[Irish]

England invented 20-20 cricket,
And we invented 3 day Test Match !


Cheers!
Irish

[mayankk]

from stumble upon....

[vsh]

Originally Posted by _raVan_

And Ajmat is the one responsible for coining the word "condored"

and now i am using the verb "condor" in my day-today conversations. its an official word for me now

[sammyboy]

Got this as a SMS forward :

Tring Tring
Bhajji: Hello
Yuvraj : Oye match dekha (hey did you see the match)
Bhajji : haan (yeah) - ha ha ha ha ha ha
Yuvraj: ha ha ha ha ha
Bhajji : ha ha ha ha
Yuvraj : Ok bye

Corny but made me smile

[dhanushs]

Harry Potter, now in Kerala!

[dhanushs]

Some school time jokes!. Found the 1st one rather amusing!



P.S: With condoring at its peak, I hope I'm not condored.

[bluevolt]

Santa: I am so miser (kanjoos) that I went alone for my honeymoon and saved half the money.

Banta: That is nothing, I saved full money. I sent my wife for honeymoon with a friend.

________________________

Wife- Its my bad luck that I married you, otherwise lots of smart boys were interested in me.

.
.
.
.
.

Husband- Of course they must be smart, thats why they escaped from you.

[Irish]

Dhoni is banned just for wasting 10-15 minutes.
But he should be awarded, because he saved 2.5 days also.


Cheers!
Irish

[Oxy]

NOTICE TO EMPLOYEES:

It has come to our attention recently that many of you have been turning in time sheets that specify large amounts of Miscellaneous Unproductive Time.

Unproductive time is not a problem. What is a problem, however, is not knowing exactly what you are doing with your unproductive time. The newly installed Activity Based Costing Financial System requires additional information to achieve its goals.

Attached is a sheet specifying a tentative extended job code list based on our observations of employee activities. The list will allow you to specify with better precision what you are doing during your unproductive time. Please begin using this job code list immediately and let us know about any difficulties you may encounter.

Extended Task Code List Code - Explanation:

5000 Surfing the Net
5001 Reading/Writing Social Email
5002 Sharing Social E-Mail (see codes #5003, #5004)
5003 Collecting Jokes and Other Humorous Material via E- Mail
5004 Forwarding Jokes and Other Humorous Material via E- Mail
5005 Faxing Jokes and Other Humorous Material to Friends not on E-Mail
5316 Meeting
5317 Obstructing Communications at Meeting
5318 Trying to sound knowledgeable while in Meeting
5319 Waiting for Break
5320 Waiting for Lunch
5321 Waiting for End of Day
5322 Vicious Verbal Attacks Directed at Coworker
5323 Vicious Verbal Attacks Directed at Coworker while Coworker Is Not Present
5393 Covering for Incompetence of Coworker Friend
5400 Trying to Explain Concept to Coworker Who Is Not Interested in Learning
5401 Trying to Explain Concept to Coworker Who is Stupid
5402 Trying to Explain Concept to Coworker Who Hates Me
5481 Buying Snack
5482 Eating Snack
5500 Filling Out Time Sheet
5501 Inventing Time Sheet Entries
5502 Waiting for Something to Happen
5503 Scratching Myself
5504 Sleeping
5510 Feeling Bored
5600 Bellyaching about Lousy Job (see code #5610)
5601 Bellyaching about Low Pay (see code #5610)
5602 Bellyaching about Long Hours (see code #5610)
5603 Bellyaching about Coworker (see codes #5322, #5323)
5604 Bellyaching about Boss (see code #5610)
5605 Bellyaching about Personal Problems
5610 Searching for a New Job
5640 Miscellaneous Unproductive Bellyaching
5701 Not Actually Present at Job
5702 Suffering from Eight-Hour Flu
6102 Ordering Out
6103 Waiting for Food Delivery to Arrive
6104 Taking it Easy while Digesting Food
6200 Using Company Resources for Personal Profit
6201 Stealing Company Goods
6202 Making Excuses after Accidentally Destroying Company Goods
6203 Using Company Phone to Make Long-Distant Personal Calls
6206 Gossiping
6207 Planning a Social Event
6210 Feeling Sorry for Myself
6221 Pretending to Work While Boss is Watching
6222 Pretending to Enjoy My Job
6223 Pretending I Like My Coworkers
6224 Pretending I Like Important People When in Reality They Are Jerks
6238 Miscellaneous Unproductive Fantasizing
6601 Running my Own Business on Company Time
6602 Complaining
6603 Writing a Book on Company Time
6604 Planning a Vacation on Company Time
6611 Staring Into Space
6612 Staring at Computer Screen
6615 Transcendental Meditation
7281 Extended Trip to the Bathroom (at least 10 min.)
7400 Talking with Lawyer on Phone
7401 Talking with Plumber on Phone
7402 Talking with Dentist on Phone
7403 Talking with Doctor on Phone
7404 Talking with Masseuse on Phone
7405 Talking with House Painter on Phone
7406 Talking with Personal Therapist on Phone
7419 Talking with Miscellaneous Paid Professional on Phone
7420 Using 900 Area Code
7425 Talking with Mother on Phone (also see code #7400)
7931 Asking Coworker to Aid Me in a Work Activity

[RajaTaurus]

Hey Indian Cricket Fans...!!!!!!
I am Dhonimbir Dravidulkarman
and
I am singing this song for all of you.
You all...
From today forget Dhanush's song and,
sing this song
and do flash-mob
in every city of India.. Okay?

Here I go…..

Why This Kolaveri Kolaveri Kolaveri Da…. (Da is for men as to Di is for girl or women).
Why This Kolaveri Kolaveri Kolaveri Da….
Distance-u-laa….. Ball-u.. Ball-u…, Ball-u … Color-u… White-u…..
Aussie Bowling…… Fast-u…. Fast-u…, First-u…. Ball Out-u……
Why This Kolaveri Kolaveri Kolaveri Da….
Why This Kolaveri Kolaveri Kolaveri Da….
Hmmmmm…
My-e Bowling…. Slow-u…. Slow-u……, they are…. not-u... Out-u.
My-e Fielding…. sloppy …. Sloppy….., they are….. veri... Happy…
Why This Kolaveri Kolaveri Kolaveri Da….
Why This Kolaveri Kolaveri Kolaveri Da….
Handla Glass-u, Glass la Scotch-u, Bank-la full-a… Cash-u…...
Match-u Loss-u….., IPL Come-u….., Life Top-u Gear-u…
Money, Money…….., Lot of money…., Give me Iyepee.. Yell-u…!
Fans-u… Fans-u……., Stupid Fans-u……, you have no brains-u……!
God I yam Enjoying Now-u…….., They are crying, how-u?
This song for the fans-u…., you have no choice-u…..
Why This Kolaveri Kolaveri Kolaveri Da….
Why This Kolaveri Kolaveri Kolaveri Da….
You dontu readu this songu... You mustu singu... To gettu Real Efectu... Okayaa.???

- Author - Myself.

[gt_bhp]

Loved the lyrics you've written, very apt!

[Anand123]

Its better to follow safety measures from cycle-days itself

[kablu]

Originally Posted by RajaTaurus

Hey Indian Cricket Fans...!!!!!!
I am Dhonimbir Dravidulkarman
and
I am singing this song for all of you.
You all...
===============
- Author - Myself.

. Sir, I actually spilled coffee all over my desk and LOL. My colleagues rushed to my place. Just now, I explained what happened and they too had a hearty laugh reading your Kolaveri - Cricket version.enjoyed thoroughly.Though I hate the original Kolaveri song, I love this version

[myavu]

Overambitious!



Cheers!

[Irish]

MODS: Please remove this post if you find it vulgar.

General Freaky and his soldiers

The soldiers had been in the field for two weeks and hadn't had showers or been able to change their clothes.

Then one day General Freaky came along and said, "Men, I have some good news and some bad news. Which would you like first?"

All the men shouted, "Tell us the good news, tell us the good news."

General Freaky smiled and said, "Men, the good news is that today we're going to change our underwear."

All the men cheered...

Then General Freaky said, "Now the bad news. Smith, you change with Jones. Jackson, you change with Thomson ... "


Cheers!
Irish