[Malyaj]

Last year I lost my business to Covid. Without going into the sob story, here are my experiences in the last 12 months, some lessons learnt and how to keep your motivation up. No fluff and getting straight to the point.

1. Nothing saves like savings - I had enough to tide me over this period. My savings were not a result of astronomical salaries or miserly living but prudent and periodic investments, sans any major misadventures. It was also easier that we have been a DINK family for quite some time, though we became a SINK family during lockdown (pun intended), with my wife holding fort. Note that I am not advocating any preference for a family structure.
   
   
2. In my early 40s, I have also been battling mid life crisis, with my sense of self worth oscillating between 'I am so awesome and gifted' to 'I am so utterly useless and unemployable'. It is important to get out of this zone and stay focussed. I decided to reskill and learnt programming. I wanted to create a web application (specifically SaaS, or Software as a Service, those familiar with the industry will know) and have been partially successful. In spite of being tech illiterate before this, I have been able to build a fairly sophisticated prototype.
   
   
3. If you are in my kind of situation, weigh your options but be very very clear and focused. Reskilling was never easier and cheaper. The quality and quantity of training available online is enormous and you have absolutely no reason to waste time. During the study phase I used to get up at 5 in the morning and study till 10 in the night with breaks in between.
   
   
4. We are conditioned into believing that we are wasting our time if we are not bringing home the bacon every month, either in the form of a salary or as business earnings. Get out of this mindset. Having your cash inflows matched to your monthly cycle is a very late 19th century onwards phenomenon. It is perfectly ok if you have no income for a period and make it up in other months. Think like a farmer who earns everything once or twice a year when they sell their produce.
   
   
5. While working on my application, I treated it like a regular job except that I am not getting paid now, and hopefully will make up once the product is commercially ready. I treat it as deferred earnings and find no reason to be despondent. I chose this path and decided to stick to it. I start work every day at 8 am and wind up around 9 pm. In between my wife and I take small breaks to cook meals. We watch movies every day, have fun and don't talk about negative things.
   
   
6. It is not all hunky dory. You have to learn to live frugally, even if just to make a statement to yourself. In the last year the only gadget we bought was a wifi UPS. It is quite amazing how much we don't need in life. Our biggest expense has been the annual maintenance of our two cars, which frankly felt like a waste both times considering how little they have been used.
   
   
7. Reskilling does not guarantee employability. Be under no illusion. Selling your new skills is still very hard. Many recruiters or people to whom you will reach out to explain your product / skills will write you off as a confused bloke who is not sure of what he wants in life. This can be morale crushing and you need to continue telling yourself that there is no turning the clock back.
   
   
8. Consider freelancing if your skills allow, even if temporarily. Take it as serious work and do a professional job. It is easy to get intimidated by the competition in the gig economy but a huge percentage of the people competing just aren't serious or competent. Again, it is not easy at all, but if this is what you want, don't dilly dally and start making a portfolio.
   
   
9. Communicate freely and frankly with your spouse. In most cases he/she is your best friend. Confide about your fears, insecurities, frustrations, humiliations and you will always feel better. Don't be a cry baby. Show that you are doing your best and will emerge out of it stronger.
   
   
10. If you have a hobby, nurture it. Even if it is once a fortnight, do something that gives you joy. I got into dismantling old gadgets and even repaired my big broken LCD TV at zero cost, saving us at least 50K in a new one. I restored an old laptop which my 70 year old mother-in-law now happily uses for her online accupressure classes (Yes, even she is learning !). I am now attempting to restore my broken Playstation 3.

I am not trying to portray a very rosy picture of how things can be. Not everyone has enough savings, a working spouse or even the same level of motivation. But I have learnt repeatedly during this period that no one is going to pull you out of your misery. Only you have to do it and there is no other option. No one gives a damn about your misery. You need to keep digging a deep well at one place instead of digging many shallow ones.

[GTO]

Thread moved from the Assembly Line to Shifting Gears. Thanks for sharing!

All of us take a couple of body blows in life; what matters is how you pick yourself up again, with spirit & determination .

Also dropping a link to selfdrive's experience of getting fired.

[condor]

Hats off, @Malyaj ! It is not everyone who can show that strength and resilience. Patience is a virtue, but in situations like this, it will not just test a person, but can subject one to Examination.

You have shared Some very important points there. Just to pick a couple:

1. Reskilling may not be as expensive as earlier, but selling it will be difficult - esp as one moves on in age. Even if one re-skills, there are already people who have the same skills and are younger.

2. Freelancing: see if any good service organization needs those skills. If one finds the right organization, they will remember you with gratitude. And it can help many people downstream.

3. Hobbies: very very important.

4. Communication !!

5. I can say patience again, though your post has patience written all over it.


Two points I can add if some has free time: Volunteer somewhere, based on your passion. There are places where one can at least do something useful while remaining engaged.

And maintain one's health - physical, mental, emotional.


***

Wishing you the Best. Hope things turn around soon for you, and for everyone who is affected.


Thanks again for sharing it with everyone.

[vb-saan]

Originally Posted by Malyaj

I am not trying to portray a very rosy picture of how things can be. Not everyone has enough savings, a working spouse or even the same level of motivation. But I have learnt repeatedly during this period that no one is going to pull you out of your misery. Only you have to do it and there is no other option. No one gives a damn about your misery. You need to keep digging a deep well at one place instead of digging many shallow ones.

Thank you for sharing! Those catch-phrases like ‘seeing the bigger picture, ‘look on the brighter side’, ‘light at end of the tunnel’ may all sound a cliché during good times, but the real meaning shines through during tough times. And once we sail through the rough waters the world looks a much better and meaningful place. Stay safe!

[vigsom]

Originally Posted by Malyaj

1. savings were a result of prudent and periodic investments, sans any major misadventures
2. In my early 40s, self worth oscillating between 'I am so awesome and gifted' to 'I am so utterly useless and unemployable'
3. weigh your options but be very clear and focused
4. perfectly ok if you have no income for a period and make it up in other months
5. You have to learn to live frugally
6. Show that you are doing your best and will emerge out of it stronger

Very pertinent points, @Malyaj. No.1 and no.5 are my picks of the lot. A compulsory periodic investment eg. yearly contribution to a ULIP, that has yielded a healthy maturity amount at the end of the term, is a huge boon when one faces a situation like what you've described.

Financial commitments and hunger for power are the two traps; intoxicating for some , while others fall prey to this and let go of values, ethics and so on. One doesn't have to live beyond means to impress someone.

Be a good human being, stay healthy and fit, and don't forget one's roots - these are my guiding mantras !!

[tharian]

All valid points, especially since I'm going through the same, it was easy to relate. It is very easy to lose focus and motivation especially in the current conditions. What I learnt in the last few months is just what you said - it is upto one self and no one else.

All the best to you.

[srvm]

Dear Malyaj,
Hats off to your spirit and perseverance.
I remember you ran a restaurant business. I always wondered how your business weathered the Covid-19 lockdown storm. Heartbreaking to know that you had to shut it. But as they say What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger. It is clear from your post that you are a tough spirit and you will emerge out of these trying times much stronger.
All the best.
Do update this thread whenever possible. Your words can inspire many.

[Maverick5490]

Very valid points @Malyaj, much needed in today's times.

I would also like to add a point of financial liabilities. Keep EMI's and loans at minimal, we are also a DINK family and our priority was to get the loans closed which fortunately happened just before the Pandemic. This helped us a lot in savings and tide it through.

[am1m]

Originally Posted by Malyaj

No fluff and getting straight to the point.

Hats off to you sir. I remember reading your posts about your restaurant business experience and I really admired how you took care of your employees for as long as it was possible during this period.

Now my respect has grown, this is an extremely useful, practical and motivating post!

[V.Narayan]

Dear Malyaj,

Thank you for this honest to goodness thread and sharing your experiences with candour. I'm sure many readers will find this thought provoking and insightful. Appreciate your courage. My very best wishes to you as you navigate these strange waters.

All,

Good times don't last {message for all of us who are mortgaging their expected future income to buy excessive consumer goodies today}, bad times don't last either {but time always seems to drag} but hardy perseverant thoughtful people almost always last.

Every point made by Malyaj is a nugget worth framing.

The crash of 2020-2021 is actually a blessing in one way for many young people who never saw an environment where incomes, jobs, careers went down. For a whole generation we only saw it go up and mind you most of us, including me, benefitted from it. This covid created economic crises has taught several of us some useful experiences on the value of saving. Why save - because we don't know what lies in the womb of time for us.

My best wishes to Malyaj and all those who have faced economic struggles in this last one tumultuous year.

[Durango Dude]

I'll be frank, my income dropped 57% during Covid: vacillating lock downs limited hours at work. On top of that I paid the salary of those who depend on me without skimping or negotiating with them to take a salary cut.

I've again gone into lock down self imposed this time due to the risk it entails in my line of work: I need to ask people to lower their masks to examine at close quarters. Not socially distanced and asking to lower the mask is asking for trouble in trying times we live in. So took a call and stopped working for the last 20 days. Do online and phone consults only. But that's just meagre pocket money compared to working real time.

I suggest you take it easy and fall back on hobbies and take drives in the evening with your wife: keep your mental balance. All this will come to pass: nothing is permanent. Be prudent on spends and don't 'invest' keep liquidity at hand that's what will see you through. As long as humanly possible, I will pay salaries of those who depend on me. Sleep well eat healthy and exercise and keep mentally & physically fit and take those shots as and when you become eligible.

@Malyaj: Thanks for bringing this up...

[Jaguar]

Malyag, very brave of you to come forward and pen down the experience. If you are comfortable, could you please also talk about how you lost your business and why you chose to re-skill in a completely new domain?

Originally Posted by Malyaj

If you are in my kind of situation, weigh your options but be very very clear and focused. Reskilling was never easier and cheaper. The quality and quantity of training available online is enormous and you have absolutely no reason to waste time. During the study phase I used to get up at 5 in the morning and study till 10 in the night with breaks in between.

This is the only point where I have a difference in opinion. While it is important to reskill, spending 5 am to 10 pm on studies is bound to burn you out. IMO it is sufficient to spend a few hours or learning and the remaining should be on other activities.

[Malyaj]

Originally Posted by Jaguar

...If you are comfortable, could you please also talk about how you lost your business and why you chose to re-skill in a completely new domain?

@Jaguar - it was a small time cloud kitchen business, already a borderline case in terms of profitability. It would be better to say that Covid hastened the demise. Many businesses in the F&B industry continue to survive, either because they are well funded or well established. My fundamentals were shaky as we entered the Covid era so it was almost inevitable.

The choice of new domain was more a by product of what I wanted to do and how. There was lockdown so meeting people was difficult. I had no funds left to invest in a new business and my existing skills were something that can be described as 'good to have' when times are good. These were times when companies were barely holding on to 'essential' skill providers. I chose to develop an application in an area where I had prior functional expertise so it was not completely unrelated, though the use of technology itself was very new to me. App development was something I could do independently at literally zero cost.

Originally Posted by Jaguar

This is the only point where I have a difference in opinion. While it is important to reskill, spending 5 am to 10 pm on studies is bound to burn you out. IMO it is sufficient to spend a few hours or learning and the remaining should be on other activities.

This was only for a brief period when I was learning some programming languages. I realised that early morning was the best time to study. Also during the lockdown period when we had to do everything ourselves, the day was anyways punctuated with various chores which served as a break and the line between work and free time was disappearing for both me and my wife.

[subraiyr]

@Malyaj

This is one of the best posts that i have read till now. A lot many of us are stumbling ahead and many more are left to hold pieces and try to put it together. This is very pertinent during the times we live in.

One thing i would like to add which my firm taught me is to Network. You never know where the next door is and who can open it. Build your network when you are working and someone, somewhere is looking for You

Good luck and do have fun. We all live one life and one should not spend it in despair

[kannan666]

Thank you for sharing your personal experiences in an open and candid manner. I too had a similar jolt as my IT services business went kaput during these trying times but was able to survive thus far since I had not put all my eggs into one basket and I had other sources of income and vocations