[vellat sasi]

I have tried this with my two daughters. What I found useful is to get a local driver who will sit in the car while your mum drives. Since the person is a driver and not a relative, making mistakes is allowed.

One month is all that is required. My second daughter had a steady stream of commentary that she would run over one person or another all through her learning with me that disappeared when the driver took over. Now she zips.

This is cheap and does not create any problems.

[TurboKat]

Originally Posted by deep_bang

Get your mom to a place where there is no traffic. Let her practice a lot there, where there is no problem if the vehicle stalls. Practice a lot there and then slowly up the ante - wide roads and early mornings first, slowly moving to more challanging roads.

Having said all this, I also suggest you keep a timeline (say 6 months) and things don't work out, think about getting an auto car. I understand this is bad on finances, but still better than no car at all.

@saitvsk23 I would like to suggest the same. My mom is also in her early fifties and learned to drive a car last year. She was facing issues in pedal management too and started reprimanding dad for choosing a car with a manual transmission (Grand i10 in our case). So I made her drive non stop for an hour everyday in an empty field(at our native place) during the Bihu holidays. Once she gained confidence, I suggested her to start driving on empty roads early in the morning. Now, she doesn't mention about driving a car with an automatic transmission.

[TurboKat]

Originally Posted by saitvsk23

Duly noted. Thanks.

Also, my dad ended up frying the clutch plates at around 3000kms. Apparently it was a manufacturing fault and we just had to pay a little bit from our side. The car is used for a very less amount of time, it'll turn 6 years old, this coming december and the odometer stands at around 10500km.

Even my dad fried up the clutch plates at 4000 kms. In our case, it was not a manufacturing defect. Now the car has 63000 kms on the odo(from October 2016 till now) and is running on the third clutch set(second one was fried up by both mom and me).

[the.dogfather]

Pedal management is a common problem with drivers who learn at an older age, especially when they are accustomed to automatic scooters. For my mom, when she was learning, one of the main issues with the clutch pedal was that it was quite a strain for her to push it all they way down in my seat adjustment.

I would recommend to try to learn in an open ground and start with pushing the seat base as close as possible to the steering, so that the pedals can be reached properly. Try to ask your mom to try and reach the carpet behind the pedals and that much access should be there. The backrest can be adjusted to a more comfortable position, but the seat reach should be proper to make sure there is decent reach. Practice the first gear the most, as the clutch is most sensitive in first and do not do that on an open road as honking road users may cause panic.
You need to have a lot of patience, even if the car stalled a hundred times. Just say its okay, lets try it again and resume. It may take a practice of few days in the ground to get the pedals right, then you can move to the less crowded streets.

However, if she is finding it too difficult, be open to the idea to replace the car with an automatic, and I am sure she will pick it up soon. My wife, who was used to driving automatic scooters did manage to learn manuals, good enough to get her driving license. However, its only after we got an automatic car, that she actually felt confident to drive on her own.

[cpabhijit]

Like many others have said, maybe you should get an AT for your mom. The clutch along with the traffic is a bit too much for someone at that age. Even if you do get the AT, do weigh the risks. My own experiences are here:

Both my parents went to driving school in their 50s and got a license. Then, they bought a new Zen Estilo. I gave them a revision in their new car. They lived on a campus with nice roads and zero traffic so they quickly trumped all the basics and in a couple of months, they were able to go around the campus on their own, park, et al.

The campus was on the outskirts and off a busy road. My mom was the quicker and more confident of the two so once I felt she knew enough, I took her out. In traffic, she was a completely different person...wide eyed, panic stricken, no coordination, unable to find the gear lever. This was my first experience teaching someone and I was amazed at this change. Anyway, I tried for a few weeks but it was always the same. So gave up, told her to enjoy her drives inside the campus and that's it. Even if I persisted, the end result wasn't worth the risk. I didn't even try this with my dad.

A few years down, my wife decided she wants to learn driving, enrolled in a driving school, cleared the test and got a DL. For a couple of months, she took my Swift out in the mornings, but never alone. Was always anxious in traffic. So me being the best husband on earth , I sold the Swift and got the GT, thinking it'd be very easy for her. But it had the opposite effect on her! She didn't want to touch it because it was all new and she was mortified at the thought of scraping the car somewhere. She did attempt driving it a few years down, but the confidence was gone. Now, once again, we have some time so I thought I'll get her behind the wheel but it is a decade since the DL and the question I'm struggling to find an answer to is, whether it is worth the risk?

[adisan]

Learning to drive could be approached in two stages:

Stage 1: The basics of handling the steering and pedals. Typically this is done at a driving school. Better to repeat the course until one is steady wrt the above. To exit this stage, there should not be any thinking needed to work the pedals or steering when the instructor issues a command (like to turn or to stop).

Stage 2: Learning to apply the basics in real traffic conditions, to gauge the width of the car. Learn to read the traffic, to anticipate. Learn when to change gears for optimal results. Learn how to handle turns, U-turns, intersections, overtaking, allowing others to overtake. Learn how to use RVMs.

[anivy]

Originally Posted by vellat sasi

What I found useful is to get a local driver who will sit in the car while your mum drives. Since the person is a driver and not a relative, making mistakes is allowed.

Relatives in Hyderabad recently bought a Nissan Magnite CVT without knowing how to drive. They got the dealership folks to drive the car home. They hire a driver from DriveU whenever their schedule permits and are slowly building their skills.

As Sasi points out from his personal experience, having a non-family member teach might do the trick for your Mom too.

[Chhanda Das]

I am a 60 plus years old female who learned to drive nearly half a century ago from my Grandfather in his Landmaster car on the treacherous terrain of North-East India. I got my own first car in 1986, a HM Ambassador petrol Mark 4 which I let go in the new millennium. I now own a 2017 petrol Creta AT which is driven solely by my son. Although it is an automatic, I made sure that he learned to drive in a car with a manual transmission (first generation old Santro). Sadly, I cannot drive anymore due to eyesight issues

Anyway, before I digress too much, let me congratulate your mother for even agreeing to learn to drive at this age. A word of advice for you, when dealing with stubborn elders, patience and encouragement is the key. During the initial periods, please ignore the clutch wear and tear along with the exorbitant fuel consumption. And make sure that both of you have the proper documentation (and the "L" sticker) to avoid legal hassles.

Take her to an empty field or road. Ask her to drive in 1st gear only and that too at low speeds. This way she can learn as if the car were an automatic one. And all of her focus would be on the steering control. You can set tree branches and small stones on the ground that she would either have to pass through or evade. This would also be a good time to teach her to use the mirrors (IRVM and ORVMs) effectively. Do this for an hour or two every day. Please teach her that gear changes should be her secondary focus and the steering control should always be her primary focus. She will have a tendency to look at the gear lever (while changing from N to 1 and vice-versa) while taking her eyes off the road. Please discourage that and ask her to feel the gear lever's position by the angle and/or the slots. However, please do not keep nagging about it or else she may withdraw herself from the whole process mentally. Also, note that she will be under quite a bit of stress initially. So please give her a day off once in a while

As she gains confidence within a few days, increase the maximum upper limit of the gears (one at a time) and the maximum allowed speed. Once she reaches the 3rd gear capability, take her on long drives on the highway. Nothing boosts driving confidence like a long highway trip. Slowly, introduce her to driving in more congested areas with increasing levels of congestion. She should be able to drive within 2-3 months. Later you can teach her more complicated aspects like reversing and parallel parking. And finally, you can teach her to drive in such a way as to ensure minimum clutch wear while ensuring maximum fuel efficiency. This is exactly how my Grandfather taught me and exactly how I taught my son.

Please extend my best wishes to your mother and let her know that I am rooting for her

Here is a funny and relatable video to lighten the mood :-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eeGzDo_EPxc

On a side-note, where are all the suggestions from the Team Bhp ladies ?

[saitvsk23]

Originally Posted by Chhanda Das

I am a 60 plus years old female who learned to drive nearly half a century ago from my Grandfather in his Landmaster car on the treacherous terrain of North-East India. I got my own first car in 1986, a HM Ambassador petrol Mark 4 which I let go in the new millennium. I now own a 2017 petrol Creta AT which is driven solely by my son. Although it is an automatic, I made sure that he learned to drive in a car with a manual transmission (first generation old Santro). Sadly, I cannot drive anymore due to eyesight issues



On a side-note, where are all the suggestions from the Team Bhp ladies ?

Ma'am, thank you so much for your insight. It is realy helpful to see from the eyes of a lady driver. I was honestlly waiting for atleast one reply from a female driver so that it'll help me better to understand her.

[revvharder]

My mother has tried thrice, once around 10 years back second time with me but the car ended just 2 feet from an open 6 foot drain and that too on an empty 20 foot wide road thankfully i pulled the handbrake and on the third time it was a driving instructor who taught her for 15 days and 1 hour daily.

But when i took her for a drive on an empty road she wasn't able to coordinate.

During the pandemic i was thinking of trying once again but she made up some reasons and i did not push any further, this time again i have thought of teaching her but taking a different approach, this time i am thinking first to let her establish a co ordination in a switched off car maybe it will be boring but i think it will yield the best result.

In the parking during some cool time i'll just ask her to sit in the car and adjust the mirrors then use the clutch to change gears, use brake and accelerator then once she has established the coordination i will take her to an empty ground for further learning.

If everything fails we will buy an Automatic as a next car whenever financially viable.

Hopefully will update in a few months with a positive update.

[Ravi Parwan]

Teaching a youngster is easy, but takes time and LOADs of PATIENCE with age.

I have taught many drivers in my extended family. I remember the difference in the learning experience with my sister and my mom. While my sister took to driving like a duck to water and was driving on her own very quickly, my mom, who was a long time 2 wheeler driver was never really comfortable driving 4 wheels. When we changed cars, she did not want to risk denting the new car and stopped practicing her driving and became out of touch very quickly.

Long story short, I would second the suggestion made by other members, regarding the open ground technique, which is the best, tried and tested. Get her used to the mechanics of getting the car going as well as stopping, the steering inputs she needs at different speeds and then gradually introduce her to the streets where she can start experiencing traffic.

Whenever you take her out for the practice, always remember to be patient and keep your cool. A harried, irate instructor is actually worse for the learner since she will already be hassled by the unfamiliarity of the task (driving) she is doing.

[TrailBlazer007]

For me, after multiple attempts with a driving school, relatives and myself included, the final thing that helped me was letting her drive alone.

Started with big open grounds, then switched to empty roads.

Finally accompanied her to a short drive to the mall. From there on it was smooth sailing.

Cement the muscle memory. Maybe start with the core ideas like reversing, take off, parallel parking.

[subie_socal]

Originally Posted by noopster

It rarely does. The driving instructors teach only enough for a student to clear the driving test and get their DL. Their real learning actually starts after that.

I second this.


People who have the interest to learn and have the mindset that they want to drive a car on their own, can only drive in my opinion. An example is my sister; she enrolled in driving classes at the age of 19. She however had a firm stand the she will learn driving and that too in a manual car. Must say, 9 years later she drives impeccably and enjoys the process (Maybe she's a part petrolhead?). My mom, on the other hand, could not continue.

One thing to note is that the road traffic is chaotic these days and very much unruly. This might be a deterrent to newbies. To top it, our road traffic does not give much peace of mind to 'L' board vehicles. So, if your mom is ready to not give two hoots about it, half the job done. The other half is to learn the actual process. As mentioned in one of the earlier posts, it is better to get in touch with a known driver., who engages in teaching people to drive They mostly have the patience to deal with mistakes. I highly suggest that your mom shouldn't be sitting with a perfectionist. Things can go south pretty quickly (from personal experiences).

I hope that she learns to drive

[Jessierider]

If she is passionate about her driving then she should be given a chance. My aunt who is in her Mid 70s recently got herself a driving license from Kerala just on the back of her sheer passion for driving and her will power. She confidently drives her alto through the narrow two lane roads of kerala.

Your car is already 7 years old. It won't be a bad idea to replace it with an electric option. The reason being, manual cars will start becoming a rare phenomenon a few years from now. There is no point in her taking the pain of learning something that is on the verge of obsolescence atleast from the mainstream market.

[saitvsk23]

Originally Posted by Jessierider

If she is passionate about her driving then she should be given a chance. My aunt who is in her Mid 70s recently got herself a driving license from Kerala just on the back of her sheer passion for driving and her will power. She confidently drives her alto through the narrow two lane roads of kerala.

Your car is already 7 years old. It won't be a bad idea to replace it with an electric option. The reason being, manual cars will start becoming a rare phenomenon a few years from now. There is no point in her taking the pain of learning something that is on the verge of obsolescence atleast from the mainstream market.

It barely has 10k km on it. Would be a real shame if we sold it after paying all those EMI's. And its our first car too, so its a bit special for us. A new second car does not make sense at all for us, as of our situation right now.

Thank you for your words.