The Official Joke thread

sammyboy · 5th January 2009, 19:23

hee hee IR, its your turn to be condored now

http://www.team-bhp.com/forum/96875-post276.html

iraghava · 6th January 2009, 00:29

Quote:

Originally Posted by sammyboy

hee hee IR, its your turn to be condored now

http://www.team-bhp.com/forum/96875-post276.html

Damn!!! Should have done a search!! O Condor the great, please spare me your wrath!

abhijitaparadh · 6th January 2009, 03:19

The first thing Fred says as he sees the doctor is "Please don’t laugh".

Of course I won’t laugh," the doctor said. "I’m a professional. In over twenty years I’ve never laughed at a patient."

"Okay then," Fred said, and proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing the tiniest penis the doctor had ever seen. It couldn’t have been the size of a peanut.

Unable to control himself, the doctor started giggling, then fell laughing to the floor.

Ten minutes later he was able to struggle to his feet and regain his composure.

"I’m so sorry, "Said the doctor, "I really am...I don’t know what came over me. On my honor as a doctor and a gentleman, I promise it won’t happen again. Now what seems to be the problem?"

"It’s swollen," Fred replied.

NetfreakBombay · 6th January 2009, 15:15

YouTube - Dog Shoplifts [Caught on Camera]

This dog walks in a store, grabs a bone and runs away

ceejay123 · 6th January 2009, 15:40

Little Johnny was on his way back home from the store with a loaf of bread in one hand, and his other hand in his pants pocket.

Off in the distance, Father Joseph sees little Johnny and realizes this is the perfect opportunity to go preach the gospel of the Holy Bible to the young boy.

Father Joseph approaches little Johnny and says, "I see that you have the "Staff of Life" in one hand."

"Yep," replies little Johnny. "And I have a loaf of bread in the other!"

ajmat · 6th January 2009, 15:56

"Is this a new mosque"

"No, it is George Bush's Press Conference"

Technocrat · 8th January 2009, 20:09

Guess karo yeh kya hai

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Try Try....
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AnekTA me ekTA ..............

sammyboy · 8th January 2009, 20:18

lol techno, you have set a new standard for PJ's for 2009

binz · 8th January 2009, 23:13

Condoring time Siddartha

Quote:

Originally Posted by appuchan

A heart surgeon takes his car to a mechanic for repair. While on the work, the mechanic says .................. I have to operate while keeping the "complex system" running. See if you can do that!"

Quote:

Originally Posted by siddartha

mechanic was removing the cylinder head from the motor of a car when
he spotted the famous heart surgeon in his shop, who was standing off
to the side, waiting for the service manager to come to take a look at
his car.
.....................

He said: "Try to do it when the engine is running

muneemmk · 9th January 2009, 02:17

A Sardar furniture dealer decided that he wanted to expand the line of furniture in his store, so he decided to go to Paris to see what he could find. After arriving in Paris (this being his first trip ever to the French capital), he met with some manufacturers and finally selected a new range of furniture that he thought would sell well back home in India.
To celebrate the new acquisition, he decided to visit a pub and have a glass of wine.
As he sat down enjoying his wine, soon enough, a very beautiful attractive young lady came to his table, asked him something in French (which he did not understand), and motioned towards the chair.
He invited her to sit down. He tried to speak to her in Hindi, Punjabi & English, but she did not speak or know any of these languages. So, after a couple of minutes of trying to communicate with her, he took a napkin and drew a picture of a wine glass and showed it to her. She nodded, and he ordered a glass of wine for her.
After sitting together at the table for a while, he took another napkin, and drew a picture of a plate with food on it, and she nodded.
They left the pub and found a quiet cafe that featured a small group playing romantic music. They ordered dinner, after which he took another napkin and drew a picture of a couple dancing. She nodded, and they got up to dance. They danced until the cafe closed and the band was packing up.
Then, after they were back at their table, the young lady took a napkin and drew a picture of a bed.

Would you believe...
Till this day, the Sardar has no idea how she figured out that he was in the furniture business!!!!!

condor · 9th January 2009, 11:11

Airport Security : What's your Name ?
Passenger : Batman
Airport Security : Your real name please?
Passenger : My name is Bat-Man
Airport Security : Are you trying to be funny? What is your family name?
Passenger : Superman

Airport Security handcuffs him & puts him into a locked security room

Then they checked his Passport
.
.
.
.

Batman Bin Suparman Fan Club | Facebook
(source : mail fwd)

Technocrat · 9th January 2009, 11:57

A man having no wife, no child, no money, no home, a blind mother, prays to
God.

God happy with his prayers, grants him only ONE wish!

Man: I want my mother to see my wife putting Diamond bangles on my Child's
hands in our new home!

God: Damn!!! I still have a lot to learn from these humans.

Moral of the story:- Compile all requirements and present in one line rather
than boring the appraiser for a long time.

rjvora_2000 · 9th January 2009, 12:06

Quote:

Originally Posted by condor

Airport Security : What's your Name ?
Passenger : Batman
Airport Security : Your real name please?
Passenger : My name is Bat-Man
Airport Security : Are you trying to be funny? What is your family name?
Passenger : Superman

Airport Security handcuffs him & puts him into a locked security room

Then they checked his Passport
.
.
.
.
Attachment 87378

Batman Bin Suparman Fan Club | Facebook
(source : mail fwd)

For fun people can do this thing also is something un-imaginable.

iraghava · 9th January 2009, 13:58

ROFL! Condor that was fantastic!

muneemmk · 12th January 2009, 02:03

Question. What do women and tax forms have in common?
Answer. Men love to cheat on them.

6th January 2009, 03:19	#3393
abhijitaparadh BHPian Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: SF Bay Area Posts: 222 Thanked: 3 Times	The first thing Fred says as he sees the doctor is "Please don’t laugh". Of course I won’t laugh," the doctor said. "I’m a professional. In over twenty years I’ve never laughed at a patient." "Okay then," Fred said, and proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing the tiniest penis the doctor had ever seen. It couldn’t have been the size of a peanut. Unable to control himself, the doctor started giggling, then fell laughing to the floor. Ten minutes later he was able to struggle to his feet and regain his composure. "I’m so sorry, "Said the doctor, "I really am...I don’t know what came over me. On my honor as a doctor and a gentleman, I promise it won’t happen again. Now what seems to be the problem?" "It’s swollen," Fred replied. Last edited by abhijitaparadh : 6th January 2009 at 03:24.

8th January 2009, 20:09	#3397
Technocrat Senior - BHPian Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: GTA Posts: 14,813 Thanked: 2,700 Times	Killer PJ :D Guess karo yeh kya hai .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... Try Try.... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... .... AnekTA me ekTA .............. Last edited by Technocrat : 8th January 2009 at 20:11.

9th January 2009, 11:11	#3401
condor Distinguished - BHPian Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Speed-brkr City Posts: 15,864 Thanked: 16,013 Times View My Garage	What happened @ the Airport Airport Security : What's your Name ? Passenger : Batman Airport Security : Your real name please? Passenger : My name is Bat-Man Airport Security : Are you trying to be funny? What is your family name? Passenger : Superman Airport Security handcuffs him & puts him into a locked security room Then they checked his Passport . . . . Batman Bin Suparman Fan Club \| Facebook (source : mail fwd) Last edited by condor : 9th January 2009 at 11:12.

5th January 2009, 19:23	#3391
sammyboy Senior - BHPian Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Ggn/Dehradun Posts: 1,842 Thanked: 521 Times View My Garage	hee hee IR, its your turn to be condored now http://www.team-bhp.com/forum/96875-post276.html

6th January 2009, 15:40	#3395
ceejay123 BHPian Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Mumbai Posts: 26 Thanked: Once	Little Johnny was on his way back home from the store with a loaf of bread in one hand, and his other hand in his pants pocket. Off in the distance, Father Joseph sees little Johnny and realizes this is the perfect opportunity to go preach the gospel of the Holy Bible to the young boy. Father Joseph approaches little Johnny and says, "I see that you have the "Staff of Life" in one hand." "Yep," replies little Johnny. "And I have a loaf of bread in the other!"

6th January 2009, 15:56	#3396
ajmat Team-BHP Support Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Bangalore Posts: 14,860 Thanked: 27,945 Times View My Garage	"Is this a new mosque" "No, it is George Bush's Press Conference"

8th January 2009, 20:18	#3398
sammyboy Senior - BHPian Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Ggn/Dehradun Posts: 1,842 Thanked: 521 Times View My Garage	lol techno, you have set a new standard for PJ's for 2009

9th January 2009, 02:17	#3400
muneemmk BHPian Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Cochin Posts: 832 Thanked: 99 Times View My Garage	A Sardar furniture dealer decided that he wanted to expand the line of furniture in his store, so he decided to go to Paris to see what he could find. After arriving in Paris (this being his first trip ever to the French capital), he met with some manufacturers and finally selected a new range of furniture that he thought would sell well back home in India. To celebrate the new acquisition, he decided to visit a pub and have a glass of wine. As he sat down enjoying his wine, soon enough, a very beautiful attractive young lady came to his table, asked him something in French (which he did not understand), and motioned towards the chair. He invited her to sit down. He tried to speak to her in Hindi, Punjabi & English, but she did not speak or know any of these languages. So, after a couple of minutes of trying to communicate with her, he took a napkin and drew a picture of a wine glass and showed it to her. She nodded, and he ordered a glass of wine for her. After sitting together at the table for a while, he took another napkin, and drew a picture of a plate with food on it, and she nodded. They left the pub and found a quiet cafe that featured a small group playing romantic music. They ordered dinner, after which he took another napkin and drew a picture of a couple dancing. She nodded, and they got up to dance. They danced until the cafe closed and the band was packing up. Then, after they were back at their table, the young lady took a napkin and drew a picture of a bed. Would you believe... Till this day, the Sardar has no idea how she figured out that he was in the furniture business!!!!!

9th January 2009, 11:57	#3402
Technocrat Senior - BHPian Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: GTA Posts: 14,813 Thanked: 2,700 Times	A man having no wife, no child, no money, no home, a blind mother, prays to God. God happy with his prayers, grants him only ONE wish! Man: I want my mother to see my wife putting Diamond bangles on my Child's hands in our new home! God: Damn!!! I still have a lot to learn from these humans. Moral of the story:- Compile all requirements and present in one line rather than boring the appraiser for a long time.

9th January 2009, 13:58	#3404
iraghava Senior - BHPian Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Bhaiyyaland Posts: 8,033 Thanked: 265 Times View My Garage	ROFL! Condor that was fantastic!

12th January 2009, 02:03	#3405
muneemmk BHPian Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Cochin Posts: 832 Thanked: 99 Times View My Garage	Question. What do women and tax forms have in common? Answer. Men love to cheat on them.