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Old 29th May 2017, 18:11   #9736
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Re: The Official Joke thread

Why would anyone want to use the staircase when they are already on the ground floor, when there is a fire? Would it be to rescue someone? But then, the picture also shows a person going down! I suppose one would want that to be handled by trained firemen.

In addition, "serves to all floor"?
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Old 29th May 2017, 18:44   #9737
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Re: The Official Joke thread

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Originally Posted by swissknife View Post
Why would anyone want to use the staircase when they are already on the ground floor, when there is a fire?
Perhaps the basement/parking. Emergency assembly area?

Quote:
In addition, "serves to all floor"?
A *lot* of lifts, especially in high rise towers or buildings where a large of floors are owned by one company have lifts that serve in various combinations:

- even/odd floors only
- Basement/LG/UG floor only
- Only floors that are owned by a particular company

They do this to balance out load so it's a particular lift is not stopping on every floor of a 20-storey building!
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Old 30th May 2017, 08:50   #9738
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Re: The Official Joke thread

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Originally Posted by libranof1987 View Post
Perhaps the basement/parking. Emergency assembly area?



A *lot* of lifts, especially in high rise towers or buildings where a large of floors are owned by one company have lifts that serve in various combinations:

- even/odd floors only
- Basement/LG/UG floor only
- Only floors that are owned by a particular company

They do this to balance out load so it's a particular lift is not stopping on every floor of a 20-storey building!

Generally and as a saftey practice, the emergency assembly areas are on the ground floor of building complexes.

On the other one - "serves all floor"; the attention was expected to be on the English language and not about how lifts operate
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Old 31st May 2017, 10:54   #9739
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Re: The Official Joke thread

Presenting the new 2016 Honda City albeit in 2017. Did not know where else to post it.
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Old 31st May 2017, 13:29   #9740
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Re: The Official Joke thread

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Originally Posted by swissknife View Post
Why would anyone want to use the staircase when they are already on the ground floor, when there is a fire?
In addition, "serves to all floor"?
Probably, it meant, if in case, any one is fired from the job, don't use lift. instead, use staircase and go down to car parking and drive away !
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Old 31st May 2017, 14:15   #9741
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Re: The Official Joke thread

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Originally Posted by gkveda View Post
Probably, it meant, if in case, any one is fired from the job, don't use lift. instead, use staircase and go down to car parking and drive away !

In that case the sign should have read "In case of being fired"

An additional sign saying, 'In case of hire" take the elevator would be appropriate as well
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Old 31st May 2017, 14:22   #9742
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Re: The Official Joke thread

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Originally Posted by TorqueyTechie View Post
Presenting the new 2016 Honda City albeit in 2017. Did not know where else to post it.
Must have been intended as a gift to be given to new owners of Honda City. Like the car, the tumbler too must have remained undelivered because of the onslaught of Ciaz .

I remember getting what was claimed to be a silver tumbler as a gift with a Sangeetha Mobiles sticker pasted on it, on purchase of a handset in 2009. That there was not even a sliver of silver on the tumbler was a bit disappointing though .
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Old 31st May 2017, 16:13   #9743
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Re: The Official Joke thread

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I remember getting what was claimed to be a silver tumbler as a gift with a Sangeetha Mobiles sticker pasted on it, on purchase of a handset in 2009. That there was not even a sliver of silver on the tumbler was a bit disappointing though .
Stainless Steel in Tamil speak is 'ever-silver'. Maybe they missed out in mentioning 'ever' or you may have forgotten. There are lot may such quirks around here - most of them have been mentioned in the English thread

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Old 31st May 2017, 16:22   #9744
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Re: The Official Joke thread

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Originally Posted by TorqueyTechie View Post
Presenting the new 2016 Honda City albeit in 2017. Did not know where else to post it.
I guess they will be soon coming up with the 2017 edition too. This might be old stock clearance.
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Old 1st June 2017, 20:45   #9745
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Re: The Official Joke thread

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In addition, "serves to all floor"?
This reminds me of a joke that I observe almost every day. I am pretty sure this is observed in many place else too.

In my work place building, there are offices of many companies. In the same floor too there would be at least two/three offices of different companies. That's why there are no less than 8 elevators serving every floor. Out of this, four stops at even floors and four at odd floors.

If you press the up/down button of any lift in the even floor, it will automatically turn on the up/down button of all lifts designated for that floor. Similarly for the odd floors. Mostly the nearest available lift car will stop at the floor.

So, there are these people who are leaving office and going back home. They are usually in a hurry, either to catch the train, take the shuttle bus or get the Uber/Ola they must have booked 10 mins back. Obviously they all want to go to the ground floor in a hurry.

They come and one of them press the 'up' button. Everyone's eyes are glued to the indicator that shows the lift is passing through which floor. One person notices that one of the lifts is coming next, so he runs and stands close to the door of that lift. The other bunch of people follow him blindly and occupy even more space in front of that lift. Indicator shows it has reached the floor but it does not stop. Then one guy reads the message on the top showing that this lift does not serve that particular floor. Everyone looks at the first guy who, upon realizing his folly had already started doing something on his phone. Some of them start cursing under their breath, some animated ones curse the lift system saying that these lifts never work properly. Now a few of them again press the "up" button repeatedly as if doing that will somehow increase the speed of the lift car. Funny thing is this is done by different people as if different people with different strength can summon the lift in a faster way. One even runs around pressing the buttons of all lifts on that floor, maybe he thinks that some buttons may not get automatically turned on (even though the indicator lights are on).

Finally there is a "ding" announcing the impending arrival of the lift and everyone flocks to that lift. The lift stops, doors open, they try to barge in when one of them notice it is going up. He immediately warns other passengers that this lift is going up so don't board. This guy seemed very elated being a good Samaritan until some other people start asking passengers inside the lift, is it going up or down (even if you see the indicator showing, the car is going up), people inside motion with their index fingers indicating the car is going up. Now those outside give a sigh, some say ***, some roll their eyes, some give a "click" sound with their tongue and then press the 'up' button again.

The blokes who booked Uber/Ola cabs desperately call their drivers saying that the lifts are not working, so please wait for me. Others again press 'up' button hoping that they can catch the next lift that goes down. Then one fellow is so frustrated that he presses both buttons 'up' and 'down'. I guess it must be the guy who will either miss his train or the shuttle bus. Magically, his unintended action has the desired result. One lift that was going down stops and the door opens. By now self doubt of people has increased manifold, so they ask people inside if the lift is going up or down, again index finger indications all around doing majority of the communication.

When everyone is convinced the lift is going down, time to barge into the lift ... who cares if someone wanted to get off at this floor or not. No one wants to go through the cycle of waiting for the lift again, right!! Any poor fellow who wanted to get out on that floor and couldn't make the first move would have to ride the lift again.

I notice this every day. And this same thing happens over and over again. People do change but even with same people the behavior remains notoriously same.

One day I couldn't resist myself. After this has happened again that day I go and ask these people meekly .. "Friends, why do you press the 'up' button when you intend to go 'down' in the lift."

They stare at me with wide open eyes and a gaping mouth as if I had asked a blasphemous question.

Then one of them say : "Well, if we press the 'up' button, only then the lift will come 'up'"

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Old 2nd June 2017, 07:47   #9746
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SWMBO does it every time. Her logic - I am calling the lift to come up. Not strangely, if the lift were at a higher floor, she promptly presses 'Down'. I explained a few times, but she remembers my explanation AFTER pushing the button.
Sigh.!
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Old 2nd June 2017, 07:56   #9747
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Re: The Official Joke thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by sukhoi30 View Post
This reminds me of a joke that I observe almost every day. I am pretty sure this is observed in many place else too.

.....
One day I couldn't resist myself. After this has happened again that day I go and ask these people meekly .. "Friends, why do you press the 'up' button when you intend to go 'down' in the lift."

They stare at me with wide open eyes and a gaping mouth as if I had asked a blasphemous question.

Then one of them say : "Well, if we press the 'up' button, only then the lift will come 'up'"

I can't decide whether to laugh or go red!! I see this happening every day and every time that I take the elevator. There are some others who are unsure of which buttons to press, they press both directions!

I had even suggested that the building administrators put up a sign saying "Press the button which shows the direction you wish to travel" but this has not happened yet. I suppose the administrator is travelling in the wrong direction on some lift ;
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Old 2nd June 2017, 09:31   #9748
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Quote:
Originally Posted by swissknife View Post
I can't decide whether to laugh or go red!! I see this happening every day and every time that I take the elevator. There are some others who are unsure of which buttons to press, they press both directions!

I had even suggested that the building administrators put up a sign saying "Press the button which shows the direction you wish to travel" but this has not happened yet. I suppose the administrator is travelling in the wrong direction on some lift ;
I thought this happened only in my office building. You're in a crowded elevator slowly going up. And then the lift stops, and the dude outside asks? "Going down?" and you can see the arrow pointing up. This seems to happen especially when I step out for coffee and I'm late for a meeting.
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Old 10th June 2017, 17:26   #9749
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Re: The Official Joke thread

Q: Why does a chicken coop have two doors?

A: If it had four, it would be a chicken sedan.
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Old 16th June 2017, 14:10   #9750
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Re: The Official Joke thread

REJOICE BENGALURIANS! Practice yoga and enjoy free rides on Namma Metro!
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