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Old 20th April 2022, 15:11   #1636
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Re: Emigrating to a Foreign Land!

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Originally Posted by AutoConsultant View Post
Hi all, I am also in kind of a similar conundrum. Hoping to get some advice!
Compared to OP - you are way younger and don't have kids yet (as per the post). So you can take the risk to gain foreign experience and also will have a longer period to build the new life in US, if desired. So from that perspective you are slightly better placed.

But, your pre-tax figure is very good at this age and is bound to go up in future in 90% of the cases. So financially there is no motive for you and your wife to move/relocate. With this double income, you can build a very good and comfortable life (better than many other places on the face of this earth) here and I personally would prefer that. But that is just me.

So simply decide your priority - money or foreign work experience, and then take the call.

(Note: I personally studied abroad for a year and came back home immediately for personal reasons. So my experience of living abroad is very limited. But a lot of my friends and relatives have done both - relocated for good and also worked abroad for few years and come back and hence I have first hand information of the challenges that they faced and advantages they had in say US v/s India. Based on all this, I would prefer to earn well in India and be with my Family here and have a more comfortable life.)

Last edited by sunilch : 20th April 2022 at 15:14.
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Old 20th April 2022, 15:15   #1637
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Re: Emigrating to a Foreign Land!

Thank you for all the responses. It helped a lot in making a decision. For now, my wife will go alone, I stay in India with the children. She will try to get a green card, and if that happens we will also join her. Else, she will come back. Worst case, she comes back to India with a lot of independence and will be in a better shape to handle things.


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Originally Posted by wheeledwanderer View Post

3. I would like to retire back in India because cost of living is cheaper, all kind of domestic help is available (available but very expensive in the western world, approx. USD 40/- per hour for a plumber), medical care is easily accessible and many more.
I agree. I too have no intention of indefinitely staying outside India.

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Originally Posted by wheeledwanderer View Post
4.As a parent, i will not decide what is a better prospect for my children.

5. Culture: This is something which we need to put up with. One of my friend said that his daughter bought her boyfriend home at age 14 and they spend hours in the house. One need to ask, as an Asian family man, is this something which we can live with? This apart from easy access to narcotic substances in the western world.
I feel those points are contradictory. Intentionally or otherwise, my wife and I decide a lot of things for my children, especially since they are only 4 and 6 years old. If they are outside India, they can choose to go to college in India, in case they are interested. Currently, we may decide a lot for them, but that doesn't mean that we are going to force them to do something at a later stage.

Also, if at a later stage in life, they decide to do something that is legal but not acceptable as per Indian culture, I would hardly object to their choice. It is their life, and my opinion as a parent is that I will try to provide as many options as possible to my children. Once they reach an age where they can decide for themselves, I will not even provide unsolicited advice let alone force them to do anything.



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Originally Posted by the_joker View Post
I wouldn't do it if I were in your place. I would invest in my kids education so that they can move to any country they wish to after their 12th. As others have pointed out, your employment authorization may take months - years to get approved. What about the lost income during this period?
Appreciate your opinion. My thought process is also on similar lines. My wife will try for green card, and at the same time, I will try for H1B. If either succeeds, we will move to US. Otherwise, she will come back to India.

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Originally Posted by AltoLXI View Post
Reminds me of the 1996 Kannada film "America America" where the husband, Shashank, after losing his job, was unable to come to terms with his wife working and being a breadwinner.
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Originally Posted by Jaguar View Post
Many times ego comes into play, especially when the woman is the primary breadwinner.
I will be happy to work in some low paying job as long as it is not physically demanding (like construction). Thinking about it, I wouldn't mind being a truck driver. I'm sure the children wouldn't mind it as long as I don't come home too often.

Quote:
Originally Posted by neil.jericho View Post
- Your current jobs (including future growth prospects), joint CTC, assets and age of your children make this different from the usual H1B situation. Consider the financial aspect very strongly.

- Im surprised that you still dont have clarity on the close to final salary that your wife will likely make. It just takes a few phone calls and some friendly chatter to get this information.


A large part of applying for the H1B visa, is preparedness.
Thanks a lot for your response. This comment has shaken my wife into action. She has started checking about the salaries and other details. Looks like she will earn around $120,000, which is much better than the amount which she learnt during her initial enquiries.

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Originally Posted by amol4184 View Post
4-5-6 years a very long time for to not do any work. If your wife is okay, she can switch after going to USA (and preferably to non-Indian company) and ask the new employer to file for green card. Once that is approved, which itself takes 6-8 months, you can file for EAD. The EAD is currently taking anything between 4-8 months.
Thank you! That is definitely an option that we are exploring.
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Old 20th April 2022, 15:24   #1638
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Re: Emigrating to a Foreign Land!

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Originally Posted by Kruz Nhux View Post
Out of curiosity, what is the appeal for schooling in US over India? There are loads of options here. Don't mean to offend anyone but can someone enlighten me.
All good options here are paid for and private with limited power for us the parents (the consumers of this paid service), when needed.

In US, primary education is free but we pay for it indirectly - you have to live in the desired good neighborhood if there is a particular target high school where you want your kids to go. So you end up paying higher rents. Depending upon situation, you may also be required to spend more on fuel if you have to travel to work . But you get good quality education and the parents there are usually more active and participate quite well in overall wellbeing of the school in their area. That is something that may not be easy to achieve here.

But, I guess most of the posts here are for higher education (Graduation) and not primary education. Good quality higher education is way easier to afford and enroll into in USA.
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Old 20th April 2022, 15:53   #1639
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Re: Emigrating to a Foreign Land!

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Originally Posted by KL01toKA03 View Post
Currently, we may decide a lot for them, but that doesn't mean that we are going to force them to do something at a later stage.

Also, if at a later stage in life, they decide to do something that is legal but not acceptable as per Indian culture, I would hardly object to their choice. It is their life, and my opinion as a parent is that I will try to provide as many options as possible to my children. Once they reach an age where they can decide for themselves, I will not even provide unsolicited advice let alone force them to do anything.
I have no useful advice to offer you about the main discussion point of this thread, re. shift or not, but I just had to log in to applaud this sentiment and thinking! Kudos to you sir, this is parenting!

Also surprised that the kind of thought process lots of my friends were subject to when they shifted to the US after college more than 2 decades(!) ago still prevails, viz. "kids in the US will get hooked on drugs", "kids will misuse freedoms to mingle with the opposite gender!" I thought we were way past those stereotypes (especially since both those scenarios are (and have always been) hardly non-existent right here at home!), but apparently not!

I guess the only consideration you need to ponder is the financial one, whether that makes sense or not. Good luck with your decision and future!

Last edited by am1m : 20th April 2022 at 15:59.
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Old 20th April 2022, 17:19   #1640
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Re: Emigrating to a Foreign Land!

You are making a very good income here. I don't think you will be able to make an income which has the same buying power in the US in the near future, especially if you are starting at 85k. Also, things like domestic help really make a huge difference in the quality of life , which is extremely expensive in the US.
Don't be under the impression that an education in India is inferior. Your kids can make a decision where they want to live when they grow up, like mine did. My son is doing his MBBS in Kerala, and my daughter her engineering in NIT Trichy. Both of them are happy here, despite me offering to send them abroad for their education. So don't go just for the sake of the kids. Leave it to their decision.
An upheaval and resettling is more and more difficult as age passes. And what about your roots here? Are you sure that leaving behind loved ones here after all these years is easy?
Compared to twenty years back, India has grown in leaps and bounds in the quality of life. Believe me, I used to envy all the things my sister in the US had 25 yrs back, but now I have almost everything she can have over there. Actually she envies me now, seeing the buying power I have with my income. She used to press me to come over and settle there, but I have never regretted my decision to stay back.
Don't go. This is the advice of an old man nearing half a century of life.
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Old 20th April 2022, 18:04   #1641
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Re: Emigrating to a Foreign Land!

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Originally Posted by AutoConsultant View Post
I am really confused by the visa complications and thinking if it is even worth all the hassle? We do not have any major liabilities and lead a pretty comfortable lifestyle here. However the foreign experience would be a huge boost for my wife's career. Help!
If you have never been to US before, I would say, go for it and have fun. It's life changing experience (At least, it was for me!). It also will look good on your resume.

If your employer can file your L1, nothing like it. Cannot comment on job prospects on H4. So do your due diligence.

Please do let us know what your final decision is.

Last edited by aah78 : 21st April 2022 at 17:51. Reason: Spacing.
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Old 20th April 2022, 20:40   #1642
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Re: Emigrating to a Foreign Land!

As eyeman pointed, out the difference in quality of life and comforts between the US and India has narrowded substantially in the last 15 years. One used to say that you can have a car that's three times as big in the US compared to India, but that is no longer true. With your kind of income, you can easily afford a Kia Carnival, which is exactly the same size of a minivan as those mainstream ones found in the US. One can get country club memberships at reasonable price points in India, that allow access to high quality sports and recreation, making up for lack of publicly available amenities. On the bonus side one can never get the kind of domestic help, cook, driver, security people and other assistance that is possible in India at your income level, in the US with a 80K salary. You are on your own - for shopping, cooking, cleaning, laundry, washing your car, garbage disposal (and gardening, lawn mowing, leaf raking etc. if you happen to take an independent house, which is possible in Plano) - your weekends will be busier than your week days and you will have no time for cerebral stuff or to pursue your passions. Today with your kind of income level, you can get so much more "life" in India today, so I would recommend not to go.
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Old 20th April 2022, 21:40   #1643
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Re: Emigrating to a Foreign Land!

I am not quite sure if this is the right thread to post.(mods please delete/merge if required). But in recent times I have seen/heard a lot of people who have been in the US for say a decent amount of time, move back to India. And unlike before, the reasons aren't just visa related or about ailing parents but fair enough career/business opportunities. I am curious, has the job/business field changed so much?
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Old 20th April 2022, 22:51   #1644
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Re: Emigrating to a Foreign Land!

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Originally Posted by KL01toKA03 View Post
My wife has been selected in the H1B lottery. Now, assuming that she gets the visa, we have a major decision to make and would appreciate suggestions from people who have faced similar situations. Here is some background on our realities:
Let me try to answer some of the doubts here. I stay in California since 2014 and hence think might be able to help you here. First things first, Texas is a booming place and Plano is a nice city to live and raise a family. Most of us would like to move to Texas as there is no Federal tax. You can a lot from your paycheck. Having said that $85K is not a good amount for family of 4. Let me explain.

- Housing pricing have soared in Texas as thousands of people moved from costlier states like CA. Majority of these people enjoying same salary as they used to get in CA and due to less TAX in TX they have more disposable money now. This had raised prices in TX. Another reason being the opening of Giga factory by Tesla. In 2021 employers like Apple, HP,Oracle encouraged employees to move to TX. One reason is political as well as TX is red state.

- In your day to day living expense , rent is only a part. Normally for Indians , we try to find housing where fellow Indians stay and where we have good schools. These places have higher rent. Moreover since you've 2 kids , I assume they do extracurricular activities. School is free but the charges for extra curricular activities like swimming, summer camp, martial arts, math tuition really adds up.

- Visa issues- You'll be in H4 Visa. You need to file for EAD (employee authorization document) to start working. Processing for EAD through I765 itself takes 6-7 months. That's one part of agony. As and when your dependent Visa expires, you'll have to extend it.

At present the processing of H4 visa takes hell lot of time. Say your wife has H1 visa from 2022-2025. Next time wife's employers extend Visa for another 3 yrs. Parallelly they will extend dependents H4 VISA(yours) through Form I539. In 2025 when the extension processing starts , wife's employers can extend her H1B though premium processing which takes 2-3 working weeks. Unfortunately there is no premium processing for H4 VISA. On an average it takes 6-8 months . For you you'll have to extend your H4 VISA as well as EAD . You can only extend EAD once you've valid H4 VISA with expiry dates in future. As long as H4 Visa is in extension process, you're EAD stays EXPIRED. You wont be able to work.

Good news is. USCIS have announced premium processing for EAD. But the dates have not been finalized yet.

Green card process is another pain in the butt. You'll have to wait for eternity to get for Green Card unless it's filed in EB1 category. Without Green Card , every time you travel to India, the first job is to get VISA stamp on passport.

Now let me try to answer your biggest fears:

What are my biggest fears:

1. Will I be able to find a job in Technical Writing? I do not know anyone from India who is a technical writer in USA. Is it realistic to get a job in a software company while on an H-4 visa?

You may find a job. I'm an optimistic person and never take no for an answer (except when I'm speaking to my wife). But to keep the job you need VISA and EAD at all times. As I mentioned above most of the time you'll find you're EAD is out of status. Continuity of job in dependent VISA is an immense challenge. You'll be in and out of job.

2. How difficult is it to find a job as a dependent of an H1B visa holder? Is there any bias against such people since there is a chance that they might lose their authorization to work if the H1B visa expires.

Please remember employers pick H4 VISA holders as last resort. Reason being they know uncertainty of VISA situation. Nobody ants to hire person who is at work for 2 yrs, then stays out of status for 8 months and resumes job after EAD/VISA issues get sorted. there is huge risk involved and employers try to take advantage of this. They'll pay you peanuts saying that they're absorbing the risk on behalf of you.

3. Is it possible to extend the H1B visa indefinitely (providing the current policies do not change)? It does not make much sense for me to leave a stable and well-paying job and come back without a job after a few months.

H1B VISA only gets extended when employers file Green Card through Form I140. There are 3 categories to file GC-EB1/EB2/EB3. Under EB1 you get GC in 1 yr. Under EB2/EB3 it's a horror story. Average wait time is 10-12 years. There are lot of stories in internet. As you wait to get GC, you need to have valid document to continue to work in US. That's called H1 extension. When you've approved form I140, your employer can request extension of H1 Visa for another 3 yrs. This process continues till you get GC and no longer need H1B VISA.

There is no guarantee that every extension will be approved. USCIS may issue RFE (Request for evidence) and employers need to provide additional documents. If USCIS is not satisfied they may reject and you're family needs to come back.

In Short: In my opinion US is a nice place to move in but it depends where you're coming from. I came because of monetary issue , I did not have any savings in India and thought moving to US will make me financially stable. I was aware of CA tax, soaring rent price, Visa issues etc...

You sir, have stable income and 2 house(one which is paid off). You need at least $100K-$110K to live comfortable. I know it's possible with 2 income. But I'm not sure about your job prospect.

Few tips: Try to gauge job opportunities in and around Plano area. I assume you can work from home as technical writer. Try to engage with local desi consultancies. They can take care of a lot of paperwork but will not give good salary.

Fingers crossed on premium processing for EAD. That would solve lot of issues.

Unless you're not sure of your job status, situation will be tight. Try to see rent price near Plano for 2 bedroom and you'll have an idea. You need car, insurance, medical, dental, visual and all odd expenses. Factor in expense to travel back home every 2-3 yrs in summer. Ticket price alone will be $4000-$6000.

Please look for opportunities in your field of work and then you can move with double income. You've lot going for you in India.

All the best.

Last edited by aah78 : 21st April 2022 at 17:52. Reason: Spacing fixed, quote trimmed. Please quote only relevant sections of posts. Thanks!
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Old 20th April 2022, 23:37   #1645
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Re: Emigrating to a Foreign Land!

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Originally Posted by KL01toKA03 View Post
My wife has been selected in the H1B lottery. Now, assuming that she gets the visa, we have a major decision to make and would appreciate suggestions from people who have faced similar situations.
Don't want to add to all the useful suggestions already given by others. Every suggestion has perspectives, merits, and demerits that you can analyze.

Just wanted to add slight out-of-box options to think over.

Option 1:
If you are inclined, you can do a 1 year Masters or Ph.D in the US while your wife works. Of course, you have to get an F1/student visa. It will be a tough year or more but can pay dividends depending on what you want to do later. I have seen many spouses take this route. Though this is not everyone's cup of chai.

Option 2:
Consider other countries. Like, for example, The Netherlands, Singapore, etc. Provided your wife has a chance to choose where to move to.

In my opinion, these countries are better than others for the following reasons.
1) Equally advanced in terms of lifestyle or education/exposure for kids or to an extent job market
2) Countries like NL allow spouses to work from day one
3) These may not be as great as the US in terms of saving potential or as many job prospects but can offer stability in terms of the visa situation
4) I am sure you can find a technical writer job easily in any of the other countries. Or for that matter switch careers.

Last edited by BusyBoyKK : 20th April 2022 at 23:43.
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Old 20th April 2022, 23:42   #1646
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Re: Emigrating to a Foreign Land!

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Originally Posted by CARNAMA View Post
- Visa issues- You'll be in H4 Visa. You need to file for EAD(employee authorization document) to start working. Processing for EAD through I765 itself takes 6-7 months. That's one part of agony. As and when your dependent Visa expires, you'll have to extend it.

At present the processing of H4 visa takes hell lot of time. Say your wife has H1 visa from 2022-2025. Next time wife's employers extend Visa for another 3 yrs. Parallelly they will extend dependents H4 VISA(yours) through Form I539. In 2025 when the extension processing starts , wife's employers can extend her H1B though premium processing which takes 2-3 working weeks. Unfortunately there is no premium processing for H4 VISA. On an average it takes 6-8 months . For you you'll have to extend your H4 VISA as well as EAD . You can only extend EAD once you've valid H4 VISA with expiry dates in future. As long as H4 Visa is in extension process, you're EAD stays EXPIRED. You wont be able to work.
USA has made its visa process/GC so complicated, I plainly find it very insulting to deal with it. I said goodbye to H1-B in 2004, never filed for GC and returned back to India. My son is an USC and has zero interest in going to USA. Since he has OCI, he has no harrowing visa restrictions on working in India.
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Old 21st April 2022, 00:04   #1647
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Re: Emigrating to a Foreign Land!

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Originally Posted by KL01toKA03 View Post
Option 1: We get the visa processed for the entire family through her employer. Only my wife travels initially. My kids and I join later, and I search for a job after going there.

It will be difficult to manage both children alone, especially since my daughter will have classes till 1 PM and I have to be in office a few days a week.
Do go. Choose option 1. It will be difficult in the beginning for you to manage the kids alone but you can always get the help from a family member or hire a caretaker/baby sitter. You will be able to afford one in India.

Find a job for an experienced tech worker will not be difficult in today's times. You can also look at freelancing or remote jobs once you are in the US.

This is a golden opportunity, grab it with both hands.
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Old 21st April 2022, 03:51   #1648
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Re: Emigrating to a Foreign Land!

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I plainly find it very insulting to deal with it.
Totally agree 101% on this point. Heck we faced some scenarios with a insult flavor when I was there on just a visitor visa! Can't imagine how a H1b process could be. I believe any one who is not a US Citizen is referred to as a 'Alien'. Can't be more insulting than this!
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Old 21st April 2022, 04:27   #1649
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Re: Emigrating to a Foreign Land!

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Originally Posted by wheeledwanderer View Post
Disclaimer: This is purely my view and I do not intend to demean or argue on others decision in the public forum. Each one has their own reasoning, this is mine.

1. My personal belief is "If one is doing well in his current profession (irrespective of location), continue doing it, unless there is something FIRM and BETTER is available" Again each has to do his due diligence before taking it up whatever challenges lay ahead of him/her.
As someone who took the jump without the assurance of what lies ahead, i disagree. If each generation never took the risk of seeking new opportunities, all our respective lives would be very different.

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Originally Posted by wheeledwanderer View Post
5. Culture: This is something which we need to put up with. One of my friend said that his daughter bought her boyfriend home at age 14 and they spend hours in the house. One need to ask, as an Asian family man, is this something which we can live with? This apart from easy access to narcotic substances in the western world.
A lot of my friends (males) who only grew up in India lost their virginity way before they finished school. Clearly, it's not like kids growing up in India is as sacred as we imagine them to be. Difference is that in India parents seem unaware of what's going on while they live in a utopian world, while it is more of an announced event in the Western world.

Narcotics and access to drugs -> My opinion is the same as above.

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9. Making an asset takes years of hard work, selling it to start afresh is something which i would not do personally.
This i agree with. Your aim should be to supplement your assets and draw a line somewhere in terms of where to abort and fall back to Plan B.

I do not say one place is better than the other, that's for the individual to decide and act according to what suits their situation. My point is merely to contest pre-conceived notions people may have which influence decisions.
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Old 21st April 2022, 07:37   #1650
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Re: Emigrating to a Foreign Land!

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Originally Posted by adi060711 View Post
But in recent times I have seen/heard a lot of people who have been in the US for say a decent amount of time, move back to India. And unlike before, the reasons aren't just visa related or about ailing parents but fair enough career/business opportunities.
That's exactly right. A few of my cousins are pleading with their children to return to India.

My two cents worth:

If your family/spouse is large and has siblings to look for the parents, you/spouse can move there and visit India as needed.

One of my cousins has five brothers and sisters, and her husband's family is large enough to care for his parents as well. As a result, they relocated to another country and financially supported both sides.
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