The Official Joke thread

prateekm · 21st February 2011, 14:45

Car Shopping

A lady walks into a BMW dealership. She browses around, spots the Top-of-the-line Beemer and walks over to inspect it. As she bends over to feel the fine leather upholstery, she inadvertently breaks wind.

Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and prays that a sales person doesn't pop up right now.

As she turns around, her worst nightmare materializes in the form of a salesman standing right behind her. Cool as a cucumber and displaying complete professionalism, the salesman greets the lady With, "Good day, Madame. How may we help you today?" Very uncomfortably, but hoping that the salesman may just not have been there at the time of her accident, she asks, "Sir, what is the price of this lovely vehicle?"

He answers, "Madam, if you farted just touching it, you are going to sh*t yourself when I tell you the price."

turbo1787 · 21st February 2011, 23:33

Quote:

Originally Posted by cyclops

Nice one.. AFAIK, Dantak also handles Sikkim Roads, probably all of NE..

Cyclops- Dantak only handles bhutan and the roads connecting India with Bhutan. Sikkim is mostly handled by Project Swastik.

prince_pervez · 21st February 2011, 23:56

Quote:

Originally Posted by prateekm

He answers, "Madam, if you farted just touching it, you are going to sh*t yourself when I tell you the price."

That was a good one. I burst out of laughter on this one.

DWind · 22nd February 2011, 12:07

Quote:

Originally Posted by speedmiester

I think one should challenge this ticket in the court.

I believe the traffic constable meant motorcycle and typed M and auto-complete in blackberry typed it as minilorry.

dhanushs · 22nd February 2011, 22:53

Disagreement, LITERALLY!!..

cyclops · 23rd February 2011, 11:01

Quote:

Originally Posted by turbo1787

Cyclops- Dantak only handles bhutan and the roads connecting India with Bhutan. Sikkim is mostly handled by Project Swastik.

Sorry

, but BRO maintains NH31A which is the lifeline of Sikkim and probably several other in-roads under project Dantak.. This is a beautiful stretch of highway from Siliguri to Gangtok, full of steep twisties, with river Teesta flowing along the route..

vivekiny2k · 25th February 2011, 00:28

this will keep you busy for a while

Crazy THINGS PARENTS TEXT ™

zteg · 26th February 2011, 10:20

Future wedding:::

Priest-Do u agree 2 chnge ur FB status 4m single 2 married?
Guy-likes
Gal-likes
P- I now pronounce u man n wife..U may now poke d bride

goandude · 26th February 2011, 12:42

Quote:

Originally Posted by vivekiny2k

this will keep you busy for a while

Crazy THINGS PARENTS TEXT ™

Busy and holding on to my guts . thanks for sharing

dhanushs · 28th February 2011, 02:38

There is never an upper age limit for true petrol heads..

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Size: 102.1 KB

silversteed · 28th February 2011, 10:35

^^^ You can find many such sightings here.

Swanand Inamdar · 2nd March 2011, 20:16

Puneri Wrong Number.

Disclaimer: This joke is going to be very regional. People who understand Marathi, or better yet, those who know the "Puneri" mentality will get the joke.

This is a conversation that took place on a wrong numberwallh call.

Guy 1: Hello...
Guy 2: Ha kon?
Guy 1: Deshpande ahet ka?
Guy 2: (Irritated) Nahi te Pavankhindit rahtat.
Guy 1: Mag tyanna sanga, Maharaj gadawar pochle... ata melat tari chalel.

typeOnegative · 2nd March 2011, 21:46

Quote:

Originally Posted by Swanand Inamdar

Puneri Wrong Number..... Mag tyanna sanga, Maharaj gadawar pochle... ata melat tari chalel.

My wife is Puneri and she did not get it. Care to explain?

Chipz · 3rd March 2011, 06:59

Most of the people here wont even know what Puneri is or even know marathi.. Can you explain a bit.

Swanand Inamdar · 3rd March 2011, 14:00

Quote:

Originally Posted by typeOnegative

My wife is Puneri and she did not get it. Care to explain?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chipz

Most of the people here wont even know what Puneri is or even know marathi.. Can you explain a bit.

Sorry guys, i did mention earlier that this would not be understood by many.

Ok, there is a bit of a history reference to the joke. Deshpande (Baji Prabhu Deshpande) had fought in Pavankhind for the safe passage of Shivaji maharaj, when he tried escaping from Panhala fort. Only after Shivaji reached the fort and the signal was given, did he give up fighting in the battle, hence costing his life.

So basically, in the joke, when the person called for deshapnde, the other guy (getting irritated) mentioned that Deshpande lives in Pavankhind. So the first guy, not admitting his mistake goes on further to state, that "Please inform him that Maharaj has reached the fort, now you can die in peace".

i hope that would make things clear.

Once again sorry to all those who didnt get it.

21st February 2011, 14:45	#4711
prateekm BHPian Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Mumbai & BLR Posts: 789 Thanked: 555 Times	Re: The Official Joke thread Car Shopping A lady walks into a BMW dealership. She browses around, spots the Top-of-the-line Beemer and walks over to inspect it. As she bends over to feel the fine leather upholstery, she inadvertently breaks wind. Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and prays that a sales person doesn't pop up right now. As she turns around, her worst nightmare materializes in the form of a salesman standing right behind her. Cool as a cucumber and displaying complete professionalism, the salesman greets the lady With, "Good day, Madame. How may we help you today?" Very uncomfortably, but hoping that the salesman may just not have been there at the time of her accident, she asks, "Sir, what is the price of this lovely vehicle?" He answers, "Madam, if you farted just touching it, you are going to sht yourself when I tell you the price." Last edited by prateekm : 21st February 2011 at 14:46.*

22nd February 2011, 22:53	#4715
dhanushs Distinguished - BHPian Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Chennai Posts: 4,439 Thanked: 11,488 Times	Re: The Official Joke thread Disagreement, LITERALLY!!..

25th February 2011, 00:28	#4717
vivekiny2k Senior - BHPian Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: cincinnati, jabalpur,chennai Posts: 1,264 Thanked: 212 Times View My Garage	Re: The Official Joke thread this will keep you busy for a while Crazy THINGS PARENTS TEXT ™

26th February 2011, 10:20	#4718
zteg BHPian Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Mangalore/Bangalore Posts: 331 Thanked: 91 Times	Re: The Official Joke thread Future wedding::: Priest-Do u agree 2 chnge ur FB status 4m single 2 married? Guy-likes Gal-likes P- I now pronounce u man n wife..U may now poke d bride

28th February 2011, 02:38	#4720
dhanushs Distinguished - BHPian Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Chennai Posts: 4,439 Thanked: 11,488 Times	Re: The Official Joke thread There is never an upper age limit for true petrol heads..

28th February 2011, 10:35	#4721
silversteed Senior - BHPian Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Electri-City Posts: 2,366 Thanked: 2,236 Times	Re: The Official Joke thread ^^^ You can find many such sightings here.

2nd March 2011, 20:16	#4722
Swanand Inamdar Senior - BHPian Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: Chicago, IL Posts: 1,644 Thanked: 587 Times	Re: The Official Joke thread Puneri Wrong Number. Disclaimer: This joke is going to be very regional. People who understand Marathi, or better yet, those who know the "Puneri" mentality will get the joke. This is a conversation that took place on a wrong numberwallh call. Guy 1: Hello... Guy 2: Ha kon? Guy 1: Deshpande ahet ka? Guy 2: (Irritated) Nahi te Pavankhindit rahtat. Guy 1: Mag tyanna sanga, Maharaj gadawar pochle... ata melat tari chalel.

3rd March 2011, 06:59	#4724
Chipz BHPian Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Trivandrum, Thrissur Posts: 160 Thanked: 6 Times	Re: The Official Joke thread Most of the people here wont even know what Puneri is or even know marathi.. Can you explain a bit.