[swissknife]

This is one safe pillion!

[ecenandu]

Just took my niece for a shopping trip, she wanted her toy dino to be safe as well. So have to belt up the doll as well..

[Shumi_21]

Hello everyone,

A couple of funny one liners by cool old men encountered riding on Mumbai's roads by yours truly.

Incident 1:
This happened in October. I was riding to my cousin's place in goregaon on a Saturday morning from Juhu. While I was waiting for the signal to turn green at the Juhu circle signal, a well dressed old timer approached me for a ride till infinity mall as he was getting late and his cab was still missing.

I oblige and we start riding towards infinity mall which in any case was on my way towards my cousin's house. We almost reach his destination and are now waiting for a signal to turn green. Traffic is little heavy due to Metro construction work. I'm behind a BEST bus, there is enough space for my bike to go through, however there is a differently abled lady on her scooter with the balancing wheels in between me and the bus. She could probably go through, but I decided not to pressure her by honking.

By now a few motorcyclists have converged behind me and everyone is waiting patiently seeing the lady on her scooter. But one entitled specimen, promptly starts honking on his RE classic 350 and simultaneously blipping the throttle causing an unholy racket, inconveniencing everyone else. The old man meanwhile was enthusiastically telling me about long rides with his wife in the 70's.

As the RE rider continued to honk, the old man's patience ran out. He stood up on my bike's footpegs, placed one hand on my shoulder and used the other to point at his backside, gesturing to the honking RE guy said the following gem,

That's right brother, ride up my street

Everyone laughed and the specimen stopped honking


Incident 2:

This happened last Friday. I'm on my home from work and spot an old man riding an equally old Bajaj Chetak rather enthusiastically. When we stop at a signal I give the old man a thumbs up. He smiles at me. Approaching the next signal which was barely 300m ahead, I see that it is still red, hence let go of the throttle and coast towards the red light at 40kmph. The old man too thinks the same and is coasting on my right (I'm in the left most lane). On queue, a roadside Rossi again appears on a RE Classic 350 (a different one!) and cuts the old man dangerously almost causing him to lose balance, while gaining only one car length of ground. All of us come to a parallel halt at the stop signal, where the old man scolds the RE guy for being irresponsible. The RE guy responds that the old man is losing his riding skills and should take a rickshaw. The old man says just wait and watch.

As the signal turned green, the old man on the Chetak was back to his enthusiastic riding style and made the RE guy look like an idiot, taking him to school for the next couple of signals, even trash talking him at every red light. Finally, at a red light the old man says to the RE rider.

You can't crack a peanut shell with your teeth, yet to expect to crack a walnut shell

Sassy old timers I say!

[GTO]

Mod Note: Just cleaned up the thread. Please avoid Off-Topic posts on Team-BHP.

Thanks!

[paragsachania]

Originally Posted by Shumi_21

Incident 2:

This happened last Friday.

And incidentally this one was cracked by Kunal Kamra in one of his stand-up shows:

See 04:20 onward-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pjBDQOH4VpM

[Shumi_21]

Originally Posted by paragsachania

And incidentally this one was cracked by Kunal Kamra in one of his stand-up shows

Indeed man, it is the same exact line! Guess the old man is a fan of Kunal Kamra.

[gunin]

My bull (classic 500) vs an elephant:

This incident occurred around 4 years back. I was riding through the Doboka Forest Reserve in Karbi Anglong, Assam when I noticed an oncoming car signalling something to me. I didn't pay any attention and took a long sweeping curve only to find a single wild elephant coming straight towards me. The sight of the elephant made me stop in my tracks and the elephant also stopped confused at the bullet's rumbling. At this moment, the elephant was probably around 200 meters away from me. As we stood facing each other, I decided to switch off the bike thinking that the elephant would accept the truce and walk into the forest.

It proved to be a mistake as no sooner that I switched off the bike, the elephant started his charge with a loud trumpet. I tried to switch on the bike and flee but you know the damned bike just decided it was a good time not to start (i had used the engine-kill switch and in my terror forgot all about it). I am sure it was only seconds but I was at that stage when I thought of dropping the bike and make a run for it. Meanwhile with the elephant still charging, I somehow accidentally flipped the engine kill switch to ON and as I was already on the electric start, my bullet finally roared to life startling the elephant. With the elephant at an uncomfortable proximity to me, I duly turned my bike and didn't ride back for another hour or so

[V.Narayan]

Originally Posted by V.Narayan

I had a few unusual experiences including with a jailor and a convict but that one I'll keep for another day

As mentioned in my last post here is the one on jailor & under-trial. It is a sad anecdote.

Sometime in 1985 a junior colleague and I were driving down from Sidhi to Bilaspur at around 6PM. It was month of February so it got dark early. In Chattisgarh the roads were poor and lonely. And in 1985 India's per capita income was a lot lower than it is today. In Chattisgarh at least the culture of assisting another on the road was quite prevalent driven by lack of amenities, lighting, jungles etc. So we see up ahead a cop riding a bicycle with what seemed another man trotting along behind him. As it was getting dark and far away from civilization we pulled up and enquired. Here was a cop from some nearby town taking an under-trial for a court hearing the next day at Bilaspur. The cop was pedaling the cycle with the under trial tied to the carrier with a rope and trotting along behind him. Hamara India. Anyways we stopped out of courtesy and shock - oh these namby pamby big city dwellers getting shocked at stuff like this. We offer them a lift. Bilaspur was still 5 to 6 kms away. They readily accept. Hop into our jeep. Cycle goes onto the carrier. Constable insists the under trail should remain with his hands tied up. Nevertheless both happily partake of the snacks we were carrying. The look in that hapless under trial's eyes was one of despair beyond belief. An under-paid under-resourced police constable and a malnourished under-trial!

India has over 2.8 lakh undertrials locked up. Of these 25% according to the Govt have been there for over a year. Around 35,000 have been locked up for over two years. The worst case was of one Boka Thakur of Bihar who remained an under trial for 36 years without facing trial. Their plight remains a blot on our society.

[W.A.G.7]

This one happened yesterday night. We were waiting at a long signal, and there was this group of kids sitting on the divider. An extremely dusty Celerio came by and stopped. Immediately two of them jumped up and started drawing pictures and letters on the rear windscreen!



By the time the signal turned green, the boy had written English alphabets and the girl had drawn a beautiful picture of a peacock in the dust!! The driver was either not paying attention or did not mind them using his car as a drawing board.

Sometimes I keep wondering; how much talent some people have got, but they either fail to unlock their potential or they don't get enough opportunities in life?!

[TorqueyTechie]

Originally Posted by W.A.G.7

By the time the signal turned green, the boy had written English alphabets and the girl had drawn a beautiful picture of a peacock in the dust!! The driver was either not paying attention or did not mind them using his car as a drawing board.

Thats very nice of the car driver and I feel pity for the young boy. I just hope he is studying in some school and not dropped out. One of the reason I just buy flowers, pens and what nots from kids at traffic signals ( I don't hand money to them if they beg though) even though I am not sure how much of the money they make actually is made use of for their studies. But hey that's me, an eternal optimist!

[libranof1987]

Originally Posted by TorqueyTechie

One of the reason I just buy flowers, pens and what nots from kids at traffic signals ( I don't hand money to them if they beg though) even though I am not sure how much of the money they make actually is made use of for their studies. But hey that's me, an eternal optimist!

My friend has a very noble idea when it comes to such instances.

He always carries two packets of biscuits (Parle-G) in his car. Any time he comes across a beggar at a traffic junction asking for money, he simply asks them if they'd like the biscuits instead. Never pays money.

It's funny how some people warm up to it but most insist on money.

[mukeshgoel]

Originally Posted by libranof1987

He always carries two packets of biscuits (Parle-G) in his car.

I started doing that few years ago after reading and liking the idea on social media. Kept small biscuits packs in the car for this.

It felt good for few days but one day, on a red light in Delhi (Deepali Chowk), I gave 4-5 packs to kids, they shouted and called their friends and parents from all four sides of red light. I gave 7-8 more and the packs finished. Then they all got violent and started hitting the car with punches demanding more.

That was really scary and I stopped doing that.

[TorqueyTechie]

Originally Posted by libranof1987

He always carries two packets of biscuits (Parle-G) in his car.
It's funny how some people warm up to it but most insist on money.

This I did try for some time after reading a post on FB. But man they do always insist on money and they start to walk away if given a choice of biscuits/food. Guess Bangalore people are used to getting money only always.

Originally Posted by mukeshgoel

I gave 7-8 more and the packs finished. Then they all got violent and started hitting the car with punches demanding more.

That was really scary and I stopped doing that.

Man that indeed is scary! May be they all were very hungry or they wanted many for their friends as well but indeed a scary situation.

[audioholic]

Earlier this week, I was driving down the cable stayed bridge towards Tin Factory junction, and with the new manual traffic regulation in place, the drivers of the cabs ahead of me decided to have a quick meet during the stoppage. They had a nice chat for a minute, drank some water and finally the driver ran back to his cab. It shows how much the cabbies have got used to such stuff and are taking it quite optimistically

Can we have quick TBHP meets this way?

https://youtu.be/h_0lqlLecXQ

[blackwasp]

Originally Posted by swissknife

This is one safe pillion!

Spotted this guy's relative today on the way to work. Surprised to see him/her cross the road smartly.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zmhVxNkIwNA