[Fordmanchau]

Originally Posted by Samurai

This happened today. I missed a falling coconut by one second while driving back from lunch. I was so shocked, I honked wildly at the coconut tree.
Couple seconds later I looked around to see if anyone saw me honking at the tree. Phew, there was nobody around.

This was funny, actually very funny, but it happens!!
Happens with me too, I honk at cows, dogs and what not.
It's just instinctive that your hand goes on the horn when you see anything in front at once.

[prateekm]

I guess this one would best fit in this topic.

About 2-3 months back, while doing a highway ride with friends, I notice that they are driving with their high-beams on. So, later when we return, I just told them this sentence in Marathi, "Tumhi headlight high-beam var ka thevun chalavta? Tumhala he nahi mahit ka high beam var chalavla tar gaadi kami mileage dete?" (Why do you ride your bikes with your headlight on high-beam? Don't you know that your bike will give you a lesser mileage if you continuously ride using your high-beam?)

Needless to say, those guys have completely stopped using the high-beam, at least when I am riding with them

[straightdrive]

Originally Posted by Samurai

This happened today. I missed a falling coconut by one second while driving back from lunch. I was so shocked, I honked wildly at the coconut tree....

LOL. Reminds me of a somewhat similar incident.

At one of my work places, often someone would bring us coffee at our desks. Once a colleague and I, discussing something, went to the coffee machine together. My colleague, talking to me all the time, collected his coffee and turned and said "Thanks" to the machine.

[anekho]

Originally Posted by prateekm

I guess this one would best fit in this topic.

About 2-3 months back, while doing a highway ride with friends, I notice that they are driving with their high-beams on. So, later when we return, I just told them this sentence in Marathi, "Tumhi headlight high-beam var ka thevun chalavta? Tumhala he nahi mahit ka high beam var chalavla tar gaadi kami mileage dete?" (Why do you ride your bikes with your headlight on high-beam? Don't you know that your bike will give you a lesser mileage if you continuously ride using your high-beam?)

Needless to say, those guys have completely stopped using the high-beam, at least when I am riding with them

And those guys probably posted it in the "Quirky logic and funny comments from non-petrol head friends" thread

[mayankk]

Originally Posted by straightdrive

LOL. Reminds me of a somewhat similar incident.

At one of my work places, often someone would bring us coffee at our desks. Once a colleague and I, discussing something, went to the coffee machine together. My colleague, talking to me all the time, collected his coffee and turned and said "Thanks" to the machine.

i reached out once to help a mannequin up in khan market, which i had bumped into and knocked over, apologizing.
unfortunately, i WAS seen and smiled at by a lot of people.......
and i am sure they werent "oh, such a nice guy " smiles...

[prateekm]

Originally Posted by anekho

And those guys probably posted it in the "Quirky logic and funny comments from non-petrol head friends" thread

Haha! I knew there was no logic in it, but I guess that was the only way to stop them using the high-beams. Anyways, they believed it and that's what matters

[gopikb]

This happened way back in 1992 when I was just out of college and landed in my first job in Bangalore. I was new to Kannada language and knew very few words then. I boarded a bus from KR Puram to MG Road and since the bus was crowded, I passed the money through other passengers to get a ticket for myself from conductor.

After some time, the conductor came inside the bus and noticed that he didnot remember me buying a ticket from him. So here goes the conversation

conductor : ticket, ticket
Me: Koduthine (Means "I will give you"; Actually I had meant to say "I have already taken" for which i should have said "ticket Kottu Ayuthu" )
conductor : "kodi" (Give)
Me: Koduthine (started looking outside window turning away from him)
conductor : Aaargh ..."kodi" (Give)
Me: Koduthine
Conductor : "@#^&$*& Kodi" (Did not understand what he cursed, but everybody in the bus started laughing)
Me : Realizing there is something terribly wrong, I took the ticket from my pocket and showed him
Conductor: Started banging his head with his hand cursing all the while and moved on. Everybody in bus were laughing. To this date I really dont know what he was cursing me in kannada.

[vivekiny2k]

Originally Posted by mayankk

i reached out once to help a mannequin up in khan market, which i had bumped into and knocked over, apologizing.
unfortunately, i WAS seen and smiled at by a lot of people.......
and i am sure they werent "oh, such a nice guy " smiles...

almost everybody gets this in madam tussad's wax museum where they have kept some wax statues right in between the walking path. and they are posing as if they are trying to take a pic, staying still.

[rjstyles69]

Originally Posted by Samurai

This happened today. I missed a falling coconut by one second while driving back from lunch. I was so shocked, I honked wildly at the coconut tree.

Couple seconds later I looked around to see if anyone saw me honking at the tree. Phew, there was nobody around.

You aren't alone Monsieur , my cab driver the other day honked crazy when he was approaching a speed breaker. I was surprised and asked him why did he do that ? The dude never had an answer started laughing.

[Maverick1977]

Whilst @my tuition class, we all used to sit around a table, one rainy day a small insect lands on the table near our teacher. He instantaneously smacks it out of the table & then say "Sorry bhai". We all simply burst out. Unfortunately the poor old man could not understand the reason for our laughter.

[noopster]

What a cool thread! In splits reading about some people's real-life experiences here. Couple of mine to add:

Second year of B-School, first lecture in Marketing, a classful of wannabe yuppies eager to impress the new Prof. Our Marketing prof the year before had quit- an urbane, posh guy who'd left us with quite a few impressive-sounding buzzwords in our vocabulary.

Alas, our second-year prof was a 25-year veteran of the old school and not exactly in the same league as his predeccessor. His first question to us: "What's the first rule of Marketing?"

Now we all "knew" this, because our posh prof the prvious year had drilled it into our malleabale minds: cherchez le creneau, French for "find a hole (and fill it)".

One of our classmates was raising his hand higher than anyone else and the unfortunate Professor picked him to answer.
"Haan, you, tell me... what is the answer?"
"Chacha la kaanu!"
"What? Kya bola?"
"Chacha la kaanu! Chacha la kaanu!"

We were all rolling in the aisles laughing by now and the Prof was just staring in bewilderment. It took while for peace to return to the classroom.

The story has an interesting post-script. When the hilarity finally died down, someone asked the Prof, what exactly *was* the first rule of Marketing? His terse reply: "Keep it stupid simple".

He meant of course the popular KISS concept (Keep it simple, stupid)- unfortunately he got that wrong too! Just wasn't his day.

---
A year or two later in my first job as a sales manager trainee in a consumer goods company, I was doing the beat with the company sales rep handling routine retailer complaints and the like. The company had just launched a cooking oil that was advertised as being lower in fat than the leading brand of the time. This kirana shop owner was insistent that the company's SR had ripped him off the previous year:
Shopkeeper: "Saab, company ne offer chalaya, lekin yeh (pointing to my SR) humko kuch nahi diyaa"
Me (shocked): "Is that so? The company certainly treats tampering with consumer offers very seriously. Please mujhe details dijiye"
Shopkeeper (smugly): "Haan saab. Aapne XYZ pe "88% fat free" ka offer chalaya tha na? Humko kuch nahi milaa!"
I had a tough time keeping a straight face explaining to the poor shopkeeper that 88% fat free did not mean that we gave an extra 88% of fat to every paying customer. Later on, over a chai, laughed over how seemingly great-sounding taglines fail in the marketplace for the silliest of reasons!

[mayankk]

Originally Posted by noopster

The story has an interesting post-script. When the hilarity finally died down, someone asked the Prof, what exactly *was* the first rule of Marketing? His reply: "Keep it stupid simple".

He meant of course the popular KISS concept (Keep it simple, stupid)- unfortunately he got that wrong too! Just wasn't his day.

I can imagine the classroom!!
Its surprising that what people's perception of what happens in b-schools , and the kind of hilarity that occurs, quite commonly, is so poles apart!!

PS:actually, "keep it stupid simple" seems to make more sense now that i read it.
especially when reporting in , if you know what i mean!!

[selfdrive]

Originally Posted by noopster

I had a tough time keeping a straight face explaining to the poor shopkeeper that 88% fat free did not mean that we gave an extra 88% of fat to every paying customer. Later on, over a chai, laughed over how seemingly great-sounding taglines fail in the marketplace for the silliest of reasons!

Noop; reminds me of a fabulous argument at 7am on a Sunday morning. I was waiting bleary eyed at a shop in Kothrud to pick up some bread. The shopkeeper had just given a pack of margarine (or cholestorol free butter) to a lady.
lady customer 1: is mein free likha hai, woh kahaan hai?
shopkeeper: ek minute, dekhta hoon (scrutinising the pack and scratching his head)
customer 2: arey woh cholestorol free hai
lady & shopkeeper: kya?
me: arey cholestorol yaar (yawning)
customer 3: charbi, charbi
shopkeeper: bolo, koi charbi kyun free dega
customer 3: tu hi dekh le kya free hai phir
lady: yeh sab dukaanwaale free wala maal bech detey hain aur phir kuch bahaana banaatey hain

This lady insisted that she wanted the free gift. I and the other equally drowsy souls didnt have the heart to point it out to her especially as she didnt get the cholestorol concept. Finally the shopkeeper took mercy on us and told her that she will find the free gift inside the packet! While she was scrutinising the pack, I made my purchases and scooted from there

[theexperthand]

This happened few days back. Our apartment have monkey menace and no one keeps any of the windows open. We were returning after our evening walk and was surprised to see that one of the flat owner have kept a window wide open. I thought he\she might forgotten to close the window and knocked on the door. An elderly lady opened the door and I told her that the window is open and monkey may get in. She smiled sheepishly and told "Son, there were some mosquitoes in the room. I kept the window open so that the mosquitoes may go out".

[royalcruiser]

Nice thread Lemme start recollecting one by one.

I guess this happened in our 12th Physics class. The prof/teacher teaching us started off explaining about acceleration, its formulas etc.

After completing acceleration, the prof goes "Ok, so now lets switch to d*ckceleration". The entire class erupted in laughter - thankfully 'twas a boys-only school and saved the fairer sex the embarrassment! The surprising part was that the prof never realised why we all laughed and kept pronouncing deceleration in the most scandalous manner!