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Old 9th December 2011, 16:31   #5881
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Re: The Official Joke thread

--removed---

Geez!!
Apologies, travelwriter.

Quote:
Originally Posted by selfdrive View Post
Mine has a further twist.
My wife agrees that I am wrong and then I say sorry.
You, sir, are a terrestrial!!

Last edited by mayankk : 9th December 2011 at 16:35.
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Old 9th December 2011, 16:32   #5882
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Re: The Official Joke thread

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Originally Posted by mayankk View Post
what ???
another one?

Someone's gotta get in touch with SETI or nasa or something!!
these guys are definitely not from this planet!!!
You are not happily married, right?
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Old 9th December 2011, 16:34   #5883
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Re: The Official Joke thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by bluevolt View Post
Why Hindu Law does not permit Second Marriage...???

Answer- Indian Constitution-Article 20(2)-says No man can be punished twice for same offence.
@the emboldened bit,I think that the term Double Jeopardy can be/is used instead.
:-
If I had remembered this during my exams,I would have passed my "Constitution Of India and Professional Ethics" subject
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Old 9th December 2011, 20:15   #5884
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Re: The Official Joke thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by selfdrive View Post
Happy anniversary buddy!
I am sure you would have got more silence than the 2 mins you asked for

Its nice of you to report your safety and well being (for now) by typing this post out
Also hope that you didnt go ahead and give reasons in detail, in whose honour/ remembrance the 2 mins silence etc.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Swanand Inamdar View Post
Its my wedding anniversary today.
My wife asked me as to what gift would I like on this day?

I nonchalently answered - "2 mins of silence".

Didnt quite understand the part where, I am supposed to end up in the living room tonight.

P.S: All this is actually true.
I on behalf of all teambhp fellow members am constantly praying for the safety, security and well being of Mr Swanand ever since I read his post.Though I don't know him personally, that team spirit or better teambhp spirit.Happy Anniversary Swanandji.
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Old 9th December 2011, 21:44   #5885
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Re: The Official Joke thread

Surprising. We have quite a few henpecked husbands around here. Even more surprising is that they choose to type out their wo[e|w]s.

Reminds me of the story about the King asking a crowd to split into two - one side for those who obey their wives; and the other for those who refuse to obey their b[i|e}tter halves. There was only one guy on the latter side. The king asked him for details, and he replied - "my wife asked me not to disclose the truth"!!!
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Old 9th December 2011, 23:18   #5886
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Re: The Official Joke thread

now that we are discussing wives, some dialogs that get repeated quite often.

her: will you marry again if i died?
I: I have tried it once, take a guess.

her: do you love me?
I: I answered it y'day, do you want the answer to change? I can, just let me know.
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Old 9th December 2011, 23:21   #5887
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Re: The Official Joke thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by Swanand Inamdar View Post
Its my wedding anniversary today.
My wife asked me as to what gift would I like on this day?

I nonchalently answered - "2 mins of silence".

Didnt quite understand the part where, I am supposed to end up in the living room tonight.
I am assuming it's silent in the living room, unless you turn on the TV or something.
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Old 10th December 2011, 00:51   #5888
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Re: The Official Joke thread

Hope its not posted earlier:

Scenario I :
Boy makes mistake.
Girl Shouts.
Boy says SORRY.

Scenario II :
Girl make mistake.
Boy shouts.
Girl starts crying.
Boy says SORRY.
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Old 10th December 2011, 22:40   #5889
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Re: The Official Joke thread

Walmart opened a store in India and gave the franchise to one Agrawal. Next it was renamed as AgraWalMart.
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Old 10th December 2011, 23:38   #5890
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Re: The Official Joke thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by mukeshgoel View Post
Only Two Things Change A Woman's Mood:
1. I Love You!
2. 50% Discount!
:-)
Mukesh you might hear it from Condor
CONDOR where are you??

Jus to change the mood perspective -
* 1 thing that will change a woman's mood - Your "I love you at 50% discount"
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Old 11th December 2011, 13:44   #5891
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Re: The Official Joke thread

80-year-old man to Doctor : My 20-year-old wife is pregnant.

Doctor : Listen to this story. A hunter goes to the jungle. In a hurry, he takes his umbrella instead of his gun. In the jungle he suddenly comes face to face with a lion. He pulls the handle of his umbrella and fires. The lion dies.

Old Man : Impossible! Someone else must have fired a gun!

Doctor : That is exactly my point!
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Old 11th December 2011, 14:07   #5892
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Re: The Official Joke thread

This generation in a nutshell!
Attached Thumbnails
The Official Joke thread-392719_124739567640533_100003134707125_121188_377695287_n.jpg  

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Old 11th December 2011, 19:41   #5893
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Re: The Official Joke thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scarlet_Rider View Post
80-year-old man to Doctor : My 20-year-old wife is pregnant.

Doctor : Listen to this story. A hunter goes to the jungle. In a hurry, he takes his umbrella instead of his gun. In the jungle he suddenly comes face to face with a lion. He pulls the handle of his umbrella and fires. The lion dies.

Old Man : Impossible! Someone else must have fired a gun!

Doctor : That is exactly my point!
Artillery problems in a nutshell!
Here is a Marathi poster affixed by someone below the doorbell.
The Official Joke thread-mat-daar.jpg
It reads " The voters are asleep during noons. Do not ring the bell. Or else you won't get the vote. And do not bother, we will cast our votes in your favour."
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Old 11th December 2011, 20:14   #5894
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Re: The Official Joke thread

To all my friends to has bitten the shutter'bug'
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The Official Joke thread-382662_241762222558308_168028249931706_635824_1513821127_n.jpg  

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Old 11th December 2011, 22:22   #5895
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Re: The Official Joke thread

parallel parking!!No words!!

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