[dZired]

Found this on facebook..

[mayankk]

A duck walks into a pub and orders a
Coke and a ham sandwich.
The barman looks at him and says,
"Hang on! You're a duck."
"I see your eyes are working," replies
the duck.
"And you can talk!"Exclaims the barman.
"I see your ears are working, too,"Says
the duck.
"Now if you don't mind, can I have my
Coke and my sandwich please?"
"Certainly, sorry about that,"
Says the barman as he pulls the duck's
pint.
"It's just we don't get many ducks in this
pub.. What are you doing round this
way?"
"I'm working on the building site across
the road," Explains the duck.
"I'm a plasterer."
The flabbergasted barman cannot
believe the duck and wants to learn
more, but takes the hint when the duck
pulls out a newspaper from his bag and
proceeds to read it.
So, the duck reads his paper, drinks his
Coke, eats his sandwich, bids the
barman good day and leaves.
The same thing happens for two weeks.
Then one day the circus comes to town.
The ringmaster comes into the pub for a
pint and the barman says to him
"You're with the circus, aren't you?
Well, I know this duck that could be just
brilliant in your circus. He talks, drinks
Coke, eats sandwiches, reads the
newspaper and everything!"
"Sounds marvellous,"says the
ringmaster, handing over his business
card.
"Get him to give me a call."
So the next day when the duck comes
into the pub the barman says,
"Hey Mr. Duck, I reckon I can line you
up with a top job, paying really good
money."
"I'm always looking for the next job,"
Says the duck.
"Where is it?"
"At the circus," Says the barman.
"The circus?" Repeats the duck.
"That's right," Replies the barman.
"The circus?" The duck asks again "with
the big tent?"
"Yeah," the barman replies.
"With all the animals who live in cages,
and performers who live in caravans?"
says the duck.
"Of course," the barman replies.
"And the tent has canvas sides and a big
canvas roof with a hole in the middle?"
persists the duck.
"That's right!" says the barman.
The duck shakes his head in amazement,
and says .. ..
"What the hell would they want with a
plasterer??!"

[driving_smartly]

Boy: I like your "teeth" very much
.
.
.
.

Girl (smiled n said) : Oh really, Why??
.
.
.
.
.
.

Boy: Because "yellow" is my favourite colour .....!!!

[rahulk2510]

Forwarded message from Watsapp!

[rahul_sinha]

A man was shopping in a supermarket when a familiar looking lady approached him with a smile.

Lady "Hi, how are you doing?"
Man "uh-huh, do I know you?"
Lady "Yeah, you are the father of one of my kids"
Man with widened eyes "uhh! Are you .. err..by any chance that stripper from NY?"
Lady with, still a smile "No, I am the teacher of your son"

[selfdrive]

Received via SMS:
Seeing all those cheerleaders in the ongoing T20 world cup,
cannot really blame Raavan!

[sandsun7]

Seen on Facebook:

My Attitude:
A Girl proposed to me.
And I said:
"Sorry, I won't accept your proposal,
But I appreciate your
selection "

Another one:

KID: Why some of your hair are
White Dad ?
DAD: Every time a son make His dad unhappy, one Of his father's hair turns white.
KID : Now I understand why Grandpa's hairs are all white!

[ampere]

Not sure if you guys heard this PJ. Just heard this on Vividh Bharati! (I do hear the old vivid bharati once in a while)

A guy calls home tells mom that he may not be able to make it to home for the night,
as he has an ECG problem. Mom's flabbergasted; says she has not even seen grand kids.

The guy clarifies in the end : ECG means Engine Clutch Gear

What was that ? !

[Warwithwheels]

Customer: This chicken is too cold, Can you Warm it..?
KFC TVM: Sure, let me Worm it..

[akj53]

Suitable Comments are solicited

[amitoj]

Originally Posted by akj53

Suitable Comments are solicited

Very poor photoshop job.

[vivekiny2k]

Originally Posted by amitoj

Very poor photoshop job.

AND it's the other way round. Asanas in Yoga are inspired by various animals.

[mayankk]

Originally Posted by vivekiny2k

AND it's the other way round. Asanas in Yoga are inspired by various animals.

You have to wonder though, what the heck was he actually watching !

[sa_kiran]

The best gift you can give your woman is your undivided attention & unconditional love. Rest, she'll take from you, herself.

[mayankk]

And they forgive us everytime!!!