Stupid questions with the smart answers

2fast2furious · 16th July 2004, 18:15

STUPID QUESTIONS WITH THE SMART ANSWERS:

BOY : May I hold your hand?
GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy.

GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me!
BOY : You love me...

GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring??
BOY : Sure, what's your phone number??

GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest.
BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple

GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever.
BOY : Don't you ever want to improve??

BOY : I love you and I could die for you!
GIRL : How soon??

BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you!
GIRL : Yes, but would you stay there??

SHARON : Have you ever had a hot passionate, burning kiss??
TRACY : I did once. He'd forgotten to take the cigarette out of his mouth.

MAN : You remind me of the sea.
WOMAN : Because I'm wild, romantic and exciting?
MAN : NO, because you make me sick.

WIFE : You tell a man something, it goes in one ear and comes out of the other.
HUSBAND : You tell a woman something: It goes in both ears and comes out of the mouth.

MARY : John says I'm pretty. Andy says I'm ugly.What do u think,
Peter?
PETER : A bit of both. I think you're pretty ugly.

1) Girlfriend : "...And are you sure you love me and no one else ?"
Boyfriend : "Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday".

2) Teacher : "Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?"
Pupil : "The moon".
Teacher : "Why?"
Pupil : "The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we don't need it".

3) Teacher : "What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?"
Pupil : "A teacher".

4) Waiter : "Would you like your coffee black?"
Customer : "What other colors do you have?"

5) My father is so old that when he was in school, history was called current affairs.

6) Teacher : "Sam, you talk a lot !"
Sam : "It's a family tradition".
Teacher : "What do you mean?"
Sam : "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher".
Teacher : "What about your mother?"
Sam : "She's a woman".

7) Tom : "How should I convey the news to my father that I've failed?"
David: "You just send a telegram: Result declared, past year's performance repeated".

8) Teacher : "Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing?"
Student : "Brotherly love".

9) Teacher : "Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?"
Sam : "No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook".

10) Patient : "What are the chances of my recovering doctor?"
Doctor : "One hundred percent. Medical records show that nine out of ten people die of the disease you have. Yours is the tenth case I've treated. The others all died".

11) Teacher : " Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
One Student : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day and at the same time."

12) Teacher : " George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it.
Now do you know why his father didn't punish him ?"
One Student: " Because George still had the axe in is hand."

2f2f

Shan2nu · 16th July 2004, 18:33

LOL!!!

Keep 'em coming dude...........

Regards...
Shan2nu

GTO · 16th July 2004, 18:35

I'll tell you another real-life stupid question of the decade. Whenever I am in a cinema, and come out for a snack during the break....I meet an acquantaince and he/she asks me "So what are you doing here?" or the same thing in hindi.

What am I doing here? What do you think I am doing in a movie hall? LOL

GTO

shravan316 · 16th July 2004, 18:38

normally_crazy · 16th July 2004, 23:40

hey gto,

every time a frnd of mine comes home and finds me sleeping..wakes me up and then asks ...soo raha tha kya ??

cheers

Rehaan · 18th July 2004, 23:31

Or (in this age where everyone is so used to mobile phones) a friend will call me on my home number and say "where are you?"

Rudra Sen · 20th July 2004, 18:43

This is real life situation..
wife: Tell me what exactly do you like, my beautiful face or my gorgeuos body?
Husband: I like your sense of humour.

Jaggu · 20th July 2004, 19:18

good one rudra

VTEC11 · 20th July 2004, 22:09

Quote:

Originally Posted by [b

Quote[/b] (GTO @ July 16 2004,17:05)]I'll tell you another real-life stupid question of the decade. Whenever I am in a cinema, and come out for a snack during the break....I meet an acquantaince and he/she asks me "So what are you doing here?" or the same thing in hindi.

What am I doing here? What do you think I am doing in a movie hall? LOL

GTO

soooooooo true. happens all the time. Go figure.

Aditya · 22nd August 2004, 19:03

My girlfriend keeps calling me up at my office and asks me, "What are you doing?" What does one do at office anyway? These days I've got a ready answer for her, "I'm here on a picnic."

dipen · 23rd August 2004, 02:18

Quote:

Originally Posted by [b

Quote[/b] (Aditya @ Aug. 22 2004,17:33)]My girlfriend keeps calling me up at my office and asks me, "What are you doing?" What does one do at office anyway? These days I've got a ready answer for her, "I'm here on a picnic."

friends call me in office and ask " are u working OR KAm kar raha hai kya ?"

GTO · 23rd August 2004, 13:35

With the amount of time I see us full time professionals spending on Team-BHP during the day....its really not a stupid question

GTO

Rudra Sen · 23rd August 2004, 14:33

Cmon GTO, we work really hard and well, at times hardly work also

16th July 2004, 18:15	#1
2fast2furious BHPian Join Date: May 2004 Location: Delhi Posts: 66 Thanked: 3 Times	STUPID QUESTIONS WITH THE SMART ANSWERS: BOY : May I hold your hand? GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy. GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me! BOY : You love me... GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring?? BOY : Sure, what's your phone number?? GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest. BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever. BOY : Don't you ever want to improve?? BOY : I love you and I could die for you! GIRL : How soon?? BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you! GIRL : Yes, but would you stay there?? SHARON : Have you ever had a hot passionate, burning kiss?? TRACY : I did once. He'd forgotten to take the cigarette out of his mouth. MAN : You remind me of the sea. WOMAN : Because I'm wild, romantic and exciting? MAN : NO, because you make me sick. WIFE : You tell a man something, it goes in one ear and comes out of the other. HUSBAND : You tell a woman something: It goes in both ears and comes out of the mouth. MARY : John says I'm pretty. Andy says I'm ugly.What do u think, Peter? PETER : A bit of both. I think you're pretty ugly. 1) Girlfriend : "...And are you sure you love me and no one else ?" Boyfriend : "Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday". 2) Teacher : "Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?" Pupil : "The moon". Teacher : "Why?" Pupil : "The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we don't need it". 3) Teacher : "What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?" Pupil : "A teacher". 4) Waiter : "Would you like your coffee black?" Customer : "What other colors do you have?" 5) My father is so old that when he was in school, history was called current affairs. 6) Teacher : "Sam, you talk a lot !" Sam : "It's a family tradition". Teacher : "What do you mean?" Sam : "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher". Teacher : "What about your mother?" Sam : "She's a woman". 7) Tom : "How should I convey the news to my father that I've failed?" David: "You just send a telegram: Result declared, past year's performance repeated". 8) Teacher : "Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing?" Student : "Brotherly love". 9) Teacher : "Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?" Sam : "No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook". 10) Patient : "What are the chances of my recovering doctor?" Doctor : "One hundred percent. Medical records show that nine out of ten people die of the disease you have. Yours is the tenth case I've treated. The others all died". 11) Teacher : " Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?" One Student : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day and at the same time." 12) Teacher : " George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him ?" One Student: " Because George still had the axe in is hand." 2f2f
	() Thanks

16th July 2004, 18:33	#2
Shan2nu Senior - BHPian Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Hubli - Karnata Posts: 5,533 Thanked: 125 Times View My Garage	LOL!!! Keep 'em coming dude........... Regards... Shan2nu
	() Thanks

16th July 2004, 18:35	#3
GTO Team-BHP Support Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Bombay Posts: 70,497 Thanked: 300,308 Times View My Garage	I'll tell you another real-life stupid question of the decade. Whenever I am in a cinema, and come out for a snack during the break....I meet an acquantaince and he/she asks me "So what are you doing here?" or the same thing in hindi. What am I doing here? What do you think I am doing in a movie hall? LOL GTO
	() Thanks

16th July 2004, 18:38	#4
shravan316 Senior - BHPian Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Bangalore Posts: 1,029 Thanked: 9 Times
	() Thanks

16th July 2004, 23:40	#5
normally_crazy Senior - BHPian Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Mumbai Posts: 4,369 Thanked: 528 Times View My Garage	hey gto, every time a frnd of mine comes home and finds me sleeping..wakes me up and then asks ...soo raha tha kya ?? cheers
	() Thanks

18th July 2004, 23:31	#6
Rehaan Team-BHP Support Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Bombay Posts: 24,039 Thanked: 34,069 Times	Or (in this age where everyone is so used to mobile phones) a friend will call me on my home number and say "where are you?"
	() Thanks

20th July 2004, 18:43	#7
Rudra Sen Team-BHP Support Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Bangalore Posts: 11,588 Thanked: 6,530 Times View My Garage	This is real life situation.. wife: Tell me what exactly do you like, my beautiful face or my gorgeuos body? Husband: I like your sense of humour.
	() Thanks

20th July 2004, 19:18	#8
Jaggu Team-BHP Support Join Date: May 2004 Location: Bangalore Posts: 20,212 Thanked: 15,892 Times	good one rudra
	() Thanks

22nd August 2004, 19:03	#10
Aditya Team-BHP Support Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Mumbai Posts: 17,804 Thanked: 76,768 Times View My Garage	My girlfriend keeps calling me up at my office and asks me, "What are you doing?" What does one do at office anyway? These days I've got a ready answer for her, "I'm here on a picnic."
	() Thanks

23rd August 2004, 13:35	#12
GTO Team-BHP Support Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Bombay Posts: 70,497 Thanked: 300,308 Times View My Garage	With the amount of time I see us full time professionals spending on Team-BHP during the day....its really not a stupid question GTO
	() Thanks

23rd August 2004, 14:33	#13
Rudra Sen Team-BHP Support Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Bangalore Posts: 11,588 Thanked: 6,530 Times View My Garage	Cmon GTO, we work really hard and well, at times hardly work also
	() Thanks