I saw a new Scorpio MHawk last evening with a huge red sticker on the front windscreen which was I am sure was meant to indicate "King" in Hindi . Looks like there was a transliteration problem and the word spelled out in English shows up as "Badushah" which is a sad round sweet instead of "Badshah".
Why do skodas have a rear wash wipe ?
........To remove the flies that crash into them
How do you double the value of a Skoda ?
Fill the tank !
Why does a Skoda have a double rear window heater ?
To keep everyones hands warm when they are pushing it !
What do you call a skoda driver who say's he has a speeding ticket ????
I had to part with my skoda as it was costing to much,
I was only doing 10 miles to every pair of trainers!!
These jokes aren't to be taken seriously as if you are a skoda driver you have bought a very ... umm... practical car. These jokes represent the old skoda and by no way the new improved version of our favorite brand.
A monk was driving in India when suddenly a dog crossed the road. The car hit and killed the dog. The monk looked around and seeing a temple, went to knock on the door. A monk opened the door. The first monk said: "I'm terribly sorry, but my karma ran over your dogma."
* "What are you doing today, oh mother of my children?" queries papa Ji. "Well," replies mum Ji, "I think I'll get some chores out of the way, like marrying off your son!" "What a great idea," agrees dad. "You do that while I wash the cars!"
* Santa Singh decided to start a chicken farm so he bought 100 chickens from a dealer. A month later he returned to the dealer for another 100 because all of the first lot had died. A month later he was back to the dealer for another hundred after the second lot had also died. The dealer asked: "What happened to the other chickens?" "I don't know," said the man, "maybe I'm planting them too deep."
* After making a trip to south India, Santa Singh, his wife and son were returning to Punjab by Tamilnadu Express. Santa Singh was occupying the lower berth, his wife the middle berth and his son the top-most berth in the train. When the train stopped at a station the son asked his father for some ice cream. When they returned they saw that a south Indian who couldn't understand Hindi had occupied his son's berth. Outraged, Santa Singh called the inspector and asked him to help. The inspector said he couldn't understand Hindi so it would be better if Santa explained the whole situation in English. Santa said: "That man sleeping on top of my wife is not giving berth to my children."
How To Call The Police When You're Old And Don't Move Fast Anymore
Got this as an email forward
George Phillips, an elderly man, from Meridian, Mississippi, was going up to bed, when his wife told him that he'd left the light on in the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window. George opened the back door to go turn off the light, but saw that there were people in the shed stealing things.
He phoned the police, who asked "Is someone in your house?"
He said "No," but some people are breaking into my garden shed and stealing from me.
Then the police dispatcher said "All patrols are busy. You should lock your doors and an officer will be along when one is available."
George said, "Okay." He hung up the phone and counted to 30.
Then he phoned the police again.
"Hello, I just called you a few seconds ago because there were people stealing things from my shed. Well, you don't have to worry about them now because I just shot them." and he hung up..
Within five minutes, six Police Cars, a SWAT Team, a Helicopter, two Fire Trucks, a Paramedic, and an Ambulance showed up at the Phillips' residence, and caught the burglars red-handed.
One of the Policemen said to George, "I thought you said that you'd shot them!"
George said, "I thought you said there was nobody available!"
Don't mess with old people
Last edited by BenjiRoss : 23rd April 2009 at 12:45.
Picture on the Nightstand
After a long night of making love, he notices a photo of another man on her nightstand bed. He immediately begins to worry.
"Is this your husband?" he nervously asks.
"No, silly." She replies, snuggling up to him.
"Your boyfriend than?" he continues.
"Not at all." She says nibbling on his ear.
"Is it your dad or your brother?" he inquires hoping to be reassured.
"No, no, no!!!" she answers.
"Well then who in the Hell is it?" he demands.
"That's me before my surgery."
A Pennsylvania State Trooper pulled a car over on I-81 about two miles north of the PA/MD state line. When the trooper asked the driver why he was speeding, the driver answered that he was a magician and a juggler, and he was on his way to Harrisburg to do a show that night at the Zembo Shrine Circus and didn't want to be late.
The trooper told the driver he was fascinated by juggling, and if the driver would do a little juggling for him, he would not give him a ticket.
The driver told the trooper that he had sent all of his equipment on ahead and didn't have anything to juggle.
The trooper told him that he had some flares in the trunk of his patrol car and asked if he could juggle them.
The juggler stated that he could, so the trooper got three flares, lit them and handed them to the juggler.
While the man was doing his juggling act, a car pulled in behind the patrol car, a drunk got out, and watched the performance briefly.
He then staggered over to the patrol car, opened the rear door and got in. The trooper observed him doing this and went over to the patrol car, opened the door, and asked the drunk what he thought he was doing.
The drunk replied, "You might as well take my *** to jail, cause there's no way in the world I can pass that test."
Last edited by rupinder : 25th April 2009 at 01:37.