Team-BHP - Dissuading under-age driving

Quote:

Originally Posted by GTO (Post 4602843)

Great thread, Thoma! My suggestions:

1. "Motivate" instead of "scare" (with accident videos, hospital visits etc.). Tell him why it's better for him to wait & back it up with facts. Also encourage him to read up on driving + cars so that he's well-informed by the time he applies for a driving licence.

2. Agreed with others. Take him go-karting & dirt biking.

I agree with the first one. Scaring tactics dont really "scare" teenagers, in my opinion and experience. If the kid really has a rebellious attitude, then he or she is going to use this as an excuse to get behind the wheel.

But where I dont see a point is, go karting. Teenagers want to go fast. They want to show that they are capable of handling the speed because more speed = more macho. And more macho = more respect from peers.

And if they are exposed to "fast driving" under controlled circumstances, then they might be wanting to drive fast in uncontrolled circumstances as well. Because driving fast in a karting track isnt the same as driving fast on the roads.

So how do you convince a rebellious youngster/teenager that driving fast is acceptable in one scenario, but not in another scenario?!? And how is a driving license going to change this mentality(*)?

(*) - In India atleast where getting a driving license is easy. But the problem I am referencing to isnt with respect to the "permit" to drive. I am talking about the mentality and road discipline in general because a driving license doesnt necessarily mean you are a responsible driver. In India of course.

Quote:

Originally Posted by SS-Traveller (Post 4602303)

Why is this even a question on the forum? How does anyone dissuade one's child from stealing, breaking things, beating up a peer or younger sibling, stabbing someone with a knife... - in fact, how does one stop a sub-adult teenager from indulging in any form of illegal / anti-social behaviour?

If the answer is not available to the parents, they should not have become parents!

Quote:

Originally Posted by thoma (Post 4602352)

Sorry, but I really despise such mentality that 'no one should do anything without knowing everything', and that too especially on becoming parents.

And to all who replied, thanks for chipping in. It's become more difficult to dissuade the child as there has been another under-18 year old kid in the residential area learning to drive.

AFAIK, from April, 2017 several amendments were made in existing MV rules and some new sections are inserted. One of them is Section 199, where any offence by a juvenile will result in the guardian/owner deemed to be guilty and that can lead to penalty of Rs. 25,000 along with 3 years of imprisonment.

While driving without a license is considered as an offence so driving by an underage teen without proper license should fall into the same offence category. I don't know whether this rule is enforced strictly everywhere. But it exists! And that suffices for any parents NOT to allow under-18 kids to drive/ride on public roads for their own as well as others' safety.

For more detailed information, I am attaching the original amendment document. Go to page no. 41 and vide. point no. 84.

Quote:

Originally Posted by thoma (Post 4600790)

He says that his cousin of the same age gets to get behind the wheel once a while on the highway! His parents are a close family friend of ours and even though they are against it, he still persuades them and takes the car out in our private residential area, though he is a confident learner.

I am sorry for sounding pessimistic (maybe even rude, although that's not my intention please:), but IMO the ship has already sailed. As mentioned in the original post that I've highlighted, the parents of these kids are at fault since at the end of the day they let their kids drive.

At the end of the day, its the parents that need to be tough and be strict about not acquiescing to their kids' every other demand. Else sensitising the kids would be of no use if their parents just give into every tantrum. So the parents need to be shown these articles/videos shared in this thread first.

Coming to a generalized point (not pointing to OP's family friends), if such behaviour is tolerated (though may not be encouraged) then it means such kids would not have been drilled about obeying rules and laws in general from a young age. So sensitising them about motor vehicle specific laws at this age won't work. Maybe having a friendly cop talk strictly to the kids or arranging for some staged stoppage/arrest as others have suggested might do something.

India is a country where rule/law breaking is rampant because implementation of said rules are very lax. People break rules when they see others breaking rules and getting away with it easily. The only deterrent comes when rule breakers actually get some punishment, they may not change completely, but atleast they'll think twice about breaking rules the next time. Such people need to realise that laws aren't just some written words and there's actual consequences when rules are broken.

Quoting Merovingian from the movie Matrix Reloaded -

Dissuading under-age driving-howtostandincausenoteffect_infographic_main.jpg

Ola Comrade! A couple of insights from a past offender I knew too well.

He started driving at 16 due to some family issues not the usual teenage-rebellion crap, didn't have anyone to teach him driving at the time hence reading and limited YouTube content was his only solace. He did turn out to be a better driver than most adults, the kind of reflexes you have when you're young is just astounding to say the least.

But in spite of all that he still gets the shivers thinking of the times when things got out of hand.

1. After having driven for most of his time solo he once had to drive with the car fully loaded and on braking experienced the front end break traction, something which would never happen when he'd be driving solo, since this was in Kollam traffic and there was a motorcycle in front of him, his reflexes went into overdrive and he shook off some inertia by turning the wheel both ways, the car came to a halt a few centimeters from the motorcycle pillions behind. He later imagined what would've been if the car would've hit the motorcycle and if the pillion was pregnant, he knows he would not have been able to live with the guilt.

2. He usually drives sane but one time stupidity got the best of him, mostly due to his co-passenger encouraging him. He upshifted just as he bounced off the limiter in 3rd and onto the 4th gear when it started raining hard just like that. He braked just as he would but this road was still under construction, add the wetness and before he knew it the car was caught in a nasty spin, since this the Asramam-Link Road on one side there's the Ashtamudi Lake and on the other was mush, the reflexes did kick in and amidst the confusion he jammed the thing into 1st and popped the clutch when the throttle floored in just about when the car pointed away from the lakeside, the car broke free of the spin and shot out into the mush nose first.

Cops came to the scene and so did the recovery crane, they checked the car for liquor after pulling it out of the mush, didn't find anything as he was sensible enough to not be that stupid, luckily the cops brushed it off as a mishap due to the rains.

Now it didn't hit him until he got back home when he recounted the incident and thought of the other possible outcomes, while spinning out of control he could've taken out another road user/pedestrian, or could've driven straight into the lake and drowned, or both.

3. By this time he thought he'd seen it all until an Interstate Bus coming at multiples of the city speed limit from the opposite direction got into his lane on a corner and rammed him off the road, the local auto people immediately stopped the bus and started to manhandle the driver and asked him to call the cops and register a case against the driver of the bus, in spite of the shock and literal shivers he managed to plead with the auto drivers to let the guy off without making a scene due to him being the prima facie offender going by the law.

All in all he is grateful that fate was on his side on those days as he knows of other people from the 'Cooler' shades of the social spectrum who weren't as lucky as him when trying to garner some cheap attention.

If the above account doesn't bring a change to the kids outlook then I'm out of options to help you, though I know one thing for sure, aggression is never the way to go, when you're young you have that "Jo Bura Hai Woh Dil Ko Lagta Bhala Hai" air around you and you'd simply be triggering it with aggression.

Hope things turn out fruitful.
Cheers,
A.P.

Quote:

Originally Posted by thoma (Post 4600790)

I want some material/media in dissuading a 15 year old from driving without license. He says that his cousin of the same age gets to get behind the wheel once a while on the highway! His parents are a close family friend of ours and even though they are against it, he still persuades them and takes the car out in our private residential area, though he is a confident learner.

I do not want to sound harsh or act the police, as he in his teens is an adamant guy. I've already mentioned that it's the parents who will be penalised for any mishap.

What I'm looking for is material from the authorities mentioning the penalty, or any videos that can change his view.

Dear thoma,

This is a very interesting thread. Very tricky too! I have read all the posts. I am impressed by the various ways of thinking. I could not find anybody who was condoning the 'child's' behavior! I guess the people on TBHP are a class apart. At the same time, I hope the general society has the same trend!

I do not think I have a 'solution' for you. I can share my personal experiences. Please take the part(s) which you like. Please feel free to ignore the rest! No offense intended, no offense given and no offense taken!

When I was at that age, I had a friend who was driving TRUCKS (that to army trucks) - because his father was the Motor Transport Office in the Army. He went onto become lt. Col. working on Army Tanks. Anyway, we were a group of friends and other than him none of us were tempted. I am no expert to say why that happened. Maybe we saw our parents living by some standards and we did not listen to them - we watched them and followed them!

I learnt driving at 21+.

Anyway, cut to a couple of decades later! I overheard my wife and daughters talking. My daughter was telling my wife about some conversation that she had in school. Some of her friends had started driving. She was telling my wife that she had told here friends that she would 'never' do anything illegal like that. She gave multiple reasons to her friends, which included:

She was sure her father would not approve. (By the way, I have never hit / spanked my children! They are very close to me.)
She was sure that 'at the right time' she would anyway get her 'rights'.
She felt that it was better to learn from her father.
She had seen how I taught my wife and felt that those inputs (in addition to the Training School input) were necessary.
She felt that it was 'fun' to make the learning a 'family event'.

Oh! By the way, in usual way, her younger sister followed her steps. That is, she waited - got her 2-wheeler license and an Activa too at the 'right' age!

Anyway, to cut a long story short - I feel that a lot of 'human' inputs that parents have to put in. I feel that too many parents now feel that they were deprived and their children should not be. I feel that is okay, but there has to be some acceptance of limits too! Kids now-a-days are much smarter that in the previous generations. They can see if their parents say one thing and do another! For example, I see many of my friends who don't read but expect their children to read! It does not work that way friends! Some of my friends break rules and tell that proudly to their families. Then they preach to their children! I keep telling them that they are not convincing!

Anyway, it is never easy! I will be following this thread. I expect to learn somethings new.

I just re-read what I have written above. It seems too long! If you have reached here, then many thanks!

Please do not read any criticism into this. Please do not take offense. I am just trying to help.

Regards,

Girish Mahajan

Quote:

Originally Posted by GTO (Post 4602843)

3. Tell him to focus on girls instead :).

I'm 16 years old right now, and I had the exact same attitude before, mentioned by the OP, and my parents were very strict in not giving me the wheels.

If one thing has helped me to stay away from the drivers seat until I am 18 years old, educate me on different scams played by people to extort money, give me a different perspective on how road fights can turn into a real disaster, help me gain knowledge of anything related to cars, tell me how to change and clean cars and it's components on my own, help me develop my still noob vocabulary and writing skills, it is Team-BHP.

After coming upon Team-BHP
1. I always wear seatbelts
2. I always wear helmets as a pillion, which my family doesn't like. They say that it takes a lot of time to first wear the covering hoodie thing, then install the visor, and finally put the locks in place. They just use a simple helmet and do not lock the chin-straps.
3. I don't ask keys to the car, unlike previous times, where I always complain about me not getting to drive the vehicle, when most of my friends' parents have no problem in letting them drive. Some of my friends own bikes too.
4. Many other things which has enhanced my knowledge and maturity

And yes, focusing on girls now is not a bad ideaclap:agree:

So bottom-line, introducing him to Team-BHP can change the situation.
Sorry for the little off-topic post