What does these names stands for

toyota · 26th March 2004, 15:36

HYUNDAI-Hope You Understand Nothing's Driveable And Inexpensive...
VW-Virtually Worthless.
AUDI- Always Unsafe Designs Implemented.
BMW-Big Money Works.
* Brutal Money Waster.
* Bimbette Motor Weapon.
* Break My Window.
BUICK-Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer.
CHEVROLET- Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips.
* Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time.
* Cheap Heap, Every Valve Rattles, Oil Leaks Every Time.
*Condition Hopeless, Entire Vehicle Relies On Leftover Engine Technology.
DODGE-Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere.
*Dem Old Dudes Go Everywhere.
*Dead or Dying Gas Eater.
*Dear Old Dad's Geriatric Express.
FIAT- Failure in Italian Automotive Technology.
*Fix It All the Time.
*Fix it again, Tony!
FORD - First On Recall Day.
*Fixed Or Repaired Daily.
*First On Rust and Deterioration.
*Fix Or Repair Daily.
*Found On Road, Dead.
*Fast Only Rolling Downhill.
*Features O.J. and Ron's DNA.
*Found On Russian Dump.
GM- General Maintenance.
* Great Mistake.
* GMC- Garage Man's Companion.
* Got A Mechanic Coming?.
HONDA - Had One Never Did Again.
MAZDA- Most Always Zipping Dangerously Along.
OLDSMOBILE-Old Ladies Driving Slowly Make Others Behind *Infuriatingly Late Everywhere.
Overpriced, Leisurely Driven Sedan Made Of Buick's Irregular Leftover Equipment.
PINTO - Put in new transmission often.
PONTIAC - Poor old Neanderthal thinks its a Cadillac.
SAAB-Send Another Automobile Back.
*Swedish Automobiles Always Breakdown.
*Sorry Arsed Auto Builders.
TOYOTA-Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto.
VOLVO- Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object.
*Vehicles Of Low Velocity Owners.

toyota · 26th March 2004, 16:11

This is not for Santro owners .

A man which has a broken tranny in a new Automatic Santro comes back to the shop were he bought the car and he uses his guarantee on the vehicle. When the mechanic asks how this could happen he shows them. He went to a racetrack were he drove the car at 120 mph but he sais " i am using the D for driving but i am on a race track so lets use the R for racing!

How will you atleast make it appear like Santro accelerate from 0-100 km in 15 Sec .
A- Park a UNO parallel to Santro , select the reverse gear in UNO and press hard on the accelerator . As you go back in the Uno , you can see Santro .....

Whats the difference between Santro and Police station ?
A - It is less embarrassing when you leave a police station .

What does pages 20 - 25 contain in Santros Ownersmanual ?
A- How Yoga helps in handling embarrassment .

What is the sport-version of Santro ?
A- The driver wears Nike shoes.

How do you double the value of a Santro?
A- Fill up the half filled fuel tank .

How do you make a Santro look good?
Park it between two old Sipani

What to you call a santro with brakes?
A- Customized.

What is the Santro owner's most ardent wish?
A: To buy a car.

I can see you've got a new car - a Santro!
Yes, I won the second prize in a lottery.
What was the first prize then?
A fruit-basket!

Santro will be introducing three new vehicles next year.þþ They will have a moped called an "I Go". They will have a
þþþþþþþþ 4-door called a "We Go". They will also have a new station wagon called the "Y'all Go".

How did Santro provide safety at low cost ?
A- Instead of an air bag, there is a whoopee cushion taped to your steering wheel.

How did Santro Improve its brakes without ABS.
Gave a pair of Nike shoes with extra rubber for drivers

How did Hyundai solve the rear door rattling problem in Santro?
Launched 2 door version

How did Hyundia increase the mileage of the santro ?
It had foot pedal to all passengers with chain drive .

How did Hyundai solve the roll-over problem in Strong winds ?
The vehicle can be anchored to any electric pole .

Bumper Stickers : Santro
Don't take life too seriously, Nobody makes it out alive anyway .
O instead of being a pedestrian i choose to drive !

How will a satroian explain the accident scene
A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.

How is Santro Owner benefitted ?
No friend asks for a free drive .

When do you feel safe while driving a Santro
A - When you take off your hands form the steering .

How do you upgrade a Santro
A- Remove the seats, change tyres , change the gear box , change the body shell.

ajmat · 26th March 2004, 16:27

these look like skoda jokes . BTW is the Santro auto really that bad ?

ported_head · 26th March 2004, 17:43

ohh..abrreviations... BMW- Bought My Wife.

by the way Pajero in Spanish is not a name very suitable for a car. i would post what it meant, but i have already been warned for using profanity on the forum. so unless i am told it's fine, i wont post what it means.

ajmat · 26th March 2004, 17:52

Ported_ head

Pajero means "playing with your best friend". Moderator - pls forgive - could not resist - Friday afternoon at work

ported_head · 26th March 2004, 18:12

i couldn't have put it any better myself ajmat.

v12 · 26th March 2004, 18:15

hey cool santro jokes. i'm sure dippy will like them

RJK · 26th March 2004, 19:21

We should forward these jokes to the gr8 Sachin Gupta !!!

toyota · 26th March 2004, 20:49

Sahin Gupta , dont tak about him .

Shan2nu · 26th March 2004, 20:51

Interesting Topic!!!

What do you call a person who hates these jokes?
Santro owner!!!

Regards...
Shan2nu

toyota · 26th March 2004, 21:31

one more joke from Hyundai

Dippy · 27th March 2004, 00:39

I love those jokes.. Anymore jokes on other Hyundais???

Cheers

Rehaan · 27th March 2004, 01:00

What is the sport-version of Santro ?
A- The driver wears Nike shoes.

lol lol lol !!

Aditya · 27th March 2004, 01:09

What on God's earth is that thing in the picture? I don't think I wanna be seen anywhere close to it.
Great jokes pal!

Shan2nu · 27th March 2004, 03:50

Q.How do you insult a Santro?
A. By calling it a car.

Q.Define Inzamam and Santro with just one word!!!
A. ""SLUGGISH"".

Q. What time is it when you see a Santro parked in your garage?
A. Time to get a new car!!!

Q. What do U get if you cross a Merc with a Jag?
A. Hyundai Sonata.

Q. What do you call a Santro that's just perfect?
A. Factory defect.

Regards...
Shan2nu

26th March 2004, 15:36	#1
toyota BHPian Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: bangalore Posts: 148 Thanked: 3 Times	HYUNDAI-Hope You Understand Nothing's Driveable And Inexpensive... VW-Virtually Worthless. AUDI- Always Unsafe Designs Implemented. BMW-Big Money Works. * Brutal Money Waster. * Bimbette Motor Weapon. * Break My Window. BUICK-Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer. CHEVROLET- Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips. * Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time. * Cheap Heap, Every Valve Rattles, Oil Leaks Every Time. Condition Hopeless, Entire Vehicle Relies On Leftover Engine Technology. DODGE-Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere. Dem Old Dudes Go Everywhere. Dead or Dying Gas Eater. Dear Old Dad's Geriatric Express. FIAT- Failure in Italian Automotive Technology. Fix It All the Time. Fix it again, Tony! FORD - First On Recall Day. Fixed Or Repaired Daily. First On Rust and Deterioration. Fix Or Repair Daily. Found On Road, Dead. Fast Only Rolling Downhill. Features O.J. and Ron's DNA. Found On Russian Dump. GM- General Maintenance. Great Mistake. * GMC- Garage Man's Companion. * Got A Mechanic Coming?. HONDA - Had One Never Did Again. MAZDA- Most Always Zipping Dangerously Along. OLDSMOBILE-Old Ladies Driving Slowly Make Others Behind Infuriatingly Late Everywhere. Overpriced, Leisurely Driven Sedan Made Of Buick's Irregular Leftover Equipment. PINTO - Put in new transmission often. PONTIAC - Poor old Neanderthal thinks its a Cadillac. SAAB-Send Another Automobile Back. Swedish Automobiles Always Breakdown. Sorry Arsed Auto Builders. TOYOTA-Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto. VOLVO- Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object. Vehicles Of Low Velocity Owners.
	() Thanks

26th March 2004, 16:11	#2
toyota BHPian Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: bangalore Posts: 148 Thanked: 3 Times	This is not for Santro owners . A man which has a broken tranny in a new Automatic Santro comes back to the shop were he bought the car and he uses his guarantee on the vehicle. When the mechanic asks how this could happen he shows them. He went to a racetrack were he drove the car at 120 mph but he sais " i am using the D for driving but i am on a race track so lets use the R for racing! How will you atleast make it appear like Santro accelerate from 0-100 km in 15 Sec . A- Park a UNO parallel to Santro , select the reverse gear in UNO and press hard on the accelerator . As you go back in the Uno , you can see Santro ..... Whats the difference between Santro and Police station ? A - It is less embarrassing when you leave a police station . What does pages 20 - 25 contain in Santros Ownersmanual ? A- How Yoga helps in handling embarrassment . What is the sport-version of Santro ? A- The driver wears Nike shoes. How do you double the value of a Santro? A- Fill up the half filled fuel tank . How do you make a Santro look good? Park it between two old Sipani What to you call a santro with brakes? A- Customized. What is the Santro owner's most ardent wish? A: To buy a car. I can see you've got a new car - a Santro! Yes, I won the second prize in a lottery. What was the first prize then? A fruit-basket! Santro will be introducing three new vehicles next year.þþ They will have a moped called an "I Go". They will have a þþþþþþþþ 4-door called a "We Go". They will also have a new station wagon called the "Y'all Go". How did Santro provide safety at low cost ? A- Instead of an air bag, there is a whoopee cushion taped to your steering wheel. How did Santro Improve its brakes without ABS. Gave a pair of Nike shoes with extra rubber for drivers How did Hyundai solve the rear door rattling problem in Santro? Launched 2 door version How did Hyundia increase the mileage of the santro ? It had foot pedal to all passengers with chain drive . How did Hyundai solve the roll-over problem in Strong winds ? The vehicle can be anchored to any electric pole . Bumper Stickers : Santro Don't take life too seriously, Nobody makes it out alive anyway . O instead of being a pedestrian i choose to drive ! How will a satroian explain the accident scene A pedestrian hit me and went under my car. How is Santro Owner benefitted ? No friend asks for a free drive . When do you feel safe while driving a Santro A - When you take off your hands form the steering . How do you upgrade a Santro A- Remove the seats, change tyres , change the gear box , change the body shell.
	() Thanks

26th March 2004, 16:27	#3
ajmat Team-BHP Support Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Bangalore Posts: 14,861 Thanked: 27,962 Times View My Garage	these look like skoda jokes . BTW is the Santro auto really that bad ?
	() Thanks

26th March 2004, 17:43	#4
ported_head Senior - BHPian Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Mumbai, India Posts: 2,387 Thanked: 20 Times	ohh..abrreviations... BMW- Bought My Wife. by the way Pajero in Spanish is not a name very suitable for a car. i would post what it meant, but i have already been warned for using profanity on the forum. so unless i am told it's fine, i wont post what it means.
	() Thanks

26th March 2004, 17:52	#5
ajmat Team-BHP Support Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Bangalore Posts: 14,861 Thanked: 27,962 Times View My Garage	Ported_ head Pajero means "playing with your best friend". Moderator - pls forgive - could not resist - Friday afternoon at work
	() Thanks

26th March 2004, 18:12	#6
ported_head Senior - BHPian Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Mumbai, India Posts: 2,387 Thanked: 20 Times	i couldn't have put it any better myself ajmat.
	() Thanks

26th March 2004, 18:15	#7
v12 Distinguished - BHPian Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Mumbai Posts: 6,739 Thanked: 7,213 Times View My Garage	hey cool santro jokes. i'm sure dippy will like them
	() Thanks

26th March 2004, 19:21	#8
RJK Senior - BHPian Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Bombay Posts: 1,140 Thanked: 701 Times	We should forward these jokes to the gr8 Sachin Gupta !!!
	() Thanks

26th March 2004, 20:49	#9
toyota BHPian Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: bangalore Posts: 148 Thanked: 3 Times	Sahin Gupta , dont tak about him .
	() Thanks

26th March 2004, 20:51	#10
Shan2nu Senior - BHPian Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Hubli - Karnata Posts: 5,533 Thanked: 125 Times View My Garage	Interesting Topic!!! What do you call a person who hates these jokes? Santro owner!!! Regards... Shan2nu
	() Thanks

26th March 2004, 21:31	#11
toyota BHPian Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: bangalore Posts: 148 Thanked: 3 Times	one more joke from Hyundai
	() Thanks

27th March 2004, 00:39	#12
Dippy Senior - BHPian Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Mumbai, India Posts: 7,558 Thanked: 2,462 Times	I love those jokes.. Anymore jokes on other Hyundais??? Cheers
	() Thanks

27th March 2004, 01:00	#13
Rehaan Team-BHP Support Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Bombay Posts: 24,042 Thanked: 34,074 Times	What is the sport-version of Santro ? A- The driver wears Nike shoes. lol lol lol !!
	() Thanks

27th March 2004, 01:09	#14
Aditya Team-BHP Support Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Mumbai Posts: 17,830 Thanked: 77,043 Times View My Garage	What on God's earth is that thing in the picture? I don't think I wanna be seen anywhere close to it. Great jokes pal!
	() Thanks

27th March 2004, 03:50	#15
Shan2nu Senior - BHPian Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Hubli - Karnata Posts: 5,533 Thanked: 125 Times View My Garage	Q.How do you insult a Santro? A. By calling it a car. Q.Define Inzamam and Santro with just one word!!! A. ""SLUGGISH"". Q. What time is it when you see a Santro parked in your garage? A. Time to get a new car!!! Q. What do U get if you cross a Merc with a Jag? A. Hyundai Sonata. Q. What do you call a Santro that's just perfect? A. Factory defect. Regards... Shan2nu
	() Thanks