A YetiGuide® : How To Post In Proper English

Thad E Ginathom · 16th October 2007, 03:31

A George Mikes reader!

I'm amazed and delighted to read that quote

Is it from How to be an Alien? A book that seems almost as true about the British Character today as when it was written decades ago!

A more commonly known saying is: Britain and America: two countries divided by a common language

anupmathur · 16th October 2007, 07:59

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thad E Ginathom

Is it from How to be an Alien? A book

Or perhaps from How to Scrape Skies.

Also read a bit of Richard Armour, in the same vein (of humour).

anupmathur · 16th October 2007, 14:04

Quote:

Originally Posted by anupmathur

in the same vein (of humour).

In which same vein I would request Sam (yes, the one of Kapasi fame) to please do a tutorial on the word 'jerking' and it's usage in the context of cars.
A growing number of 'jerking' cars and Safari Dicors are being seen on various threads! I'm sure there is a more dignified way to express that particular characteristic of cars.
And if it is minds that need cleaning up, I promise I'll seek treatment at my shrink's!

Sam,

.

Thad E Ginathom · 16th October 2007, 16:32

How to Scrape Skies. A new one to me. Thanks!

Jerking? well, it does seems that some people like to have a remarkably, errr... how to put it? Intimate relationship with cars or the idea of them! And we all know what they say about men with big cars!!

ajitkommini · 17th October 2007, 11:05

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thad E Ginathom

... And we all know what they say about men with big cars!!

they also have big garages?

Sam Kapasi · 17th October 2007, 11:31

Such a wonderful word, such varied meanings

I don't know where to begin.

Jerk: (Pronounced juhrk.)

The most common way to use this is with reference to a sudden quick movement. Often a repetitive movement.

This is perhaps why people say things like "Arrey, my car is jerking"

There are indeed other options you could use, like bucking, shaking, wobbling, dhadam-dhadaming, being an arse again and acting like a camel on heat.

But the common thing in India is to say that your car is jerking.

Other examples of using it like a verb are "He jerked his head up and stared"

Jerk is also a noun: The action of moving something quickly. "He drove off with a jerk", "She pulled him towards her with a jerk"

Of course there is another translation to this too.

Jerk: An annoying/stupid person, mostly stereotypically male.
So while the above 2 sentences could change their meaning
"He drove off with a jerk"
He got some annoying person into his car and then drove off.

"She pulled him towards her with a jerk" She bent a stupid man like a hook and used him to hook another guy, much like a fishing rod and pull him towards herself. Uhhhhhh.....

Anyways, if you're at a club and you grab a lady's derriere (this is a french word for bum), chances are she's either calling you a jerk, or a commonly used word for an anal aperture. It is advisable never to do this to a lady, especially if she is carrying a handbag, a cricet bat or worse, a strong man with her.

Jerk Off: Add a little word like off, and you have a whole new meaning to this wonderful word.

He was jerking off in style - he was masturbating with aplomb.
While this is the most obvious usage, it is also used to indicate a wasting of time.
Hey hurry up, we're just sitting around jerking off, waiting for you. This sentence does not indicate group masturbation, it means that they are all sitting around wasting time.

In some cases, an extremely annoying person is also called a jerk-off. This does not mean that you hold the person in your right palm and vigorously shake him back and forth.

Jerking around: To beat around the bush, not get to the point, purposely waste time and not finish the work at hand

"Hey stop jerking around and get back to work"
"Stop jerking me around, are you gonna give me the money or not?

To jerk meat - is to cure dried meat and cook ot over a fire. The product obtained by these means is often packaged and sold as a meat jerky.

gbpscars · 17th October 2007, 11:42

It would have been wonderfully jerk-y to have you as an English teacher at my school, 'cause my teacher there was a real jerk.

JOMCL - Jerking On My chair with Laughter.
(your 4th explanation does not apply here. am at office)

Thanks for that Sam!!!

anupmathur · 17th October 2007, 12:04

Thanks, Sam. Utterly delightful!
Particularly the way you have explained certain meanings with aplomb!

I have a doubt about this one though:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sam Kapasi

Jerk is also a noun: The action of moving something quickly. "He drove off with a jerk", "She pulled him towards her with a jerk"

Is this correct? Which word would be the noun in the above two examples?

Sam Kapasi · 17th October 2007, 12:12

Quote:

Originally Posted by anupmathur

Thanks, Sam. Utterly delightful!
Particularly the way you have explained certain meanings with aplomb!

I have a doubt about this one though:

Is this correct? Which word would be the noun in the above two examples?

You are right. In this case I've used it more as an intransitive verb and not so much as a noun.
With a jerk: In the case of with an annoying person, the jerk is the noun heh heh.

But as a classic noun it would be "A jerk of the head"

anupmathur · 17th October 2007, 12:14

Quote:

Originally Posted by ajitkommini

they also have big garages?

No silly! They obviously have bigger bank balances!

Sam Kapasi · 17th October 2007, 12:16

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thad E Ginathom

And we all know what they say about men with big cars!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by ajitkommini

they also have big garages?

Quote:

Originally Posted by anupmathur

No silly! They obviously have bigger bank balances!

And bigger jerks!!

anupmathur · 17th October 2007, 12:21

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sam Kapasi

But as a classic noun it would be "A jerk of the head"

Let it pass.
All this 'needless' Wren & Martining detracts from that brilliant piece!

anupmathur · 17th October 2007, 12:26

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sam Kapasi

And bigger jerks!!

Is that what Thad meant? I'm kinda lost.
Who be them bigger jerks? And what they got to do with big-car men?

Sam Kapasi · 17th October 2007, 12:36

They say men with big cars have small pee-pees. You know, bangers, wieners, lizards, little brothers. That it's some kind of phallic substitute for the lack of being well endowed.

I don't know. I've always suspected that the guys who said that had small cars.

anupmathur · 17th October 2007, 12:48

Gee Thanks, Sam. How silly of me not to have thunk it myself!
I think we better shift gears now - this page is becoming a mite pornographic!
___________________

Thad, do you approve??

16th October 2007, 03:31	#286
Thad E Ginathom Distinguished - BHPian Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Chennai Posts: 11,435 Thanked: 29,974 Times	A George Mikes reader! I'm amazed and delighted to read that quote Is it from How to be an Alien? A book that seems almost as true about the British Character today as when it was written decades ago! A more commonly known saying is: Britain and America: two countries divided by a common language
	() Thanks

16th October 2007, 16:32	#289
Thad E Ginathom Distinguished - BHPian Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Chennai Posts: 11,435 Thanked: 29,974 Times	How to Scrape Skies. A new one to me. Thanks! Jerking? well, it does seems that some people like to have a remarkably, errr... how to put it? Intimate relationship with cars or the idea of them! And we all know what they say about men with big cars!!
	() Thanks

17th October 2007, 11:31	#291
Sam Kapasi Distinguished - BHPian Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Mumbai (but wat Posts: 6,939 Thanked: 2,479 Times View My Garage	Jerk!!! Such a wonderful word, such varied meanings I don't know where to begin. Jerk: (Pronounced juhrk.) The most common way to use this is with reference to a sudden quick movement. Often a repetitive movement. This is perhaps why people say things like "Arrey, my car is jerking" There are indeed other options you could use, like bucking, shaking, wobbling, dhadam-dhadaming, being an arse again and acting like a camel on heat. But the common thing in India is to say that your car is jerking. Other examples of using it like a verb are "He jerked his head up and stared" Jerk is also a noun: The action of moving something quickly. "He drove off with a jerk", "She pulled him towards her with a jerk" Of course there is another translation to this too. Jerk: An annoying/stupid person, mostly stereotypically male. So while the above 2 sentences could change their meaning "He drove off with a jerk" He got some annoying person into his car and then drove off. "She pulled him towards her with a jerk" She bent a stupid man like a hook and used him to hook another guy, much like a fishing rod and pull him towards herself. Uhhhhhh..... Anyways, if you're at a club and you grab a lady's derriere (this is a french word for bum), chances are she's either calling you a jerk, or a commonly used word for an anal aperture. It is advisable never to do this to a lady, especially if she is carrying a handbag, a cricet bat or worse, a strong man with her. Jerk Off: Add a little word like off, and you have a whole new meaning to this wonderful word. He was jerking off in style - he was masturbating with aplomb. While this is the most obvious usage, it is also used to indicate a wasting of time. Hey hurry up, we're just sitting around jerking off, waiting for you. This sentence does not indicate group masturbation, it means that they are all sitting around wasting time. In some cases, an extremely annoying person is also called a jerk-off. This does not mean that you hold the person in your right palm and vigorously shake him back and forth. Jerking around: To beat around the bush, not get to the point, purposely waste time and not finish the work at hand "Hey stop jerking around and get back to work" "Stop jerking me around, are you gonna give me the money or not? To jerk meat - is to cure dried meat and cook ot over a fire. The product obtained by these means is often packaged and sold as a meat jerky. Last edited by Sam Kapasi : 17th October 2007 at 11:33.
	() Thanks

17th October 2007, 11:42	#292
gbpscars BHPian Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Navi Mumbai Posts: 401 Thanked: 5 Times	It would have been wonderfully jerk-y to have you as an English teacher at my school, 'cause my teacher there was a real jerk. JOMCL - Jerking On My chair with Laughter. (your 4th explanation does not apply here. am at office) Thanks for that Sam!!!
	() Thanks

17th October 2007, 12:36	#299
Sam Kapasi Distinguished - BHPian Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Mumbai (but wat Posts: 6,939 Thanked: 2,479 Times View My Garage	They say men with big cars have small pee-pees. You know, bangers, wieners, lizards, little brothers. That it's some kind of phallic substitute for the lack of being well endowed. I don't know. I've always suspected that the guys who said that had small cars. Last edited by Sam Kapasi : 17th October 2007 at 12:38.
	() Thanks

17th October 2007, 12:48	#300
anupmathur Senior - BHPian Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: New Delhi Posts: 3,095 Thanked: 311 Times	Gee Thanks, Sam. How silly of me not to have thunk it myself! I think we better shift gears now - this page is becoming a mite pornographic! ___________________ Thad, do you approve??
	() Thanks