![]() | #5176 |
Senior - BHPian ![]() Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Bangalore
Posts: 3,468
Thanked: 4,120 Times
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![]() | #5177 |
BHPian ![]() Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Guwahati
Posts: 348
Thanked: 71 Times
| ![]() With apprehensions of getting condored, here I go ![]() A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen. Ugh!" The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!" The man says: "You go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you." Source: Wikipedia |
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![]() | #5178 |
Senior - BHPian ![]() Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Hyderabad
Posts: 1,666
Thanked: 338 Times
| ![]() This was on Facebook . Boy asked God, " Why she loves rose which dies in a day, but doesn't love me who dies for her everyday?" God replied, "Mast hai!! Put it on Facebook!" ![]() |
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![]() | #5179 | |
BHPian ![]() Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: MADRAS
Posts: 638
Thanked: 206 Times
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1. Every hero rides their bike in super speed with the clutch engaged. 2. Every hero starts and rides past without opening the petrol on/reserve knob. 3. Whenever anybody speaks on the coin phone, they dont put another coin after 60 seconds to continue. They go on and on and on and on.. | |
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![]() | #5180 | |
Distinguished - BHPian ![]() ![]() | ![]() Quote:
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![]() | #5181 | |
BHPian ![]() Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: MADRAS
Posts: 638
Thanked: 206 Times
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Little Johnny was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar after another. After the 6th one a man on the bench across from him said, "Son, you know eating all that candy isn't good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, make you fat." Little Johnny replied, "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old." The man asked, "Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time?" Little Johnny answered, "No, he minded his own business!" ![]() | |
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![]() | #5182 | |
Senior - BHPian ![]() Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: Chicago, IL
Posts: 1,645
Thanked: 583 Times
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************************************ Off FB (where else! Thats where all the jokes are nowadays!) I ran into my ex the other day! Just to be sure, engaged Reverse and ran into her again and again! | |
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![]() | #5183 |
Senior - BHPian ![]() | ![]() Couple of more from side. Santa applied in a medical college but never cleared it as these were his answers: Antibody: one who hates his/her body! Artery: Study of painting! Bacteria: Back door of cafeteria! Coma: punctuation mark! Genes: Blue Denim! Labor pain: hurt at work! Ultrasound: Radical Sound! Cardiology: advance study of playing cards! ![]() ___________________________________________ Boy was in a bus. Suddenly driver applied break.He fell on a girl & kissed her. Girl : Hey!What are you doing? Boy: Engineering & you? she smiled & said B.Sc Moral:Always think about studies first ![]() |
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![]() | #5184 |
Senior - BHPian ![]() Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Bangalore
Posts: 3,468
Thanked: 4,120 Times
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![]() | #5185 |
Senior - BHPian ![]() Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Delhi
Posts: 1,609
Thanked: 2,294 Times
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Little Johnny has apparently said this to someone else before. You are hereby "Condored" ![]() http://www.team-bhp.com/forum/shifti...tml#post119259 |
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![]() | #5186 |
Senior - BHPian ![]() Join Date: May 2009 Location: Chennai
Posts: 4,079
Thanked: 3,576 Times
| ![]() Five Germans in an Audi Quattro arrive at the Italian border. The Italian Customs Officer stops them and tells them "It'sa illegala to putta 5 people in a Quattro." "Vot do you mean it's illegal?" asks the German driver. "Quattro meansa four" replies the Italian official. "Quattro is just ze name of zefokken automobile" the German says unbelievingly. "Look at ze dam papers: ze car is designed to karry 5 persons" "You canta pulla thata one on me!" replies the Italian customs officer. "Quattro meansa four. You have five-a people ina your car and you are thereforea breaking the law." The German driver replies angrily, "You idiot! Call your zupervisor over. I vant to speak to someone viz more intelligence!" "Sorry" responds the Italian officer, "He can'ta come. He'sa busy witha 2 guys in a Fiat Uno. :-) Cheers!! Last edited by Technocrat : 23rd September 2011 at 00:29. Reason: Please avoid posting an entire post in Bold, thanks |
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![]() | #5187 |
Senior - BHPian ![]() Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Hyderabad
Posts: 1,666
Thanked: 338 Times
| ![]() Another one from facebook ![]() "Newtons new law of motion...... Loose motion cannot be done in slow motion !!!! ![]() |
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![]() | #5188 |
Senior - BHPian ![]() Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Trivandrum, KL
Posts: 4,905
Thanked: 6,952 Times
| ![]() Fred is 32 years old and he is still single. One day a friend asked," Why aren't you married? Can't you find a woman who will be a good wife?" Fred replied, " Actually, I've found many women I wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mom doesn't like them." His friend thought for a moment and said,"I've got the perfect solution, just find a girl who is just like your mother." A few months later they met again and his friend said, "Did you find the perfect girl? Did your mother like her?" With a frown on his face, Fred answered,"Yes, I found the perfect girl. She was just like my mother. You were right, my mother liked her very much." Then friend said,"Then, what's the problem?" Fred replied," my father doesn't like her." |
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![]() | #5189 |
BHPian Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Chennai
Posts: 146
Thanked: 24 Times
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![]() | #5190 |
BHPian Join Date: May 2010 Location: Bangalore
Posts: 516
Thanked: 70 Times
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