Team-BHP > Shifting gears > Et Cetera


Reply
  Search this Thread
5,472,385 views
Old 15th September 2011, 16:16   #5116
BHPian
 
SuperSlick's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Chennai
Posts: 200
Thanked: 95 Times
Re: The Official Joke thread

This is from an actual trial in the UK as per an old e-mail forward I received. I've not validated this case though!

A young woman who was several months pregnant boarded a bus. When she noticed a young man smiling at her, she began feeling humiliated on account of her condition. She changed her seat and he seemed more amused. She moved again and then on her third move he burst out laughing. She had him arrested.

Then the case came before the court, the young man was asked why he acted in such a manner.

His reply was:

1. When the lady boarded the bus, I couldn't help noticing she was pregnant. She sat under an advertisement, which read 'Coming Soon: The Gold Dust Twins'.

2. I was even more amused when she sat under a shaving advertisement, which read: 'William's Stick Did The Trick'.

3. Then I could not control myself any longer when on the third move she sat under an advertisement, which read: 'Dunlop Rubber would have prevented this accident.'

The case was dismissed!
SuperSlick is offline  
Old 15th September 2011, 16:33   #5117
Senior - BHPian
 
Scorcher's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Trivandrum, KL
Posts: 4,916
Thanked: 7,115 Times
Re: The Official Joke thread

Kid: How did you meet mom?

Dad: Actually, it all started with a "Poke"

Last edited by Scorcher : 15th September 2011 at 16:37.
Scorcher is offline  
Old 15th September 2011, 17:16   #5118
Senior - BHPian
 
Urban_Nomad's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Delhi
Posts: 1,631
Thanked: 2,388 Times
Re: The Official Joke thread

The phone rings:

"tring tring"

Boy - Hello, Chintu hai?

Girl - Nahi hai

Boy - Mujhe ek mauka do ......... ho jaayega.


__________________________________________________ ______

Translation:

Boy - Hello, is Chintu there?

Girl - No

Boy - Give me a chance and he will be.
Urban_Nomad is offline  
Old 15th September 2011, 17:18   #5119
Senior - BHPian
 
n_aditya's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Namma Bengaluru
Posts: 5,344
Thanked: 3,666 Times
Re: The Official Joke thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by SuperSlick View Post
This is from an actual trial in the UK as per an old e-mail forward I received. I've not validated this case though!
Old it is. Has been posted earlier on this thread several pages back.
n_aditya is offline  
Old 15th September 2011, 17:35   #5120
BHPian
 
dre@ms's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: MADRAS
Posts: 638
Thanked: 206 Times
Re: The Official Joke thread

Dear reader,

Please do me right now. On the kitchen table, in your bed, on the couch. Hell, I'll even take the floor in front of the TV, I don't care. I just need you to do me like I've never been done before.

Sincerely, your Homework.

-------------

1. A small boy opens the door and looks at his sister's boy friend and asks innocently
"Every day you come to meet my sister , don't you have your own sister"

2. Santa went for an interview,
Bank manager: What is cyclone ?
Santa: It is the smallest loan given by bank to buy a cycle.

3. Pintu was having a habit of eating nails on his hand, His parents sent him to Ramdev Baba for treatment.
What a miracle, Now Pintu can also eat nails on his legs.

4. Teeth said 2 Tongue "If I just press u little hard, you will get cut.

Tongue replied:

"If I misuse 1 word against some 1, then all the 32 of u will come out at once.

Last edited by dre@ms : 15th September 2011 at 17:39.
dre@ms is offline  
Old 15th September 2011, 17:52   #5121
Senior - BHPian
 
Scorcher's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Trivandrum, KL
Posts: 4,916
Thanked: 7,115 Times
Re: The Official Joke thread

Indian newspaper headlines in 2060:

Kasab dies at 70 in jail of high cholestrol due to too much biryani.

Golmaal part 27 is released, Tusshar Kapoor is still unable to speak or act.

Sharad Pawar owns half the world.

Facebook is declared a country.

A.Raja's son is arrested for 16G scam.

A girl in Delhi travels 50 feet safely.

"Lakshadeep Cats" to be the 63rd team to join IPL.

Munna Hazare sits on fast for Lokpal bill

Scorcher is offline  
Old 15th September 2011, 19:25   #5122
Senior - BHPian
 
anilisanil's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Pune
Posts: 1,420
Thanked: 291 Times
Re: The Official Joke thread

From a friend's FB page!

see no good.
say no good.
hear no good.
do no good! LOL

The Official Joke thread-300093_10150286336547587_572147586_8241792_1152684014_n.jpg
anilisanil is offline  
Old 15th September 2011, 21:17   #5123
Distinguished - BHPian
 
dhanushs's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Chennai
Posts: 4,264
Thanked: 9,789 Times
Re: The Official Joke thread

Woman 1 : How does your husband comes back home on time....??
.
.
.
Women 2 : I have made a rule, I told him . . .
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Romance will start sharp at 9 with or without you.....



Last edited by dhanushs : 15th September 2011 at 21:19.
dhanushs is offline  
Old 15th September 2011, 21:46   #5124
Senior - BHPian
 
Scorcher's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Trivandrum, KL
Posts: 4,916
Thanked: 7,115 Times
Re: The Official Joke thread

Missile Baloons. Super fun. Me want!
Attached Thumbnails
The Official Joke thread-304968_150953974996350_100002452453685_247964_406008243_n.jpg  

Scorcher is offline  
Old 15th September 2011, 22:29   #5125
Senior - BHPian
 
IronH4WK's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Bangalore
Posts: 3,468
Thanked: 4,147 Times
Re: The Official Joke thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scorcher View Post
Missile Baloons. Super fun. Me want!
that'd be the fastest way to clear traffic on the road!!
IronH4WK is offline  
Old 15th September 2011, 23:51   #5126
BANNED
 
Spitfire's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Panaji - Goa/Bangalore - Karnataka
Posts: 3,312
Thanked: 771 Times
Re: The Official Joke thread

Indian Government has a sense of humor.

On Engineer's day they raised the price of petrol exactly by 3.14. i.e. the value of Pi.
Spitfire is offline  
Old 16th September 2011, 10:00   #5127
BHPian
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Mumbai
Posts: 26
Thanked: Once
Re: The Official Joke thread

Q:What's Hyundai i20 a.k.a. (also known as)?
A:Raavan (Because he had 20 eyes- i20)
ceejay123 is offline  
Old 16th September 2011, 10:40   #5128
Senior - BHPian
 
Fordmanchau's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Hyderabad
Posts: 1,666
Thanked: 340 Times
Re: The Official Joke thread

What's the most sought after and precious gift these days to give on anyone's marriage/birthday/Anniversary???

It's a PETROL voucher!!
(the way petrol prices are going upwards)
Fordmanchau is offline  
Old 16th September 2011, 10:41   #5129
Distinguished - BHPian
 
mayankk's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: New Delhi
Posts: 5,139
Thanked: 8,119 Times
Re: The Official Joke thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fordmanchau View Post
What's the most sought after and precious gift these days to give on anyone's marriage/birthday/Anniversary???

It's a PETROL voucher!!
(the way petrol prices are going upwards)

kess of a joke, more of a good idea, actually!!
gift registry should carry 5k vouchers , i suppose.
and a good investment too !!
mayankk is offline  
Old 16th September 2011, 10:57   #5130
Senior - BHPian
 
Fordmanchau's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Hyderabad
Posts: 1,666
Thanked: 340 Times
Re: The Official Joke thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by mayankk View Post
kess of a joke, more of a good idea, actually!!
True!! reminds of a real life incident I had.

In the month of may 2011 after the Rs. 5/- price hike in petrol, I was in Chennai with family travelling in a cab.
My sister then asks her 4yr old son(my nephew) to ask me, what I want for my birthday(due in July).
He asks me, mama tumko birthday par kya gift chahiye??
I reply: "aur kuch nahi beta bus free petrol voucher de dena"

On hearing this even the driver of the cab who was relatively quiet, couldn't stop laughing!!
And now I think I would just make sure that I get the same gift from here on.
Fordmanchau is offline  
Reply

Most Viewed
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Team-BHP.com
Proudly powered by E2E Networks