Team-BHP - The Official Joke thread
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Quote:

Originally Posted by Scorcher (Post 2596306)
Time for the "Kanth" duo! :D

@Scorcher: Thats hilarious :uncontrol

one more -

Vijaykanth: Machi, coming for a movie?
Rajnikanth: which movie?
Vijaykanth: Kungumapoo bonda
Rajnikanth: Tamil movie?
Vijaykanth: No machi, its the new 3d animation movie in english
Rajnikanth: you fool, its 'Kungfu Panda'

My wifey sent this across... quite true :)

and my Mum thinks I watch 'Nigella Bites' for the food part :p

Quote:

Originally Posted by dhanushs (Post 2596802)
English teachers rule!!..

1. Open the windows, let the Air Force come in.
...
4. I talk,he talk, Why you middle talk?
...
8. Bring your parents with Your Mom 'n Dad
...
10. Go and stand in the corner of that circle.

And next day same teacher to the late comers [incidentally 3 of them]...

"Both of you 3 come here. Tell me why you are late; YES or NO ?!!" :D

Read this moments ago in fb : :D

Teacher - What is the square root of 69???

Student -I dont know

Teacher- you dont know anything, you stupid boy.
...
Student-I have a question for you maam that you can never answer.

Teacher-whats the question?

student-why this kolaveri kolaveri kolaveri di?

Teacher:- ........ XXXXXXXXXXX

When Aishwaryaji delivered a baby girl,
The doctor welcomed the baby saying:
"You will be amazed to know which family you are born in.
Do you know who your Grandfather is?"
The baby replied, "Yes, the greatest actor of Bollywood."
The Doctor was shocked.
"And your Grandmother?"
"She was one of Bollywood's greatest heart throb's during her hey days!"
Then he asked, "Do you know who your Mother is?"
The baby replied, "One of the most beautiful ladies in the world - ex-Miss World."
The doctor finally asked, "Do you know who your Father is?"
The baby replied, "NO IDEA"

In the same vein

Aiswariya's baby's name 'Asavi' decoded

A = By default

Rest of alphabets come from her mama's past love life

SA = Salman

VI = Vivek

Love is indeed immortal

A sociologist study has verified that a woman's ultimate fantasy is having two men at once. In this fantasy, one man cooks and the other cleans! :uncontrol lol:

A woman is in a grocery store and happens upon a grandpa and his poorly behaving 3-year-old grandson at every turn.

It's obvious gramps has his hands full with the kid screaming for candy in the candy aisle, cookies in the cookie aisle; same for fruit, cereal and soda.

Meanwhile gramps is working his way around saying in a controlled voice, 'Easy Albert, we won't be long; easy boy.'

Another outburst and she hears gramps calmly say, 'It's OK Albert, just a couple more minutes and we'll be outta here; hang in there.'

At the checkout, the little terror is throwing items from the cart and gramps again in a controlled voice is saying, 'Albert, Albert, relax buddy, don't get upset -- we'll be home in five minutes; stay cool, Albert.'

Very impressed the woman goes up to gramps as he's loading the kid and the groceries into the car and says, 'You know sir, it's none of my business, but you were amazing in there. I don't know how you did it. The whole time you kept your composure and no matter how loud and disruptive he got, you just calmly kept saying things would be OK. Albert is very lucky to have you for his grandpa.'

'Thanks, lady,' replied gramps, 'But I'm Albert . . . the little jerk's name is Johnny.'

kolaveri di funny remix video - YouTube

OMG!!!... ROTFLMAO!!.. rl:rl:

Some extremely funny, senseless stunts ending up not-so-good!!..

Funny Bike Auto Accident - YouTube

bike stunting funny.mp4 - YouTube

This, actually, isn't a joke (and it isn't supposed to be *that* funny). Its just a comic strip I made on a lazy weekend while pondering over stuff :p

P.S. Click on the image for a larger size.

The Official Joke thread-final-terminator-comic-upload.png

Once Bill Gates was in discussions with Rajnikanth.
Bill Gates told him that his house and property is so huge that a Bullet Train can arrive, go and even remain parked there.
Rajnikanth said OK nice Thiru Bill, my house has such a dimension where if you go from one end to the other, your cellphone will go into the roaming mode.

A Catholic Priest, an Indian Doctor, a rich Chinese Businessman and a Policeman were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers in front of them.
The Policeman fumed, 'What's with those guys? We have been waiting for fifteen minutes!'

The Indian Doctor chimed in, 'I've never seen such poor golf!'

The Chinese Businessman yelled out 'Get moving, time is money'

The Catholic Priest said, 'Here comes George the greens keeper, maybe he can do something about this'

'Hello, George!', said the Catholic Priest, 'What's wrong with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?'

George the greens keeper replied, 'Yes. That's a group of blind fire fighters. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime.'

The group fell silent for a moment.

The Catholic Priest said, 'That's so sad. I think I will say a special prayer for them tonight.'

The Indian Doctor said, 'Good idea. I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist colleague and see if there's anything he can do for them.'

The Chinese Businessman replied, 'I think I'll donate $50,000 to the fire-fighters in honor of these brave souls'

The Policeman said, 'Why the hell don't they play at night?'

Here's a Tintu-Mon joke:

Ambani: If I take out my car in the morning and start driving in the my tea estate, I won't be able to cover even half of it by the afternoon.

Tintu-Mon: My grandfather once had........a car of that sort :D


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