Not sure if it was me or hyderabadi food is going down or my database is old.
First Story:
I had my Sunday lunch at Bawarchi and believe me the taste was pathetic! I was a regular customer of the same since my 10th but I somehow decided not to go back.
Second Story: Chapter Invitation:
I was in my shorts still yawning and trying to open my eyes. It was Sunday and I had a heavy unsatisfactory lunch so wanted to lay down and wait for my digestive system to complete its work.
My cell phone beeped and I saw my friend's message on it. "Any plans for dinner with Families".
The last word "Families" has become a part of life for the past 2 years. Without which, there would be a "YES" from every one who received the message. This was a filter.
Chapter "YES I should have said a NO"
Who knew that this very word "Yes" would change your life for ever. The "Yes" when a friend asks "Wanna smoke" or "Isn't she hot", didn't matter much. It was like, "yup", "sure", "why not", "she sure is (this one is with a lot of interest tough".
This very same "yes" during the "I LOVE YOU, DO YOU LOVE ME?" or "DID YOU LIKE THE GIRL" or " YOU LIKE HER AND WE KNOW IT", changed the course of life. This "YES" has now become part of life. "Am I looking good?", "YES". "Shall we go to the movies?", "YES". "You are not going with your friends right?", "YES (This means, I'm not)". "Are you and IDIOT", "Obviously YES".
Chapter Permission:
I asked my wife if she is interested and then replied back the word "YES". See, sometimes the word sounds like Suprabhatam by Smt MS Subalakshmi.
The Permission chapter can sometimes be long. "Please, lets go". "No, I still didn't say yes to them.". "Obviously I'm asking you before I reply to them. Check my mobile if you wish (and just hope that she doesn't)".
This was short though.
Chapter Getting Dressed up:
"Choose a dress which you like me to wear". And after following the request which sounded more like an order, pat comes the answer "I already wore it 13450 years back, choose a different one". Why don't they tag it "Will wear it between these dates only".
After choosing one pair from 1K, I wanted to take a nap! My hands hurt from getting the suitcases down from the attic and then putting them back. Wait, again getting them down and back! Yes, there are three different categories in clothes. Parties, Office, Casual, Home, Already worn once, Already worn twice, Yes everyone already saw this dress, no I like it but not so much, I do not have matching earrings, I do not have matching sandals and oh, did I say 3 categories? Sorry, it should be one category and that is "MOOD!!!!".
I wore the jeans which I already wore a 1K times and a casual t-shirt. Why did I choose this t-shirt? because, it was right on the top of the other t-shirts!!!!
Chapter Angeeti:
We were 4 families and dropped in at 8:00 PM at the resto. At 8:15, I started sweating and complained that the AC was not functioning. The staff explained to me that there was a power cut and the generator was turned on. So until the power is back, our best friend was the napkin.
We ordered Reshmi Kebab, Lamb Liver, Paneer stuff (I'm not a fan of Veg so I don't know much about the dishes).
All of us tasted the dishes and put them aside. They were not anywhere near tasty. We ordered Kheema, and some more Veg dishes. Again, pathetic.
While there was a debate going on whether Intel i5 was stable, I realized that my shirt was totally wet. For a second I thought I was in a Dhabha at Shamirpet! Then I got back into my senses and called the staff once again. I told them that I was sweating and they better turn on the AC or we are leaving.
Surprisingly, the answer I got was "Sir, even I'm sweating!". Dude!!! I'm paying for sitting here and eating. I felt like

.
I was

so went out to smoke. On my way out, I felt that the other parts of the resto had functioning AC! . I finished smoking and went back to the staff. By the ways, one pack of Gold Flakes (10 cig pack) costs Rs 90 over there.
Once again, surprisingly, they said that they knew it!!. What the hell was happening? I reiterated the famous saying "Patience is virtue" and then counted to 1000000 (10 or 100 wouldn't suffice).
Completed the dinner at 11:30 PM. And asked for the bill.
Rs 7497. OK, so let's see what we had:
1) Lamb Liver
2) Reshmi Kebab
3) Veg Starters
4) Roti
5) Lamb Curry (not sure which one. I was already in a mood to leave so didn't care)
6) Veg Curry
7) Lamb Biryani
8) 2 Butter Milk
Probably I missed some stuff.
My friend asked for a 10% discount and the guy said, "We do not have the concept of discounts". That was rude.
We called the manager who instructed the staff to give us the requested discount and apologized for the NON FUNCTIONAL AC.
One guy brought the new revised bill and the total was exactly
Rs 7297. . I didn't understand if we tipped them or they did to us. But the best part is, he said, "Sir, here is the bill with 10% discount". I mean, either I'm an illiterate or I'm blind!
Solve this guys, LHS should be equal to RHS
200 = (7497 * 10) / 100.
The great mathematician "Sri Ramanujan" couldn't have solved the above equation.
By then I was done counting 100000 so I took the bill and threw it at the manager and said I want to pay the old bill and he can shove this new one where ever it fits.
The manger who was still in the process of counting 100000, unlike me, went back and brought a better offer. This time, the equation changed. And again, it was 10% of the original bill:
400 = (7497 * 10) / 100.
Finally at 11:45:44 PM, I gave up. I begged my friends to agree and just leave. Two reason, one, I had to get an Ice cream at Cream Stone and two, I start to my office at 7:45 AM!!!!
Moral of the story. You need to sweat for 3 and half hours and pay Rs 7097 to earn Rs 400. I HATE ANGEETI