[TaureanBull]

Originally Posted by ghodlur

Congrats TBull on becoming the "Father of the Bride(s)".

BTW what does Jigisha mean?

Thanks a lot.

Jigisha means : strive for success.

[aargee]

Time for update

Originally Posted by aargee

The problem is he's refusing to go to school; its quite obvious for every child for first few days & I can understand that. But the thing is my Son is very much disturbed & that what I feel with the 2 symptoms below... they're much appreciated.

Yesterday for the first time he never cried for going to school as well as when coming back. Today for the first time, he made a lot of fuss to take him to school soon. His day starts usually by 9:00 AM, but he made lot of noise by 8:30 AM to take him to school & drop off.

Whaaw!!! That's a good sign I guess he's going to love his school from now on. I understood finally that its not the school that made him cry, but the absence of his parents is what troubled him. Hope he's overcome that now.

[ghodlur]

@Aargee,

Finally it seems things have sorted out and your son will love going to school. All the best.

One suggestion - Next time he cries, just record the entire episode and later when he is in a good mood, show it to him. He will be intrigued as to why was he crying. I do this now & then when my son throws tantrums. Remember I had earlier in this thread written about how he starts making a scene when he is in a mall or at a friend place. Whenever he starts it again, all I do is whip out my mobile and start recording without his knowledge and play it later on the TV about his antics. A couple of such recording and these days my son rarely makes a scene anywhere.

[aargee]

Originally Posted by ghodlur

Finally it seems things have sorted out and your son will love going to school. All the best.

Yes, I strongly agree with you on this. He's now running to school everyday & he seem to be very happy going to school. He's not crying these days.

Originally Posted by ghodlur

Whenever he starts it again, all I do is whip out my mobile and start recording without his knowledge and play it later on the TV about his antics

But the issue here is, these 2 little evils have snake eyes; the moment they spot the camera, they become still (don't know even if they breathe).

Originally Posted by ghodlur

One suggestion - Next time he cries, just record the entire episode and later when he is in a good mood, show it to him.

I made a greatest mistake of my life; you're right, I should've done this. I take pics of both my children every weekend without fail to watch how they grew, witnessing first teeth, their cries, laugh & so on, but I miserably failed only on this one!!! I'll capture the video frame for my Daughter.

Our Daughter has become a little monster & driving all of us nuts. She's screaming for no reason at times (joyfully ofcourse) & the moment she sees her Mother + Kitchen combination, she cried loud (but no tears), you may call tantrums, but this much more than that. She wants my Wife to carry her all the time in Kitchen or else she'll catch hold of her legs & throw large sounds (yes literally a 100 db loud speaker) . However, when my Wife is outside kitchen, Daughter doesn't bother her much.

We've tried all possibilites, ignore, let her cry but nothing seem to be working. Wifey has to hide herself in the Kitchen, otherwise, Daughter will turn the entire house to house of demons!!!

Guys, my Daughter is driving all of us maniac, can someone provide some suggestion pls? Is this the same case with anyone else?

[BaCkSeAtDrIVeR]

Originally Posted by aargee

Yes, I strongly agree with you on this. He's now running to school everyday & he seem to be very happy going to school. He's not crying these days.

Put my 2 year in a play school yesterday. Stayed there jsut to enable him get used to the atmosphere, and was surprised to find other children showing this kind of behavious - play and frolic all along, and then start bawling loud as soon as parents / elders come to pick them up.

I have arranged for an omni to take him to the play school, though this place is hardly 500 M from my house (I am travelling 2-3 days a week)/

the moment she sees her Mother + Kitchen combination, she cried loud (but no tears), you may call tantrums, but this much more than that. She wants my Wife to carry her all the time in Kitchen or else she'll catch hold of her legs & throw large sounds (yes literally

I suspect she wants to watch cooking.

We give out kids some wheat flour and water to make chappatis. So, we have 3 rolling pins, and platters to make chappatis, one for my wife, one for the daughter, and one for the little jhonny-come-lately.

No, everything else in the kitchen is out of bounds for them -- knife, gas cylinders, hot vessels, etc.

And we do not hesitate to use the stick if they even go any near the out of bound area. Sorry, kids, al right, but safety is safety. Pain of the stick is better than pain of burns / cuts / bruises.

And when no cooking is happening, we allow them to throw the utensils around. Since everything is stainless steel, there are no problems here.

[aargee]

Originally Posted by BaCkSeAtDrIVeR

I have arranged for an omni to take him to the play school, though this place is hardly 500 M from my house (I am travelling 2-3 days a week)

Start watching the Omni in addition; I'm not joking, these morons drive as if they've no tomorrow. Just a word of caution.

Originally Posted by BaCkSeAtDrIVeR

I suspect she wants to watch cooking.

Well in that case, why doesn't she do this with my Mother? She only insisit on my Wife always. She's a normal good kid until she sees her Mother. After that the normal kid turns to monster kid somehow. I don't know what's going on with her. This is something that we don't understand at all. Oh!!! one more thing, she also hates when her Mother eats. May be...may be, she doesn't wants her Mother do anything except looking after her, but then, when my Wife sits in the hall doing nothing, she turns her attention towards something else & then the screams or tantrums stops. Very weird behaviour though!!!

We treat both our Son & Daughter equally in all terms. Do you think, that's a problem? Should we be partial?

Originally Posted by BaCkSeAtDrIVeR

And when no cooking is happening, we allow them to throw the utensils around. Since everything is stainless steel, there are no problems here.

This worked perfectly with our Son at the same age. He used to be a nice kid, give him vessels & he'll be quiet for several hours. But our Daughter's attitude has become a menace & this happens only with my Wife, not with anyone else.

[BaCkSeAtDrIVeR]

Do some role playing games. Let her be the mother, and her mother the daughter. And the "kid" will take the "mother" to kitchen, and let the fun begin!!!

[benbsb29]

Originally Posted by aargee

Our Daughter has become a little monster & driving all of us nuts. She's screaming for no reason at times (joyfully ofcourse) & the moment she sees her Mother + Kitchen combination, she cried loud (but no tears), you may call tantrums, but this much more than that. She wants my Wife to carry her all the time in Kitchen or else she'll catch hold of her legs & throw large sounds (yes literally a 100 db loud speaker) . However, when my Wife is outside kitchen, Daughter doesn't bother her much.

.....Is this the same case with anyone else?

Aargee, you can take comfort in the fact that my 19 month old daughter behaves the exact same way when my wife is in the kitchen. As you mentioned, when my wife isnt in the kitchen, and is just sitting around in the hall, there is no issue at all, and the little one just plays nearby without any fuss.

So, how did we deal with this? Well, not directly, but we got ourselves a cook so my wife gets to spend more time with the kid rather than in the kitchen.

[aargee]

Originally Posted by BaCkSeAtDrIVeR

Do some role playing games. Let her be the mother, and her mother the daughter. And the "kid" will take the "mother" to kitchen, and let the fun begin!!!

Boy!!! She's turning one in next 20 days!!! We can't do a role play!!! But it works with my Son who's 3.

Originally Posted by benbsb29

Aargee, you can take comfort...just plays nearby without any fuss.

Aaah!!! good (relieved) to see this is something normal attitude of an infant. I was worried, if my Daughter has some issues. (the second child syndromes etc)

Originally Posted by benbsb29

So, how did we deal with this? Well, not directly, but we got ourselves a cook so my wife gets to spend more time with the kid rather than in the kitchen.

Lol; infact my Mother got fed up with my Daughter that she's literally pushing my Wife out of kitchen since last 2 days & that's when I started worrying if there's something wrong with my Daughter.

But there should be some problem or any (medical or non medical) term associated for this & we should stop this. We never used a cradle for our daughter, do you think this has any relation to this attitude?

But I can't be glad, we need to find out something to cut off this attitude. Some suggestions

[benbsb29]

Originally Posted by aargee

.... We never used a cradle for our daughter, do you think this has any relation to this attitude?

Neither did we. Actually, my FIL tried to put her in a cradle, but she resisted, maybe she felt claustrophobic. The little one didnt sleep for much of that night, since it appeared she feared we would put her back in the cradle. I then decided, lets not put her in a cradle.

We didnt give much thought to this behaviour since we felt this was because she wasnt getting to spend much time with the mother after returning from daycare.

When my wife is in the kitchen in the mornings, the little one doesnt mind; its usually the evenings we have noticed this behaviour.

[pankaj_sachdeva]

@aargee and ben : my 9 month old boy demonstrates the same behavior and it is not limited to kitchen in our case. he wants to be his mother wherever she goes and if we do not pay heed to his crying (of course without tears) or controlled screaming, he starts on the top of his voice and i bet, our neighbors can hear those too.

He does scream mildly to gain my or his grandparents attention to carry him while he is sitting and we are walking around, but the loud screams happen only with his mother. He stays perfectly fine when his mother is just next to him

Yesterday night onwards, he has started screaming while playing too and he seemed super excited while doing that

I am not so sure, but it seems to be normal phenomenon now a day with kids. We visited yesterday to see his doctor for vaccinations and after examination; doctor told he is on right track of development.

and yes: we never used a cradle for him too. He doesn't like to be in a limited space and keeps the major part of the bed to himself.

[aargee]

Originally Posted by benbsb29

When my wife is in the kitchen in the mornings, the little one doesnt mind; its usually the evenings we have noticed this behaviour.

Kids are very rebelious in the evening, especially after 6PM, just my observation on both my kids.

Originally Posted by pankaj_sachdeva

my 9 month old boy demonstrates the same behavior and...neighbors can hear those too.

Same case with my Daughter, neighbours being atleast 75 feet distance can hear her screams.

Originally Posted by pankaj_sachdeva

Yesterday night onwards, he has started screaming while playing too and he seemed super excited while doing that

IMO, just ignore that behaviour or encourage doing something else when he does that, its sure to disappear in few days.

Originally Posted by pankaj_sachdeva

I am not so sure, but it seems to be normal phenomenon now a day with kids.

Well, we didn't observe this pattern with my Son, he's not too old, he's just 3. But yes, we used cradle for him extensively.

Originally Posted by benbsb29

Neither did we.

Originally Posted by pankaj_sachdeva

and yes: we never used a cradle for him too

Are we seeing a pattern here?

While discussing with you guys on this, I had this thought - with my Son things were much easier, if he's rebelious, it all means one thing, he wants my attention. I take him in my arms, hug him with affection & then play with him for 5 minutes & then he turns charming. May be I should ask my Wife to do the same with my Daughter probably. I'll test it this evening & let you guys know if there're any improvements.

[whitesquall]

Hey! update from my side! My daughter turned 3.5 months old and on that same day she started to "ROLL"! what a sight it is! wonderful!

It was very funny the first time when she did it. She was surprised at her own feat and started screaming! ha ha ha ha

[aargee]

@Benbsb & Pankaj - Last night we gave our Daughter some utensils after playing with her for a minute or so. Result? She was cool & didn't make tantrums at all. So what I'm observing is, she needs some attention once in a while.

I guess its going to be my Son's turn now. He woke up early in the morning & started his own share!!!

[benbsb29]

Originally Posted by aargee

@Benbsb & Pankaj - Last night we gave our Daughter some utensils after playing with her for a minute or so. Result? She was cool & didn't make tantrums at all. So what I'm observing is, she needs some attention once in a while.

That's good to hear. So, our deduction was right, about getting the mother's attention and their presence.