallel parking provision.
However, since parallel parking is beneficial for smooth traffic flow, reality shows like “Parallel Parking Idol” may come-up.
"SERVICE REQUIRED” IMMOBILIZER
Since generally women think a car can work & run infinitely without ever needing a service, the cars will begin to have a feature where-in a car will render it “totally immobile” if not taken for service station after giving 30 days of advance warning saying it “needs service”.
PMS WARNING LIGHT
PMS is a killer, so there would be a small light at top of every car which will glow red when the driver presses the “PMS Warning” button placed prominently next to the “Make-up warning Light” button.
This will help all other drivers to avoid messing with the driver of this car, give her clear passage and generally letting her do what she desires.
However there will be some cool & obvious visible benefits too, such as:
1.With reduced testosterone levels on the roads, road rage will go down
2.Fewer fatal accidents as speeds will be reduced considerably
3.Very few speeds bumps (speak breakers) will be around once again due to lower overall speeds.
4.Once in a while we might get to see a Cat Fight on the road!
That’s all for now.. do send in your comments & feedback
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