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Old 28th August 2019, 23:22   #31
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Default Re: My experience of getting fired!

Really appreciate the open mind with which you've penned down your experience. This is something that is always on the mind of young corporates like me and to read someone else overcoming it is extremely inspiring. I find that not just me, but most of my colleagues think of not if, but when such a corporate decision will be made on our jobs. It's especially worrying seeing the huge extent of AI and automation that's happening across verticals. You also mentioned hobbies-something that i too haven't found time to spend on after getting a job but this could be what keeps up afloat if things go downhill for us at some point in time. Lovely closure to your post and yes, family is the most important thing that matters.
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Old 28th August 2019, 23:36   #32
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Like most others who have been in this boat before, I can totally relate to each and every word you've written.

I've been through it once and was racked by self doubt and worry. Was debt free and without any fixed liabilities but still the fear of being jobless and without an income was frightening to be honest.

Got lucky and found a job with one of my ex colleagues for a firm I never knew existed, and then I realized how complacent I had become. Lady luck really smiled cos I got a severance and got hired without any break. So ended up with some decent savings from the lay off, but boy was it frightful during the time I was informed about the lay off. Almost thought I was gonna kill some of my ex colleagues in anger.

Taught me an invaluable lesson, never expect a firm to take care of me.

All the best buddy. Loved your writing style.
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Old 28th August 2019, 23:49   #33
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Default Re: My experience of getting fired!

Been through this once, some nine years back. The lesson learned is "nobody is indispensable ".

Lay off these days is so common in India. Job security in IT jobs is now almost a myth. Some companies axe people every six months. Some people rejoin at a higher level in the company that axed them.

You are lucky if you get a good severance package and you are able to land up in a new job quickly. You can at least pay out some part of your liabilities- be it home or vehicle loan.
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Old 29th August 2019, 05:11   #34
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Default Re: My experience of getting fired!

Thanks for posting your experience. Wishing you well in the new job and in life.

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Originally Posted by selfdrive View Post
- This job is only a means to earn money. It does not define who I am, neither for me nor my family and friends. For everything else, you have hobbies.
- Family and health matter. Friends and happiness too. Nothing else does.
- For any organisation, you are completely dispensable. Keep your employers dispensable too. No point in getting attached or over committed.
To me maturity at work is understanding the above points. The sooner you understand these, the better you are. Anyone who slogs odd hours for the company, avoiding your near and dear ones, please note that they are the only ones who would be with you through thick and thin.

Equally important is to keep yourselves up to date within your field of work. Or have a back up plan, in case you have to let go. Who knows the back up plan may end up being better than your original plan.

Last edited by basilmabraham : 29th August 2019 at 05:13.
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Old 29th August 2019, 06:18   #35
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Originally Posted by selfdrive View Post
Family support was crucial at this time. My wife took it in her stride and seemed most confident that we will tide over. Both children were happy that I would not be commuting long hours. None of them seemed concerned about it. Perhaps I was averaging out the worry meters for all of us. In terms of my habits, I had almost stopped going out. Even the smallest of expenses started worrying me. One day, the family just dragged me out to a store. While roaming in the aisles, my daughter asked me to buy a doll. This was new, because she normally never asks for anything. That only made me feel worse for trying to put off the purchase. It was not unaffordable, but at the time it seemed like an unnecessary expense. Surprisingly for me, she just agreed with me and said you can buy it for me later. Kids are definitely resilient when the situation presents itself. While I was fuming on the inside about being in a situation where I denied her something, I was also proud of her having reacted that way.
Dear Sir, Thank you so much for sharing your bitter phase of life with all of us. You are a strong person. The above quoted paragraph of yours' made me weak and I cried. You and your wife are wonderful parents and your children are very precious gifts of God.

You will rise like a Phoenix. God bless you and wish you and your family the best of luck and remember we are all here for you
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Old 29th August 2019, 07:58   #36
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Default Re: My experience of getting fired!

First of all, thanks everyone for reading through what I had to say. Also appreciate you reaching out here on this thread or through personal messaging/ voice calls/ texts. Some of you have been in touch but still took time out to contact and reassure me after I posted here, that really means a lot to me.
I will continue to try and respond individually to your messages. Some of your observations bring out topics which I have not included in my original post and would be useful to elaborate.

As a sole breadearner, it is more challenging to face such situations. The best insurance against this would be to develop another source of income and/ or build a corpus for a rainy day. Even if we are not the sole breadearner, the loss of face is one of the biggest challenges we face as the economic situation evolves. It needs a lot of support from family and friends as the affected person is too occupied and may not speak up or ask for help proactively.

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Originally Posted by Durango Dude View Post
All the best and get your daughter her doll she deserves it.
I did
While I would be as heartbroken if my son was in that situation, for dads daughters do have a special place.

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Originally Posted by sukiwa View Post
Thanks for penning this down, kudos to your spirit. I had asked you to utilise same writing skill in composing your resume.
Unfortunately that is the one topic I hate writing.

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Originally Posted by vinit.merchant View Post
Have grown a little complacent and fallen into the comfort zone spending almost a decade in the same org.
My suggestion would be to keep looking out for other opportunities. It keeps us on our toes and also abreast of what is happening in the market.

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Originally Posted by V.Narayan View Post
Other than the money it is the shift in status in our own eyes that is the most difficult to handle and which needs an inner re-orientation.
That de linking of the person from their job is quite necessary. Unfortunately most discussions of late revolve around what you do/ how much you earn.

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Originally Posted by smartindboy View Post
Loved your closure. All the best.
Yes, I was waiting to have such a moment. As I mentioned, I am not one to forgive/ forget though I would not go looking for vengeance.

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Originally Posted by K_Drive View Post
As APJ once said "Love your job. Not your company".
Very true. Anyone anywhere can cut you down giving an excuse of being a corporate decision.

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Originally Posted by the_skyliner View Post
You need not to worry about getting a job, you can be a columnist and a good one too.
I need to work towards that. If only there was a career that paid for writing. It would be great if you could point me in a relevant direction.

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Originally Posted by comfortablynumb View Post
It's to your credit that you never became overly bitter or cynical during this phase, at least when we talked.
You think it is possible to be more cynical than I already am? I think I was distracted by traffic whenever we talked during your abductions for our commute.

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Originally Posted by rajivr1612 View Post
But one thing that has helped is not to burn bridges when resigning from a company no matter whatever grudges you may hold.
Some of my friends suggested the same to me. I have a contrary approach, regardless of my situation I do not ever want to be associated with such people. It is not as if they were trying to help me. Such people do need to be put in their place, else they keep putting themselves on a high pedestal.

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Originally Posted by BlackPearl View Post
All's well that ends well. You have come out stronger after this ordeal and that is something to cherish. It is safe to say now that it was a boon in disguise!
Regarding the faceloss part, I believe that is how we have been brought up and how our society preceives this thing.
At a point I also considered other options for starting something of my own instead of working for someone else again. However, the comfort zone of having a monthly paycheck is an addiction hard to get rid of.
Of course, getting fired is something we are embarrassed to mention to anyone. Many companies get away with such firing because of our hesitation to say we were fired. In such cases, we end up taking the blame though the situation has almost nothing to do with us. Other than the fact that we were too loyal to continue so for so long.
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Old 29th August 2019, 08:21   #37
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Selfdrive - You touched a very raw nerve with your post. I was reading your post when I was packing for the day yesterday and wanted to reply immediately but decided to do it today. When I was going through your posts, all the scenes way 6 yrs back suddenly flooded before my eyes when I went through a similar situation. The agony, the desperation, the anxiety, the helplessness all emotions I went through were totally relatable with your posts. Luckily at that time for me a new opportunity was in the process of being created and I was offered the same considering my association with the co and the relationship I had with a few senior management, I grabbed with both hands only to realize 6 yrs down the line I will again be with a sword hanging over my head.

My company in Mumbai is winding off in December 2019 and I was facing an uncertainty not far from now. The Bangalore job which I recently accepted is a compromise purely from the fact that being a lone bread earner, I had to bring home the cash somehow. The fact that I didn't have a proper CV, no Linkedin account nor any assurance that at this age I would be even considered for any attractive/interesting opportunity made me even more unsettled and unstable. This time I took help of my friends, colleagues, senior management to help me with a decent CV and I got a lot of whole hearted support for that. My family during the previous time as well as this was my greatest pillar of strength especially my wife, the kind of support she gave was beyond words.

All through this time I have realized that self confidence plays a big part in making or breaking you. I believed in myself and kept assuring myself that things will be fine and these are things which need to be done to get back the good days. I still remember explaining the 2012 situation in one of the interviews highlighting all the positiveness and how I came out of it and the interviewer appreciating it when he congratulated me on getting the Bangalore job. Then I learned that I need to use Resilience as one of the best soft skills I had learnt.

You have done a marvellous job, keep believing in yourself, make things better transparent to friends and family and I am sure you wont have to start a similar thread again. All the best buddy.
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Old 29th August 2019, 08:37   #38
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Default Re: My experience of getting fired!

A very well written experience which exactly reflects the state of mind of anyone who has gone through this. I have seen a couple of my friends being fired, unfortunately they were not so lucky to get a job during their notice period.

We take salary for granted, get all types of loans and sings tales of "you only live once" to justify extravagance. One's life is not only for him but for the dependents too. Financial crisis at wrong time will permanently damage the growth path of whole family especially children. Of course this applies even more to salaried middle class of India.
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Old 29th August 2019, 08:48   #39
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Thanks for penning this down. It takes a lot of courage to do so. Happy to hear that you landed a new job quickly. The way a company handles the situation when people are to be laid off for no fault of theirs speaks volumes of their ethics. Most lay offs happen due to wrong decisions taken by the management, but unfortunately it is people down the line who bear the brunt of it. Anyways the good part is that all this is behind you now. Wishing you all the very best in your new role, and a thumbs up to you and your wife for raising such a wonderful daughter.

Last edited by longhorn : 29th August 2019 at 08:50.
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Old 29th August 2019, 09:18   #40
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KL01toKA03 View Post
You might have been feeling low, and they might have respected your space by avoiding a conversation which could further hurt your feelings.
My team was speaking with me regularly. A few of them whom I was mentoring also actively looked out for other roles and resigned during my notice period. Other peers, HR etc were least bothered. If they did not speak it was not due to concern but more due to lack of concern.

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Originally Posted by speedmiester View Post
Thanks Selfdrive for sharing this incidence.
As someone who is associated closely with HR and Talent Acquisition teams, I can fully understand the dread and feelings one go through in such circumstances.
I do my maximum best when people ask for reference and introduction. It's the least I could do to help someone in need.
Yes, HR is the lightning rod in such situations attracting all the bad press. But this is exactly where they should be more proactive. I would have preferred the communication to come either from my boss or the HR. Not from someone parachuted in just to convey the message. They might as well have emailed me, which of course they did not as they want it to seem as voluntary attrition.
I always respond to people who approach me for referrals. Not responding is the worst thing one can do. If it is not feasible to refer, it is better to state clearly and offer encouragement than to just ignore pleas for assistance.

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Originally Posted by raksrules View Post
I want to speak from other side of this where I have been sometimes contemplating leaving my Job and staying home or doing something else lighter.
That is completely subjective, there are just too many factors involved. You may want to consider any option available for taking a sabbatical.

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Originally Posted by am1m View Post
I'm sure the thought crosses almost every working persons mind. I think of quitting at least a couple of times a week!
The grass always seeming greener on the other side does not help.

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Originally Posted by Thermodynamics View Post
Along with my first month salary, I got the news of my kid's arrival. Can never forget those moments
Glad you pulled through and were able to enjoy one of the most memorable life changing moments without worry.

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Originally Posted by Thermodynamics View Post
At the same time I wouldn't say all HR are bad, I knew an HR lady who was given this unfortunate job to handle layoffs. She cried she can't handle, but this is the system, she has to do.
I would not like to paint them all with the same brush either. But in that place at that time, when I expected support from them, I got zilch. I was not expecting them to save my job role for me. But they could have helped me handle it better or given me some advance notice. I would not have bought a car on loan. His response was you can always sell it off. Highly insensitive.

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Originally Posted by naveenroy View Post
I can only imagine the stressful times - esp when you suddenly realize that everyone at work starts to treat you differently. And again I say it, HR are the worst of the lot in a company.
In my case, they definitely were. My wife cannot work due to health issues. We were also coping with this for the last few years. Again, while I do not expect them to avoid firing me for this reason any advance notice or a heads up would have been helpful.
What goes around, comes around. A couple of them got fired too and are reaching out for help.

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Originally Posted by StarrySky View Post
The company provides support for the affected employees beyond the severance package. This is in the form of training (to help apply for a different role in the company or outside the company) or even help to set up something on your own.
Wow, that is indeed a plan that seems thought through and implemented well. It does not seem like a hire and fire place that does not care for their employees. On the other side we have people who think that employees should not have any say in company matters and are dispensable. I think it is best we assume this as the worst case scenario and prepare ourselves accordingly. No use expecting anyone to be sensitive.

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Originally Posted by SoumenD View Post
Your experience was scary!!! Having just changed my 8 year old perfectly fine car(<40k on odo) with a new one on loan, this gives me jitters.
Off-Topic:
Question to experienced folks : Is it justified investing in MFs while you still have loans running? Or is it better to first accumulate as much as possible to close the loans(atleast car loan) & then continue investing. Home loan atleast gives some tax benefits.
I have a homeloan too. I now think that the tax benefits are only carrots being dangled for a debt trap. It does not make sense for any of us to live beyond our means or keep upgrading cars/ homes. Definitely not at the cost of selling our souls/ careers/ most of our working lives for these things.
In my case, I now intend to finish off my loans and then take things from there.

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Originally Posted by NiInJa View Post
The only way to shield yourself from such things is keep on learning new things even if you are climbing up the ladder, you never know when it will come to your rescue
There is a limit to how much you can keep learning/ evolving. Eventually age catches up and you are left competing with younger people who have a better knack for such things.
Ideally I would want to exit this industry in the short to medium term as I dont find it sustainable to keep jumping through hoops all the time. In other countries, experience is valued. Here it is a millstone tied to our necks.

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Originally Posted by shrey25 View Post
Your thread was an eye opener for me as I never intended to take up this job and I wanted to do an Mba and be over with my studies and then work.
You will not like to hear this, but most junior/ fresher recruitment is done due to costs and flexibility. One part of it is reduced costs (at subjective cost to quality) but the other is that freshers are not expected to be rigid about location/ shift timings/ travel or other logistics. Basically you are expected to be continually available for longer at less costs than a local/ senior resource. I would recommend you to look for an opportunity that you are able to manage along with your personal commitments. Expecting anyone to help internally or banking on assurances given by someone may not turn out as expected.
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Old 29th August 2019, 09:26   #41
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Default Re: My experience of getting fired!

Thanks for writing on a topic that people usually don't discuss with others and thanks for being so honest with your expressions.
Although I have not been in such a situation myself, but when I look back I think I was a bit close to one some 12 years back having left my 'good' PSU job trying to be a bit adventurous driven by thoughts like 'if others are able to earn four times what I am earning today, doing the same job, why shouldn't I too take the plunge?'.
One thing I must say is being able to keep oneself debt free to the extent possible and manageable, is very essential if we are in the private sector where anything could happen tomorrow.
And I think it is good to keep checking out for oneself intermittently on where one stands in the market outside and be ready to cut off the umbilicals on a short notice. As many of the readers have said one can't relax thinking of being a star performer; I have heard many organizations which have been ruthless with some of such people.
Regards
Sravan
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Old 29th August 2019, 10:39   #42
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Originally Posted by raksrules View Post
I want to speak from other side of this where I have been sometimes contemplating leaving my Job and staying home or doing something else lighter. I am in IT and am about 35-36 years old. Have spent 14 years working in one of the top Indian IT companies and now recently I shifted to another one in Mumbai. The daily grind is really something that gets me. I don't drive a car and travel by company bus...
Am I you? Anyways, you are not doing any such things till you are 45-yo at least. Just go through it with peace and calm knowing that everything ends one day. I quit around 3 times a day and still show up in the morning against enormous headwinds. That's what it is and that's how it is. There are no shortcuts. What you are feeling is extremely natural given the state of things. You are not an exception.
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Old 29th August 2019, 11:25   #43
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Originally Posted by selfdrive View Post
As a sole breadearner, it is more challenging to face such situations. The best insurance against this would be to develop another source of income and/ or build a corpus for a rainy day. Even if we are not the sole breadearner, the loss of face is one of the biggest challenges we face as the economic situation evolves. It needs a lot of support from family and friends as the affected person is too occupied and may not speak up or ask for help proactively.
This is one thing that I don't like in many of my male colleagues and team mates. Highly egoistic behavior IMO- so much so that after they got married, they have got their working wives to leave their job. they say "When I'm earning well, my wife need not take stress". Even though majority of them don't have other sources of income.

Of course there are other cases like no other person at home to take care of the kid, wife not willing to work etc. But that is a minority. Having another earning member is so important for such times and it is highly probable that everyone will face such a situation in their professional life at least once.

According to my observation, this happens every decade and if you pass through, you're mostly set for another decade.
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Old 29th August 2019, 11:32   #44
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Originally Posted by hemanth.anand View Post
...after they got married, they have got their working wives to leave their job
This still happens?! In this day and age?! Amazing.

We don't have kids, but even if we did, am pretty sure there is no way my wife would consider leaving her job, and I can't imagine asking her to quit! My mom raised two kids without stopping working, my sister raised her son too and still continues to work. So it is really quite surprising for me to hear that guys actually can get their wives to stop going to work.

And yeah in these expensive and uncertain times, why would a family voluntarily shut off any additional source of income?
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Old 29th August 2019, 11:44   #45
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Originally Posted by am1m View Post
This still happens?! In this day and age?! Amazing.

We don't have kids, but even if we did, am pretty sure there is no way my wife would consider leaving her job, and I can't imagine asking her to quit! My mom raised two kids without stopping working, my sister raised her son too and still continues to work. So it is really quite surprising for me to hear that guys actually can get their wives to stop going to work.

And yeah in these expensive and uncertain times, why would a family voluntarily shut off any additional source of income?
I guess this is a matter of perception. Like you, I too grew up seeing my mom raise two kids without quitting her job. My wife was raised up in a family where her mom did not work. She wanted to quit her job when our second child was born. We weren't having any financial difficulties at that time, but I still managed to convince her to not throw away her career. I guess arguments could be made in favor of either side, and I still don't think there is absolute correctness on either side.
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